Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:

i love you [Read it]


A man escape from prison where he has been for 15 years.he broke into a house to look money and gun and finds young couple in bed
he ordered the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair then tie the girl to the bed get on top of her kisses her neck then gets up and go into the bathroom.while he is in
there the husband told the wife now listen this guy is an escaped convict look at his cloth and has spent a long time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years I saw how he kiss your neck if he want sex don't resist don't complain do whatever he tells you this guy is probably dangerous if he get angry he will kill us be strong honey I love you
his wife response he wasn't kissing my neck he was whispering to me. he told me he was gay.thought you were cute and asked if we have any Vaseline. I told him that it is in.the bathroom. be strong honey I love you
BABYFACE


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-01-24 18:28:57

871 Views



chicken soup [Read it]


Food is ready







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-27 14:22:30

629 Views




MY DARK PAST(CHAP.7)=>STORY BY NELLY
Please do not share without talking to me or her personally asking for permission, thank you for reading this story brought to you by Nelly aka Nnenna.
The activities and studies which went on in School made me forget my bad holiday but sometimes it reflects (the images of how I was raped by my own cousin) which makes me look dull in school.
There was a day I was called out by a teacher to come explain something on the blackboard, as I step out and faced the class I felt this feeling which I had when I was being raped by my cousin (it was my past reflecting at that moment), when I looked at the faces of my classmates fear gripped me because they were all smiling which made me think other wise (I thought they knew my secret, I really thought they could see my mind and the content inside).
I began to stammer looking confused and really paled --I was so ashamed of myself, I totally felt like turning into water at particular moment--, everyone looked at me in a confused manner because they knew I was never like that, even my friends were giving me the look of surprise (I was never the shy type when it comes to talking in front of the class so my reaction that moment shocked everyone including the teacher).
The teacher looked at me then asked me whether I was ok, I just replied him yes, he said nothing and told me to go back to my seat.
When I sat down back on my seat; my friends Mary and Stella threw questions at me, I gave them a straight answer (I told them that i just didn't feel to well).
They didn't believe me (it was shown on their faces) but they just had to go with what I told them at the point.
After the class the teacher called me to his office (he wanted to know what went wrong with me), when I got to his office we was busy marking assignments of students of other classes.
When he saw me he stopped what he was doing and told me to sit, I sat down gently like I was going to sit on glass, after I sat he threw questions at me focusing lies out of my mouth (every single question he asked was a question creating lies in my tongue).
He then asked me a question that shocked me very high, he said "Nnenna I hope nothing happened during your holiday because since you resumed back to school your life style has changed".
I was speechless at that moment, my tongue was twisting within my closed mouth, I just gathered up courage and spoke out, I said "No sir nothing went wrong, I'm just a little bit under the weather sir", I lie again hiding my horrible holiday happenings.
I left his office; going back to my class to face my friends who were going to slam me with different types of questions..........to be continue....chap.8 coming up soon so watch out.
THIS IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY NNANNA NNENNA A.K.A NOINOI JUST CALL ME NELLY
FACEBOOK USERNAME:NELLY NALLY
WHATSAPP NO;+22961804913


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Kenya is two hours ahead of Nigeria, it does not
mean that Nigeria is slow and it does not mean
that Kenya is faster than Nigeria. Both
countries are working based on "Time Zone".
There's one that married as a virgin and
'waited' ten years before having a child yet
there is another who had had series of abortion
before marriage yet gave birth after nine
months.
There is one that graduated at the age of 22 yet
waited 5 years before securing a job, yet there
is another who graduated at the age of 30 and
secured employment immediately.
There is one who became a CEO at the age of
25 and dies at the age of 50, there is another
who became a CEO at the age of 50 and lives to
90, both worked based on 'Time Zone' and
some just happen to have everything work fast
for them. So work based on your 'lane'.
Colleagues, friends, associate, younger one(s)
might have gone ahead of you don't envy them,
it's their 'Time Zone' yours too will come. Just
hold on and be strong, it won't be long
everything is gonna be alright.
Keep Moving, put more efforts and Above all
Pray for God's blessings in all your doing... See
You on top. . .


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Who love me most episode 18

It was the next day morning, mrs ada Marcus was already in the hospital,she was with maxwell who was till unconscious,she rushed down to port Harcourt as soon as possible when she heard what has happened to her son,she was sitting close to maxwell bed,one of the nurse walked in holding a tray injection,a cotton wool, and a small bottle was seen in the tray.

Nurse :good morning mam

Mrs ada Marcus :good morning

The nurse drop the tray beside the bed of maxwell, took the injection, she them draw some liquid from the small bottle into the injection and then inject it into the drip fixed on him.

Mrs ada Marcus :how is he

Nurse :he will be fine,he is responding to treatment.

Mrs ada Marcus key

As the nurse was about to leave maxwell started murmuring,Mrs ada Marcus draw closer to him,so that she can hear what he is saying.

Mrs ada Marcus :i think he is trying to say something

Just then maxwell slowly opened his eyes,mrs ada Marcus was so happy

Mrs ada Marcus :ah he has woken up,maxwell, maxwell, thank God

The nurse quickly ran to get the doctor,few minutes later the doctor came in

Doctor :madam, please excuse me

Mrs ada Marcus gave way for the doctor to pass,after examininghim,he turned to mrs ada Marcus

Doctor :his blood pressure is normal, your son was lucky the bullet didn't hit the wrong position, so in no time he will be okey,and meanwhile the police said if he wakes up i should inform them so that they can heard from him what happened

Mrs ada Marcus :no problem, thank you

Maxwell :i am so tried

Doctor :yes you are,you will be okey, madam he really needs some food any thing light for now,so you should work on that.

Mrs ada Marcus :that's won't be a problem

Doctor :i will come check on you later,

Mrs ada Marcus thanked the doctor and the doctor left, she held maxwell by the hand

Mrs ada Marcus :how are you feeling

Maxwell :fine,

It was so difficult for maxwell to speak because he was so tried

Maxwell :where is Amara

Mrs ada Marcus :i will call her,as soon as I leave here okey,i have called your father and siblings we were all worried about you,your father will be coming down to nigeria very soon,please be strong for me okey.let me get you something to eat, what would you like to eat.

Maxwell :anything

Mrs ada Marcus key Just wait, let me go get them.

she got up and left,maxwell close his eye to sleep, some minutes later Mrs ada Marcus came in with the food and some fruit, she added one more pillow to the one on maxwell head so that he can be able to eat cause he can't sit up now,maxwell finished eating with the help of his mother, he drank some water and lied back on the bed,three police men walked into the room followed by the doctor. They all exchange a pleasant greetings,the police mens introduce themselves and told Mrs ada Marcus that they could love to ask her son some questions so she agreed.

Meanwhile amara entered the hospital and went to the nurse at the reception.

Amara :good afternoon nurse

Nurse :good afternoon

Amara :please am looking for a patient, i was told he was rushed here yesterday by some police men

Nurse :yes he is in ward five,take this entrance then by you right you will see him

Amara :thanks you.

She entered the entrance leading to ward five as she approach the room she heard people talking, she them went close to the door so she could heard what they were saying.

Police 1key now tell us what happened

Maxwell :well,i was in my car driving when a black car over take me and blocked me,there was also another at my back,then the two boys came down from the car behind me one was holding a gun and the other was holding a cutless, another boy came down from the car that blocked me,i recognised him,i knows him.

Police :what is him name

Maxwell :his name is chidi Jonathan, yeah

Amara heart was now beating so fast when she heard chidi name mentioned

Maxwell :he told me to come out of the car,which i did,i came down from the car because I thought he has come to warn me again the way he did the last time we met.

Police 3:what was it he warned you about.

Maxwell :he is dating a friend of mine and he thinks i am his raver, he has come to warn me once that i shouldn't be seen around her so he said i was been stubborn that he has come to fits me,i told him that he should let me go,i pleaded with him but he didn't care he then ask the two boy to beat me up,after numerous beating,he told them to stop,that was where he shut the both of them you told me that he has to kill them so as to leave no trace, that was when he shut me and left,it was with my last breath i made the call.

Mrs ada Marcus angry )so that good for nothing boy wants to kill my son all because of a woman, Amara it will never be well with you.

Maxwell :mum please she has nothing to do with this stop doing that,she is a victim as I am,she really don't know anything about this

But till Mrs ada Marcus didn't stop because she was so mad,she keep promising that he will make chidi pay for what he did,Amara who was till standing at the door was full with pain and guilt, she was bitterly crying, she couldn't believe chidi could go that far,she wouldn't bear all what she was hearing any more, she left the hospital till in tears, she headed to chidi house, when she arrived there she opened the gate because the gate wasn't locked, she went to the door and push it open,chidi came out of the kitchen to see who it was and he was so surprised to see amara crying, he was so worried,chidi then walk up to her trying to comfort her
Chidi :what's wrong, baby tell me

But amara angryly push him away, chidi was shocked

Amara at the top of her voice )stay away from me.

****TO BE CONTINUED ****

LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS AND
READ NEXT EPISODE


>>

Galib ne apni padosan ko 9 inch ka saman dikhate hue arz kiya:



Maana k tum bebas ho par itni b nahi,



k pal do pal k liye is MEHMAAN ko



ander bula bhi



na sako.Related

Truely, truely i say unto thee; nobody is perfect. Yes, Perfection is not attainable; but if thou chasest perfection, thy wilt catch excellency.
Now, Brethren, fix all thy eyes on perfection & thy will makest almost everything speedeth towards it!!!
Have a great, admirable & stupendous day!!
Surely, Surely I say unto thee; Your day shall be positive, A-1, Congenial, the best & second to none!!! #[email protected]
(#B-goF)


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Akpos and his wife celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in their home.
"Just think," Akpos says, "we were sitting here at this same breakfast table, naked as jaybirds, 50 years ago."
"Well," the old wife says, "what do you mean, should we get naked?"
"Yes" honey.
The two immediately took off their cloths and sit back down at the table.
"You know, honey," the old wife says slyly, "My breasts is still hot and it burn for you now as they did 50 years ago."
"I`m not surprised," replies Akpos. "One in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-04-14 08:43:48

6421 Views




I said to a fat girl today, “You’re a big girl!” She replied, “Tell me something I don’t know.” I said, “Salad tastes good.”Related

Ek baar ek aadmi apne padosi se charpai lene gaya.


Aadmi: Bhai saab, agar aap ke paas koi extra charpai hai toh please de dijiye, hamare ghar kuch guests aa gaye hain.


Padosi: Hamare pass 2 hi charpai hain. Ek per mein aur mere pitaji sote hain. Dusri per maa aur meri biwi…


Aadmi: Saalon, charpai mat do per sona to sikh lo…Related

A boy takes his girlfriend to a restaurant.


Boy: Kya khayegi?


Girlfriend: Jo aap khaoge


Boy: Vagina?


The girlfriend gets angry and slaps the boy.


Boy: Pagal Aurat, I was asking Veg hi na?Related

Love is like a cloud, love is like a dream;

Love is one word and everything in between;

Love is a fairytale come true, because I found you!Related


HOW TO BORROW AIRTIME FROM MTN WITHOUT PAYING BACK
How to Borrow Airtime from MTN
Without
Paying Back.
This will work for MTN Users Only
Take
Note!!
Follow the Steps below
1. Borrow airtime by dialing *606#
.
2. After you have exhausted the
borrowed
airtime, Dial *326# and change
your date
to 1/01/2010.
3. Remove your battery and Sim.
4. Insert d battery&Sim card back,
u’ll
receive a feedback Message from
MTN
saying :- Dear armed robber customer, the
thunder that
will
fire you is still at the Gym doing
press up.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-06-26 17:20:06

474 Views




Immediately nepa brought lite i saw smtin, when i ws usin my 3 finggers 2 bleep her roughly i coundnt find any trace of blood on my hands, bt c d cd i ws usin 2 4*k ws already stained by blood,even d bed cover gan self, cha! Power of D!ck!!!...she ws nt even aware wen nepa brought lite, wen open her eyez she close as fst as posible bkuz of d reflection of lght,...i ws still 4*kin her wen she tld me dat she ws feelin tired, she held me close 2 her self witin sm seconds she left me nd relax on d bed,i hav no doubt she has cum, bt me i ws nt getin close may b bkuz my mind ws nt ther,then after lyk 5 minutes of continuos bangin, i cum...mtcheew i no even enjoy am self, i fell on d bed, by den has already slept or should i say past out bt i wsnt bothered bkuz i can still hear her continuos breathing, i checked d time on my fone 3:45 am so i hv been 4*kin ds gal 4 1 hour nw..i ws very proud of my self 4 my new record last tym it ws 5 minuted, then 30 nd nw 1 hour...i com dey hapi. U knw dat feelin wen u reach a particular level in temple, dat ws hw i ws feelin lol, i ddnt even knw wen i slept of, only 4 me 2 open my eyez nd saw mary suckin my d!ck,i relaxed bck enjoyin d sensation, wow dis gal can suck oooo...nd she ws a virgin jst hours ago,cha! Children of nowadayz...porn movie ehhn!!!.b4 i knw it i ws already moanin after lyk 2 minutes, she stoped nd said my turn, i took d opputunity 2 check my tym nd it ws already 5:40 am...if course she didnt expect me 2 start suckin her blood stained pussy...i b vampire lol,i think of wat 2 tel her then i came up wit dis excuse
Me:em feelin heat i wnt 2 go nd tke my baf{wen fan ws at d highest speed ooo even though self person suppose baf ni}
Mary:ur body is cold na...na u gt my body 4 me
Me: dnt wory wen we gt 2 d batrum i wil eat u....we entered d bathrum @ d same tym pulled our cloth bt unfornately d shower ws nt runin faster as we wnted, we on d tap while waitin 4 tap i i started touchin her p**sy frm behind intentionally, scoopin water @ d same tym lol wen i felt dat dere ws no longer blood ther i tld her 2 turn nd spread her legs while standin, i gt down on my kneels, first of all i used tongue nd played with her clit, she moan ouuch!!! Holdin my pushin it insyd as if she wnted 2 stick my head insyd her,i started bitin nd eatin her up,after 4 lyk 5 minutes she cum, by den our bucket ws already filled, we started bafin each,she ws strokin my while i ws finger 4*kin her..she started moanin louder so i hv 2 on d tap again 2 @ list reduce d sound..i tld her 2 turn nd bend down nd hold d bucket,,,i entered 4rm behind though it ws my first tym usin da style bt i ws behavin lyk a pro, i started 4*kin her nd dis tym around it ws more slippery...i lasted 4 10 minutes as a result of d soap dat ws on my dick wen i penetrated{i pulled out immediately i ws feelin my cum nd offloaded my stuff wt d help of soap lol} her she also cum @ d same tym by den we were exhausted we manage 2 tke our baf chatin lyk a couple. We entered insyd d rum i checked tym 6:25 mtcheew no more sleep again na na afternoon tins. we started chatin bt i dnt knw wen i slept off, only 4 me 2 b wakin by a tap 4rm mary informin dat food ws ready....i cleaned my eyez wit d bck of my hands, bringin my fone @ d same tym 2 check tym...9:45 hmmmm nawa ooooh!!!


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Akpors again!! [Read it]


Akpors again
Akpors came back from lectures and was serious Hungry, with an angery and Red eye he immediatetly rushed to Kitchen and....




....

...

....
Sorri oooooo
TODAY IS MONDAY! Thanks for readings...
Thats all!

%Nazature...


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-24 12:31:52

280 Views



Hope [Read it]


If leicester can win the #BPL
Then i can marry nicki minaj.
#Hope
#B-gof


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-02 08:55:18

404 Views




Others might have forgotten;

But never can I;

May the tri-colour of my country;

Furls very high!

Happy Independence day!Related

Akpos no dey carry Last Akpos :- Papa, See my result,rnNa me carry 3rd. Papa Akpos :- Hahahaha,rnAkpos Akpos! Na now I knowrnsay na me born you. Akpos :- Shey I tell you na. Allrnthose time I dey carryrn35th..Na the teachers dey dornojoro, They know say I toornbrilliant. Papa Akpos :- I believe yournmy boy. Na now I fit buy thatrnBicycle wey you see for PaparnMetus shop ! Akpos :- Papa na u biko. Yournget mouth pass BasketMouth. Papa Akpos :- but, Who bernthe two idiots wey pass u sefrnAkpos? Akpos :- Na one WIZARD weyrnbe Isaac and one WITCH weyrnbe Patience. Papa Akpos :- No mind them,rnYou go show them next term.rnBut who you come pass na? Irnno say dem plenty and yournno fit mention all of them, Irnjust wan know how many of una dey class. Akpos :- Na just the three ofrnus I don mention so na…rnIsaac, Patience and Me. Narnjust the three of usrnPRINCIPAL put for ElementaryrnClass ‘F’ !!! Na im Akpos papa just landrnfor floor, gboossa, faint o!!!rn#BOLLYSHOW™


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-09-07 02:28:44

523 Views




Zindagi Vich Tenu Hamesha Yaad Rakhange;

Tere Naal Naal Gujre Pal Aabad Rakhange;

Je Tenu Bhul Vii Jaye Ta Koi Gal Nahi;

Assi Ta Teri Ik Ik Bhul Vi Yaad Rakhange!Related

The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman’s heart.

-Josiah G. HollandRelated

Fully naked guy standing in front of a Mirror- Kaash main Raja hota…Tabhi Bed pe leti uski Gf hus kar boli- Saale, Ek inch se bach gaya, warna Rani hota..!=)) =))Lagao POGO jisko nahi samjha.Related

I am still shocking people today, and I don’t know why. Is it because I’m a woman talking about sex and men? One magazine said that no one writes sex in the back of a Bentley better than Jackie Collins.

-Jackie CollinsRelated

The angel Gabriel came to the Lord and said, “I have to talk to you. We have some Indians up here in heaven and they are causing problems. They’re swinging on the pearly gates, my horn is missing, they are wearing Dolce and Gabana saris instead of their white robes, they are riding Mercedes and BMWs instead of the chariots, and they’re selling their halos to people for discounted prices. They refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven clear or clean, since they keep crouching down midway eating samosas and drinking chai (tea). Some of them are even walking around with just one wing! They do not believe in discipline and push their way through the line.’


The Lord said, “Indians are Indians. Heaven is home to all my children. If you want to know about real problems, give Satan a call.”


Satan answered the phone, ‘Hello? Damn, hold on a minute.”


Satan returned to the phone, ‘OK I’m back. What can I do for you?”


Gabriel replied, “I just wanted to know what kind of problems you’re having down there.”


Satan says, “Hold on again. I need to check on something.”


After about 5 minutes Satan returns to the phone and said, ‘I’m back. Now what was the question?”


Gabriel said, “What kind of problems are you having down there?”


Satan says, “Man I don’t believe this .. Hold on.”


This time Satan was gone at least 15 minutes.


He returned and said, “I’m sorry Gabriel, I can’t talk right now. These Indians are trying to install air conditioning and making hell a comfortable place to live in by putting out the fire, which is there to keep them uncomfortably hot!!


“Since they are so tech savvy, they were trying to start a telephone and IT connection between heaven and hell between ME and GOD. They have started a social network service for the troubled and believe in Karma and are good in convincing others. Some were trying to start a chai – pakora, Chole batura, channa, Dosa and samosa, barfi, Chakli and Dokla shop, which I had to stop.


“Many have no trouble living in dirt as they are so used to it down on earth. We have shortage of toilets to make them uncomfortable as this is Hell, but they have no problems in doing everything outside in open.


“They are excellent in corrupting everyone and my staffs are being bribed by them and I have difficulty in controlling the graft and corruption in Hell. They never complain as this place seems to be better from where they came. I am having such a hard time controlling and dealing with them!! I am therefore requesting you OH LORD, PLEASE send them back to earth as soon as they arrive for re-birth”.


So this is why Indians are the only ones that are re-born !Related

EPS 6

Jane snoozed the alarm clock. She caught sight of Henry who was staring helplessly at the ceiling looking so depress.
" darling, are you okay ?' She asked in a concerned tone.
" yeah I'm okay." Henry replied . henry was still thinking about the night incident . He didn't want to discuss about it with his wife. Ever since the news and the ball station thing happened , he thinks that they thinks his becoming insane, he himself is more confuse about everything, he breaths out heavily. Jane knows that something wasn't right, but she didn't want to ask more questions, her husband strange behaviours bothers her a lot , he wasn't on drugs or alcohol . she wonders as she thinks henry might want to be alone '
wanna go take a shower '
she thought that might be a better excuse to exits her self, though she really want to take a shower .
She walk towards the bathroom.
Few minutes later Linda rush in
" daddy daddy there's some one outside, he said he's looking for you".
' for me?' Henry ask surprisedly because he wasn't expecting any visitors this early morning, on a second thought he thinks it might be mark but hell no mark won't visit him this early .
" yes daddy he's waiting outside" Linda smirk .
'okay honey.
****
Henry opened the door and saw a young man staring at the environment , probably admiring the beauty ." how may I help you " despite all the odds, he asks in a gentle manner, trying as much as possible to keep his composure .
' good morning sir, the young man greets " I'm job..
Ah the picture guy ' henry guessed
' yes sir' job replied .
' what took you so long to deliver the pictures?' Henry queried.
" our system was having some bugs , he hand over an envelop
"okay." As henry collects it from him. " nice to see you" henry added as job left.
***
Henry drops the envelop on the table , he went to the fridge to take a can-beer. He lead his way back to were the envelop was. He stared at it for some few seconds before picking it up. He open the envelop and brought out two copy of photos , he look at it smiling, all the board members and Ellen taking a pose of the business deal. Few seconds, he notice something , there was no Ellen on the picture . He check all the face one by one but he could not find Ellen . " this is strange " he remember clearly that Ellen was standing right next to him, shaking hands . he immediately look at the spot , he could only see himself shaking hands with his secretary " how could this be" he rubes his eyes peering closer to the picture to be sure but could only see his secretary whereas it was Ellen on that very day they took the pictures. He calmed himself down, he didn't want to freak out or cause panic , it's wasn't a good idea. He picked his phone and call mark.
*****
Mark pointing at the secretary "that's Ellen shaking hands with you..."
" man are you drunk that's my secretary joshpine " henry said .
" but on that day it was Ellen " mark said ' I know, I know " Henry cuts in - " but I'm not seeing Ellen there." " you mean , you are seeing your secretary instead of Ellen " mark ask in curiosity .mark sight a can beer ' henry follow mark eyes , Henry knows that ,that's not good, he will probably think his drinking or something, to avoid that " no no mark not what you thinking ' ' have you been drinking ?' Mark finally asked. Henry sighs mark add " I don't know how you are seeing your secretary and I'm seeing Ellen.'
That's it mark henry cuts in " somebody is messing up with my mind somebody is manipulating me." ' ah ! Do you mean like a witch ?' Mark asked jokily.
Yes , yes Henry answered .
" c'mon man you and I know that those things don't exits anymore " mark said
"I know man but I'm so confuse , I feel like I'm losing my senses ' " Man I think you're under the influence of alcohol ' mark said which got henry angry " I told you I wasn't drinking , henry bellowed .
" then I think you should see a doctor " mark suggested "
do you think I'm crazy or what , am not hallucinating " he shrieked "
no, I think you're depress you need rest man and quite drinking"
henry glared at him " it's not the drink."
" Can you hear yourself, you are seeing things , you need a doctor . I have a friend he's a medical doctor , I will try and talk with him' mark said . henry shrugged as he took a copy of the photo. Take a look at it again still seeing his secretary " oh God this can't be " he murmurs.



NAIRAJOKES.COM




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An armed robber came to ur house,robbed u nd then gave u a gun to shoot and kill ur wife. Suddenly uWent on urknees pleading u cant bcos ulove her wholeheartedly. Then the angry robber collected the gun and gave itto ur wife quickly she collected the gun,pointed at u and pulled the trigger unfortunetly there was no bullet the robber collected the gun laughed and left . Friends be honest after this encounter what will u do if this woman happen to be ur wife?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-06 01:51:20

783 Views




Akpos entered a taxi and said to the driver &ldquorop me at the 1st roundabout”.
As they were going, a lady stopped them and says &ldquorop me at the 2nd roundabout”.
The driver said “No” and zoomed off.
“Why didn’t you carry the lady?” asked Akpos.
“I prefer to carry passengers that will drop on or before the first roundabout. After which I now proceed to carry new passengers down to the 2nd roundabout” replied the driver.
“Why?” asked Akpos
“I make more money. Many passengers dropping at the 2nd roundabout won’t like to pay double if I carry them before the 1st roundabout”
“What if you end up driving empty to the 1st roundabout? Don’t you think you will lose”.
"That’s not possible." says the driver.
Akpos then say to him “OK, I bet you 2000 Naira that you will drive down to the 1st roundabout with your back seat empty”
“HAHAHAHA! Ok” replied the driver.
After some minutes, Akpos started smiling as it’s now obvious that no other passenger is on the road.
 Just few distance remaining,  A school boy dropped the taxi and said &ldquorop me at the 1st roundabout”.
Akpos couldn’t believe his eyes.
The driver laughed and said “Enter Enter lets go!!!”
Just as the boy was about to open the door, Akpos immediately removed 50 Naira and give the small boy to enter another taxi.
The driver fainted. 



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-24 15:57:16

39296 Views




Three men took their wives to d hospital for
delivery,shortly the Nurse came out and asked,
who is Joseph that works with THREE CROWN
MILK, the man stood up, congratulations your
wife has delivered THREE(3) bouncing babies.
Shortly, d Nurse came out again and asked,
who is John dat works with 7up, the man stood
up, congratulations your wife has delivered
SEVEN(7) bouncing babies. Immediately, the
third man stud up and ran away because he
works at 33 LAGER BEER.
IF U are the third man what will u do, assumed
U WORKIN at 33 LAGER BEER.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-19 20:25:40

674 Views



akpos the mumu [Read it]


one day. akpos was been chased by two men and akpos ran into the bush and climbed a tree. when the men searched for akpos and they could not find him, one of the men said, dont worry i can catch him, if i shout his name 3 times he would answer and akpos shouted from the tree "if you like call my name 100 times i wont answer you.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-05 11:18:59

423 Views



Notice [Read it]


A very dangerous snake that has astonished
scientists in the world has been discovered.
according to BBC news, the strange snake keep on
increasing in length by 0.5cm every second and if
in any case it touches its body using its own body,
it dies immediately. That is the only way it can be
killed. This is the world most deadly and poisonous
snake for now. This kind of snake can only be
found in Nokia torchlight mobile phone under game
option, snake Xenia.
Thanks for wasting your time to read carefully...
.
.
.
.
Sis. GO-GETTER(sfn)


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-04 09:36:43

199 Views




Hello friends,
The moment you've been waiting for.

My wedding will be coming up on 18th of November 2016!

You can call my Sister for your invitation cards and clothes.
Ankara general : N250,000
Ankara special: N300,000
Aso-Ebi: N350,000 only, cash and carry

Gate fee:
My fans: N20,000
Regular: N50,000
VIP: N100,000
VVIP : N300,000
VVVIP: N500,000

Table for 5 people-N1,000,000

To sit with d bride: N3,000,000
To sit with d groom: N5,000,000
To sit with d couple: N10,000,000
To dine with the couple: N15,000,000

To Snap with Couples: N20,000,000

Thanks in advance as I hope to see you at the wedding.

It's fast approaching so you can start saving immediately.

Thanks and God bless.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-22 00:16:00

405 Views




TEACHER: If a lion is chasing you, what would you do?
STUDENT: I'd jump over the wall.
TEACHER: If the lion jumps over as well?
STUDENT: I'd climb a tree.
TEACHER: If the lion climbs the tree?
STUDENT: I will jump into the lake and swim.
TEACHER: If the lion also jumps into the water and swims after you?
STUDENT: Sir, are you on my side or on the lion's?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-11-14 19:54:27

98 Views



Toilet Codes [Read it]


Akpos in a hurry used the ladies 'toilet in a posh hotel'

He sat down and noticed four buttons - WW, WA, PP and APR.

Curious, he pressed WW and his butt was gently sprayed with WARM WATER, he loved it so much!

He then pressed WA and a blast of WARM AIR dried him up. Still loving it,

he pressed PP and a POWDER PUFF  made him smell fresh. Feeling pampered,

he decided to press the last button APR.

He later woke up in a hospital.

A nurse smiled and said to him, "Sir, APR means AUTOMATIC PAD REMOVER.
When the machine couldn't find a pad on you, it went for your balls.
Your balls are in the jar over there."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-09-13 11:23:18

270 Views




Akpos was chatting with this girl and the following conversation started:

AKPOS: Hey girl, I think your really hot, wanna go out?

GIRL: I have a boyfriend.

AKPOS: I have a Maths test on Monday.

GIRL: So? what does that have to do with this?

AKPOS: I thought we were just mentioning things that we can cheat on!


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-11-02 09:14:18

140 Views



Screemin Man [Read it]


One Day A Man Came To His House And Started Screemin Honey I Just Won One Million Naira Pack Ur Things
Wife:causal Or Formal
Man:pack Ur Things And Leave


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-04-23 09:32:01

448 Views



REAL NAME [Read it]


The best way to know a Nigerian Girl's
real name is to ask for her bank account
details... That's when "Natasha Hills"
turns to "Chinasa Okoro lobatan."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-04-19 22:00:57

350 Views




Height of flexibility:Baba Ramdev is so flexible that he gets tangled faster than his earphones.Related

My life’s irony:

When I joke, people take it seriously;

And when I am serious, people take it as a joke!Related

If you find me dead one of this fine days. Don't blame any one, its
Mugabe.
Robert Mugabe's Famous Quotes
1. Virginity is the best wedding gift any man would receive from his
newly wed wife but lately, there's nothing as such any-longer b'se
it'll have already been given out as a Birthday gift, token of
Appreciation, Job assurance, Church collection, Examination marking
schemes & for Lorry fares!"
2. Treat every part of your towel nicely because the part that wipes
your buttocks today will wipe your face tomorrow.
3. We are living in a generation where people “in love” are free to
touch each others’ private parts but cannot touch each others’
phones because they’re private”
4. Sometimes you look back at girls you spent money on rather
than send it to your mum and you realise witchcraft is real.
5. If you are a married man, and you find yourself attracted to
school girls, just buy your wife a school uniform.”
6. If President Barack Obama wants me to allow marriage for same-
sex couples in my country (Zimbabwe), he must come here so that I
marry him first.
7. South Africans will kick down a statue of a dead white man but
won’t even attempt to slap a live one. Yet they can stone to death
a black man simply because he’s a foreigner.
8. What is the problem? We now have aeroplanes which can take
them back quicker than the ships used by their ancestors.
9. Mr Bush, Mr. Blair and now Mr Brown's sense of human rights
precludes our people's right to their God-given resources, which in
their view must be controlled by their kith and kin. I am termed
dictator because I have rejected this supremacist view and frustrated
the neo-colonialists.
10. Cigarette Is a pinch of tobacco rolled in a piece of paper with
fire on one end and a fool on the other end.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-13 22:33:29

1263 Views




Teacher: If I Give U Four Akara In Ur Hands, And I Decide To Collect All The Akara Balls From U. What Will Be Left In Ur Hands?
Student: The Akara Oil!


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-04-15 13:23:07

380 Views



Boko Haram [Read it]


GIRL : Dad, my fiance is an hausa man
DAD : God forbid!, boko haram people!?... Noooooo!!!...
GIRL : he's Dangote's son....
DAD : Ahhhhhh, we are all Nigerians now...why are you still sitting down talking to me, call him the wedding can start tomorrow.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-19 20:13:01

310 Views



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