Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:


They brought wine today.

It was meant to be a small occasion, smaller than a normal wine-carrying ceremony. They had come with just two elders; one was Ichie Okwu, an elderly kin and the other Amaechi, Obinna’s uncle.

Ichie Okwu was tall and thin. He walked with a stoop, while Amaechi, short and round in his big polo shirt and broad brown trousers, bounced beside him.

Behind them, Obinna, his mother, his younger brother, Uzochukwu, and Ogechi, Amaechi’s wife, strolled along.

He was carrying the wine— a round gourd with fresh palm leaves stuffed to the mouth. It was said that the leaves would stop the wine from frothing over, but it still frothed anyway.

Bees buzzed around the mouth and once in a while Obinna waved around to drive them off.

‘Faga agba gi—they will sting you,’ his mother said.

He smiled and continued to drive the bees.

He looked at his mother and smiled again, differently now— shyly.

His mother smiled back at him with her lips turned down. ‘Ndi di agaba— husbands are moving,’ she murmured.

Her eyes met with Ogechi’s, and she began to chuckle. She leaned to Mama Obinna’s ear. ‘He should not forget to leave her with child before travelling,’ she whispered.

Mama Obinna laughed—a short he-he-he laugh that made it difficult to tell if she was truly amused at what the tall woman had said or just found it ridiculous.

Obinna heard them and turned away with a smile.

The smile lingered on his face. He was happy.

When his mother had suggested they carry wine to Ada’s parents and pay her bride price before his travel—to secure her fully— he’d felt awkward.

‘She will wait for me, Mama,’ he’d said to his mother. ‘She will, I know.’

Mama Obinna had hissed and told her son he knew nothing.

But now that they were on their way to their in-law’s house, he was happy. An exciting feeling of security swamped over him.

To be tied to her in marriage, the perfect assurance that she’d wait.

That she must.

‘Brother?’ his little brother called. ‘Don’t you think I should have carried my own wine too?’

They turned to look at the boy.

‘Uzochukwu, why do you think you should have carried wine too?’ their mother asked.

‘So that we pay Ugochi’s bride price too.’

Obinna was smiling. ‘You want to marry Ada’s sister?’

‘Not really,’ the boy said. ‘I don’t really like her. She talks too much, but she is the only one I can marry. I asked Ada’s friend, Ujunwa, to marry me and she laughed at me and said that I am still a small boy.’

Ogechi burst into laughter.

Mama Obinna was smiling and shaking her head.

Obinna placed one hand on his little brother’s shoulder. ‘Nnam, don’t worry, when the time comes, you will find a very good girl to marry, inu?’

‘That will be as beautiful as Adaku?’ the boy asked.

Obinna nodded. ‘Even more beautiful.’ He nestled the boy to his side.

***

Onochie and his wife, Uchechi, received their visitors well.

Three long benches were set under the orange tree in the front of their compound.

Four elders came from their side, two with their wives. The women all dressed well, in expensive or expensive-looking wrappers, blouses and matching stiff-fabric scarves.

Clothes that smelt heavily of camphor, indicating how very sparingly they were worn.

Ichie Okwu and Amaechi joined the other elders on the bench. They had all greeted in the way titled men do, slamming the back of their palms together, three times before taking each other’s hand.

The ones with animal skin fans used them.

Mama Obinna and Amaechi’s wife joined Uchechi in the backyard.

The jollof rice was done, hot, spicy and reddish. Uchechi was transferring it into a fat yellow cooler with a stainless steel plate. Another woman beside her was washing cups and plates and another rinsing them.

Mama Ukaa, the lanky woman well famed throughout the entire Iruowelle for her perfect ogiri, was at the fire place, quenching the cinders with water. She would sprinkle some water and the fire would give out a squeal as if in pain, raising a dust of ashes.

Uchechi stood and hugged Obinna’s mother. ‘Nwanne ayoola ogo—a sister has turned an in-law!’ she said, and they laughed.

‘Is the rice not too much?’ Mama Obinna asked.

Uchechi hummed. ‘Just wait till they start coming.’ She sat down to her work again.

Mama Obinna pulled a nearby back chair and sat beside her.

‘If not for the short notice, I’d have prepared ugba. You know na, ugba eji mala nwa Akwaeze [ugba with which they know a daughter of Akwaeze]!’

‘Awuu!’ Mama Obinna inclined her head. ‘Ada mmadu!’ They slapped their palms together.

She looked round. ‘My wife nko?’

Uchechi hummed. ‘That one? She has been in her room all morning with her friends.’ She joined her thumb and index finger together in the air. ‘Ordinary pepper she would not help me grind.’

Mama Obinna was laughing.

Uchechi dropped an open palm on her lap. ‘Hope your son is aware she doesn’t know how to cook?’

The women burst into laughter.

‘That one is no problem, my sister,’ Mama Obinna said. ‘I will gladly teach her.’

Uchechi gave a small, slow nod, as if in pity. ‘Ngwanu, God will be your strength. Even the goats and chickens know that I’ve tried!’

Another bout of laughter.

***

At the front of the house, Papa Adaku brought out a tray of kola and dropped it on the table in front of the men. ‘My brothers, kola has come,’ he said.

In the tray, were five large kola nut seeds beside a mound of garden egg fruits. Ugochi, Adaku’s younger sister, came out with a flat plate, a jar of groundnut butter and spoon. She dropped the items on the table beside the tray.

‘The king’s kola is in his hands,’ an elderly chief said.

The others nodded in support, muttering.

Adaku’s father picked one kola seed from the tray and gave the elderly chief, saying a proverb about the king respecting the presence of an elder too.

The elderly man took the kola from him, leaned forward and cleared his throat. He began to say the prayers and the others chorused ‘Ise!’ at the end of every line.

When he was done, he broke the kola and threw the pieces inside the plate. ‘Ha!’ he exclaimed. ‘Oji udo—the kola of peace! Nwanne ayana nwanne ya—a brother should not move without the brother!’

They nodded and called him his title. ‘Eziokwu-bu-ndu!’

Soon, the women came to join them.

From the louvered window, Ada and her friends peeped at Obinna. He stood now with his best friends, Obiozo, Uche and Ahanna.

He was talking and Ada wondered what he was saying, if it was about her. She was surprised to realize he was different today; he looked different.

She saw him differently. The fact that he was going to become her husband that day created an aura of respect, esteem.

‘You are marrying the best, Ada,’ Nwamaka said, in that tone of voice that showed she was both happy for her and jealous.

Ada turned to look at her. ‘But he doesn’t have money,’ she said, yet not appearing to be sad.

‘Did you say money?’ Ujunwa threw in. ‘Who is talking about money these days again? Haven’t our girls all tried it and saw it led nowhere? Happiness is the main thing, my friend. Obinna will make you happy.’

Nwamaka nodded fully, indicating her full support.

She understood, perfectly, for she had been a victim of ‘money marriage’ herself.

Azuka who had been sitting on the bed all the while they peeped got up. ‘I’m yet to understand how people can be truly happy in marriage without money though,’ she said.

They turned suddenly to her.

She looked unapologetic. ‘Yes,’ she affirmed. ‘You see, marriage is an expensive institution, like a company with workers, it needs money to grow. When there is no money, the workers can only stay a few weeks, months highest, before they revolt.’

They were staring at her.

‘I don’t believe you, Azuka!’ Ujunwa was first to speak. She wanted to continue in the same quick pace, but paused.

It was Azuka that has spoken; she needed to give a very reasonable reply to silence her completely, and also to stop Ada from thinking about it.

But Adaku was not any bothered. Not when it was about marrying Obinna. She had never been surer of anything her entire life.

She gave Azuka a small smile. ‘I think, Azu, that when the owners of the company are bonded enough, they will always work something out.’

Her eyes lingered on Azuka, her lips still slightly curved in the smile.

Azuka flattened her cheeks and did not say another word.

Soon, her mother knocked and said it was time for her to come out. She turned to her friends and they giggled with excitement. Except Azuka.

The trio hugged themselves before stepping out.

She was amazed at the crowd that had come. They had hoped it to be a small occasion, but then, it was an eating and drinking occasion.

There is a popular saying in Obeledu that you don’t know how many friends you have till you call a party.

She stood in the middle, hands folded in the front. Her friends stood behind her, smiling and shy.

One of the elders, Ichie Akunne, who was her father’s eldest brother, stood and called her. ‘Omalicha, come.’

She walked close to him and knelt.

Ichie Akunne poured out a glass of wine and gave to her. ‘Stand, my daughter. Go and show us your husband!’

‘Yes, nna anyi!’

‘And if he is not here, come back let us go to Nkwo and buy you a man,’ another elder said beside them, cackling.

Adaku stood and looked round.

He was easy to find. He smiled at her and her fingers around the cup quivered a little.

She started to move, one graceful step after another.

‘Omalicha!’

‘Asa mma!’

‘Elelebe eje oru!’

They were calling her, extending their hands in false desire.

Finally, she knelt before him, drank a little from the cup and handed it to him.

The crowd cheered.


FOUR

He came early to her house.

His trip was the next day. He’d promised to spend the entire day with her today.

As if that would change anything. But she had agreed anyway.

They went two trips to the borehole together. And then he helped her split wood.

He took the axe and she stood behind him, watching.

Each time he lifted the axe, his arms firm in the air as they clasped the tool, his left foot holding the wood secure to the ground, she thought about how much she was going to miss him, those arms, those thighs, his chest, his lips.

His touch.

And now he turned to her and smiled; that smile too—she quickly added that one. She bit her thumbnail off and hugged herself.

Her mother came out and smiled at the huge pile of firewood.

It was enough to last them a month. She thanked him and gave him a lump of dried meat from her stock.

He was putting it in his mouth when Ada jerked it off and ate it instead.

She was laughing as his face crumpled like he was going to cry.

‘Nnaa, don’t mind her,’ Uchechi told him. ‘There is another.’ She gave him another larger lump of meat.

He put it quickly into his mouth and flashed his tongue at Ada.

Ada stopped laughing.

Obinna started to laugh and she picked a stick from the ground and pursued him.

Uchechi was smiling and shaking her head.

Her family accepted him, and it wasn’t just because he frequently came around to help them with the firewood, or water or cut down their ripe palm fruits.

Or because he never collects money each time he carried Uchechi’s wares at the market, even when she insisted, aggressively so, sometimes forcing the note into this hand, he would still return it.

It was because he was hard working. And his family, though poor, was good.

Papa Adaku had once said to the wife, when the trouble of getting their daughter to see reason why she shouldn’t wait for someone so young for marriage seemed to overpower them, that in any case they should be happy at least that it was him, that ‘at least’ they are sure their daughter won’t die of hunger.

***

After she made jollof rice with the dry fish her mother brought out, they sat together under the shade of the mango tree at the other end of the backyard to eat.

He took a spoonful of the yellow rice, blew at it once and threw it into his mouth. ‘Aw!’ he screamed.’

‘What?!’

‘Oku!’

She frowned at him. She used her spoon and levelled the rice so that it cooled faster.

He picked a lump of fish from the plate and threw into his mouth.

She slapped his arm. ‘Mind yourself, Obinna.’

He liked the way she had called Obinna— quietly, affectionately, the failed attempt of someone who was only pretending to be angry.

There was silence for a while. Now his eyes were on her. She met his gaze and they held briefly, then she turned away. ‘So will you write me?’ she asked him.

‘No,’ he said.

Her eyes came wider. ‘You won’t? Why?’

‘I’m going to be very busy,’ he said.

‘Busy?’

‘Yes!’

‘With what?!’

‘Ha! You’ve not heard? Ahanna said the girls in Lagos never get satisfied. Like dogs, they keep asking for more, more, more and more!’

He looked and saw her expression. He felt amused but did not show it.

‘Ayi!’ He screamed when a glass of cold water splashed over his face.

She dropped the glass back on the table with force and carried the plate of food to herself.

‘Ada! Why did you pour water on me?’

She didn’t say a word, instead she began humming in the way little children do when they want to show they are eating something tasty.

He stared at her. He picked his spoon and tried to eat from the plate. She shifted. ‘Ok, now I can’t even eat?’

More humming. ‘Allow me to eat! Maybe you have not heard, the men in the university never get satisfied too. I must eat before they kill me.’

He was staring at her.

Such jokes got to him easier, she knew.

‘Oya, ndo—sorry!’ he said.

She nodded. ‘Better.’ She dropped the plate back on the table.

‘I will write you every week, inu?’ he said, his voice distorted by chewing.

She laughed instead, a dry ‘he-he-he’ chuckle that surprised him. ‘Who will even have time to read your letters when I will be busy with my studies in the university?’ she said.

Now he laughed, so loudly she stopped to stare at him. ‘What’s so funny?’ she asked.

He wanted to say something and then started on another bout of laughter.

‘Mkpi!’ she called him, her face swollen in a frown.

‘What do you know about the university?’ he came through at last. ‘Eh, Adaku Onochie, answer me?’

She rolled her eyes at him. ‘What do you mean by that?’

‘Do you know how many times you will even write JAMB before you finally get admission, eh? You think you just write one JAMB and fiam, you get admission, just like that. Look, let me tell you, you have to write JAMB at least four times—’ He put up four fingers in demonstration. ‘Ano! Four times, before you can even talk about getting admission.’

She turned her hand round her head and snapped at him. ‘If it is charm, it will not work for you!’

He laughed. ‘But, Ada, seriously, were you hoping you just write JAMB today and tomorrow you are a university student?’

‘Once I pass, I will get admission,’ she said.

‘Taa! Pass fire! Better go and ask Ukamaka your friend. She has written that JAMB more than five times and yet she is still here with us. I heard she now has her own special locker in the exam hall with her name on it. I’m sure this year, they will register her for free.’

She didn’t want to, but she laughed. Then she turned serious. ‘Am I as dumb as Ukamaka, gbo?’

He didn’t respond.

He was now staring at her.

At that moment it hit him what he was going to miss.

The love.

The friendship.

The laughter.

Tiny sands of fear settled on him.

He began to wonder if his trip would tell badly on their relationship. If it would spoil this wonderful union.

He thought of her in the university, a large compound filled with young boys; disco boys in their saggy jean trousers, broad T-shirts and bandanna, each trying to grab her as she sashayed through their middle, desperate to defile her.

To take away her glow and leave nothing for him.

Her voice jolted him back to life. ‘Obinna!’

He turned suddenly to her, looking lost.

‘What are you thinking about?’ she asked him.

‘Nothing.’ He said nothing quietly.

‘Don’t worry, I will wait,’ she said.

‘Mm, what did you say?’

‘I said I will wait for you.’

He was amazed she understood. No one knew him like she does.

‘I don’t trust university boys,’ he said.

‘I don’t trust Lagos girls either.’

‘Ha, you know I can’t do that.’

‘What if they keep asking for more, and more and more?’

He smiled and his dimples sank deep into his cheeks.

Later that evening, they went to the avocado tree and felt each other. It was intense, the deepest they’ve ever had, as though doing it that way would keep them satisfied till whenever they would meet again.




NAIRAJOKES.COM




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logics [Read it]


GIRL:IF I KN
EW U WERE DIS POOR I WOULDNT HHAVE MARRY U
BOY:WEN I SAID U WER D ONLI THIN I AV IN DIS WORLD WAT WERE U THINKIN


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-11 21:10:10

441 Views




Intelligence is like underwear, everyone should have it, but we shouldn’t show it off.Related

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
POEM BY
FRANK UCHE A.K.A ATTITUDE
Please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading...

Sorry for the things left untold.
As we watch our destinies unfold.
Determination and perseverance must we uphold.
If we much breakdown every stronghold.
:
Life isn't as easy as we were told .
For we stand alone in the fold.
If we must acquire silver & gold.
Our ego and pride must be sold.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
MY NAME IS FRANK UCHE AKA ATTITUDE AND I WROTE THIS POEM. THANKS FOR READING


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-10-10 23:29:05

194 Views




Akpors’ son, Junior, grew up and gained admission into the university and Akpors was so proud of him; he kept checking on him from time to time and advising him to not join any secret cult and stay out of trouble.
One day he called his son and said; “Hello son, I’m just watching the news now and there is crises in your school, where are you?”
Junior: I’m in my room papa.Akpors: Did you lock your doors?Junior: Yes.Akpors: That’s my Boy. By the way, what is the cause of the crisis?
Junior: Well, the school authorities increased our school fees from N27,000 to N127,000.
Akpors: WHATTTTTT? Wait my Son, I want you to tell me the truth. Where are you right now?
Junior: I am in my room right now na, I told you before.Akpors: (Angry) What?? ARE YOU STUPID?! Will you get out of that room and join the riot! If possible sef, kill somebody!!! If you stay there doing nothing, who do you think will pay that money


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-01-17 07:06:20

277 Views



Punishment [Read it]


A US Air Force C-141 was scheduled to leave Thule
Air Base, Greenland at midnight. During the pilot's
preflight check, he discovered that the aircraft's
latrine holding tank was still full from the last flight.
So a message was sent to the base, and an airman
who was off duty is called out to take care of it. The young man finally got to the air base and made
his way to the aircraft, only to find that the latrine
pump truck had been left outdoors and was frozen
solid, so he had to find another one in the hangar,
which takes even more time. He returned to the
aircraft and was less than enthusiastic about what he had to do. Nevertheless, he went about the
pumping job deliberately and carefully (and slowly)
so as to not risk criticism later. As he's left the plane, the pilot stopped him and
said, "Son, your attitude and performance has
caused this flight to be late, and I'm going to
personally see to it that you are not just
reprimanded, but punished." Shivering in the cold, his task finished, the airman
took a deep breath, stood up tall and said, "Sir, with
all due respect, I'm not your son; I'm an Airman in
the United States Air Force. I've been in Thule,
Greenland for 11 months without any leave, and
the reindeer are beginning to look pretty good to me. I have one stripe, it's two-thirty in the morning,
the temperature is 40 degrees below zero and my
job here is to pump sh*t from your aircraft. Now
just exactly what form of punishment did you have
in mind?"# www.facebook.com/9jastudentforum #AoN


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-15 11:53:24

570 Views




Apni Suhagrat Ko Pati Bechra Ache Tarike Se Chudai Nahi Kar Paaya



Subha Dulhe Ki Maa Ne Bahurani Se Puchha



Saas: “Bahu, Suhagrat Kaisi Rahi?“



Bahu Udasi Se: “Maa Ji Kya Batau, Grah Parvesh To 2 Baar Hua, Par Grah Shanti Nahi Ho Paayi“Related

Ek pathan ki shaadi ke 3 din baad uski patni boli, “Maine apse shaadi is liye ki hai ki humare bache hon, is liye nahi ke mujhe poty khul kar aaye.Related

*****continue part *****

I opened my eyes and stup them again,
i opened them again, my eyes felt heavy
but I tried header and they sluggishly
opened,i looked around trying to figure
out where I was,i know this wasn't my room,
i saw three figures standing close to me,
but their faces wasn't clear,"where am i"
i manage to say and it came with a lot of
pain,"he is awake "i heard one of them say,
i recognised that voice yes it was my mother,
every thing was now clear to me,my mother,
my dad and osaretin came to my bed,my
mother held my palm, "how are you feeling "
my dad asked me,i tryed to say something
but I just couldn't i was too tried
to speak, my dad sent osaretin to call
the someone, they didn't bother to ask
my any more questions because they
knew i was weak,i tryed to picture
where I was but the more I try to
think the more I felt pain at the side
of my head, a man in white coat maybe
a doctor and osaretin came in,thats
when i know i was in the hospital,
the doctor was a man maybe on his 50's,
he examine me "his heart beat is close
to normal, he will be fine, like I
said earlier no damage is involved ",
the doc said,he told my mother i
needed some food and also alot of
fruit,and left,"what happened " i
tryed getting up but I was held back
by the sharp pain that came from the
side of my head,"Arrrgh" i winced,
"don't try getting up you are not fit
to do that yet"my father said
helping me to lay dark on the bed,
"you don't remember what happened? ",
osaretin asked,i tryed to recall but it
was till black," i saw you laying unconscious
in your room and you were bleeding seriously,
you have a deep cut on your head,that was
two day ago,i thought i will lose you "
my mother said,"yes you have been unconscious
for two days now ", God that long,that was
when everything started to cone back,how
lmade came to my house and how i tryed to
force myself on her and how she hit me with
a bottle, i remember falling on the ground
and her voice screaming my name was the
last thing I remember before i opened my
eyes here,i looked at osaretin and he
seems to understand what my look was
all about,i know i can't tell me parents
what really happened so I have to come up
with an explanation but right now i was not
getting any "mam don't you think he needs
some food now " osaretin burst out,i felt
relieved at least that will buy me time to
think of something to say,osaretin is really
a life saver,my mother quickly left to get
somethings prepared for me,my father later
left saying he need to go back to work
because he took an excuse at his work
to come check on me,leaving just me and
osaretin, immediately my father left
osaretin started asking for a real
explanation, i told him everything that
happened, he was very angry that lmade could
do that to me and didn't even Try to save me,
if not that my mum came back early only God
knows what could have happens to me.
I stayed some days in the hospital before
i was discharge, all my stay in the hospital
osaretin, osazee and osayewenre never
stop to visit me,my siblings wasn't left
out of course you know my parents was
always there especially my mum,but
there was till one person left,lmade,
yes I was hoping she could come visit me
after putting me in that condition,i know
i tryed to rape her but I didn't but she
tryed to kill me,even if it was to defend
herself or not,like osaretin said she could
atleast try to save me,i felt angry inside
and i so wanted to get back at her.

NEXT PART 13


Mr. Smith went to the Doctor`s office to collect his wife`s test results.

Receptionist: “I`m sorry, sir, but there has been a bit of a mix-up and we have a problem. When we sent the samples from your wife to the lab, the samples from another Mrs. Smith were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your wife`s. Frankly, that`s either bad or terrible.”


Mr. Smith: “What do you mean?”


Receptionist: “Well, one Mrs. Smith has tested positive for Alzheimer disease and the other for AIDS. We cannot tell which is your wife.”


Mr. Smith: “That`s terrible! What am I supposed to do now?”


Receptionist: “The doctor recommends that you drop your wife off in the middle of town and if she finds her way home, don`t go to bed with her!Related

Check out this pic yourself and drop your comment.....









NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-18 13:59:44

230 Views




A Lion and Lioness were sitting in their den in the jungle when a Monkey climbed up a nearby tree and started insulting the Lion. The Lioness started to get angry and said, ”King of the jungle, how dare you allow this small monkey to insult you? You must punish him.”

The Lion replied, ”You are right, but you know what? I am the king of the jungle and I must not lower myself to his level. I am ignoring him.”

The Lioness, astonished, sat in silence. Yet the monkey kept on insulting the Lion, calling him all kinds of names. After sometime, the Lioness lost her patience. She shouted, ”I cannot allow this any longer. I am going to teach that monkey a lesson!”

So the Lioness chased after the Monkey. After a long chase, she found herself out of the jungle and at a construction site. She saw the monkey going through a narrow pipe and leapt in after him. The pipe apparently was not large enough, and the lioness got stuck.

Seeing that the lioness is stuck, the monkey walked around behind her. The monkey made jest of her, saying, ”Who is a bad girl? Who is a bad girl?!!!”



He yelled as he kicked her buttocks anyhow. The monkey continued for a few minutes and then finally left with a big smile on his face.

After a long struggle for an hour, the lioness finally freed herself from the pipe. Injured, and completely embarrassed, she returned home to the jungle to her king.

As she got back, the Lion asked, “So how did the chase go?”

The lioness couldn’t look at him. The Lion said, ”Aaaahhhh!!!! He took you to the construction site didn’t he?”


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-20 10:46:36

563 Views




On a crowded bus, Banta noticed that Santa had his eyes closed. “What’s the matter? Are you sick?” he asked.
“No, I’m okay. It’s just that I hate to see old ladies standing”, replied Santa.Related

“what? Marriage?” i asked with a shiver. Jboy
nodded saying nothing.
“alright, cool i don’t mind nor care. Just do
whatever necessary to get me out of here” i murmured with resignation.
“are you sure about it?” he asked curiously,
standing up.
“just get me out of here” i answered with a frown.
“very well then. I have to go bring Mary. Just
stay put, i’ll beg the officers to let you stay here and wait for me” he said, tapped my left shoulder
and hurried out. I sighed as i watched him leave.
“how on earth will i marry that old witch. Hmmm
well let me get out of here first” i reasoned with
an evil smile.
It really was a long wait as i eagerly waited for jboy to return. Thanks to the food he brought for
me. My energy returned, giving me a chance to
reason very well.
It took him two hours to show up, two long hours
it was. My eyes lightened up with relief as i saw
him walk into the room with the lady i saw with Mary the previous day.
“where is Mary?” i anxiously asked Jboy who
quickly shrugged, saying nothing.
“i’m Mary’s elder sister. I’m here on her behalf
against my wish” The pretty old lady said coldly.
I breathed deeply, giving her full attention. “How could you?. Why do you guys with money
think you can manipulate and defile every girl you
see?. We might be poor but my sister is precious
to me. Can you imagine the misery and agony you
put her through with your murderous act?. She
couldn’t believe her fears until she took three different tests which produced awful results.
Everything is documented, we have given the
police a copy, i guess you need yours” she poured
out, fetching an envelope from her handbag.
“madam please calm down. I know i erred but
she shouldn’t have involved the police. We are lovers, planning to get married” i pleaded
solemnly, but my plea infuriated her more.
“shut up. Don’t just go there. If you guys are
about getting married, why drug and kill the baby
she’s carrying. A gift from God. A terrible sin in
the eyes of God and Man, oh you will burn in hell” she shouted angrily, while Jboy cleverly held her
hand, begging her to calm down.
“remember what we discussed with Mary earlier?.
My friend is willing to proceed with the marriage
formalities as soon as possible. Mary also agreed
to drop the case because of it. Please let’s forget the past and do the right thing” Jboy pleaded.
“i don’t just know what came over Mary to give
her consent to this rubbish marriage thing. Well
let’s go meet the officer incharge of the case” she
hissed, eyed me and left with Jboy who happily
winked at me as they left. I murmured quick prayers.
“at last. Thank you God” i breathed. I couldn’t
wait to get out of my nightmare.
Jboy showed up moments later with a smile on
his face.
“the case has been closed, but the A.S.P
wants to see you” he said happily.
I breathed deeply, so happy and relieved. I quickly stood up and shook his hand.
“Thank’s for everything” i said with deep
happiness. Mary’s sister showed up that moment
with her usual cold look.
“i guess you are happy huh?. You still have God’s
wrath to face. I’m leaving” she said with a dry hiss and turned to leave. I gently approached her.
A mark of remorse on my face.“i’ll come over to
see Mary as soon as i leave this place. I have to
atone for my sins.
Thank you for setting me free” i poured out like
an innocent child. She eyed me,breathed deeply and left the room.
“good show bro. Now let’s go see the officer”
Jboy said with a happy smile. I nodded and
followed him to the A.s.p’s
office. The level of my happiness that moment
was clearly enormous. “sit down gentlemen” A.s.p Tunde murmured
seriously as we walked into his office. His mood
dark and heavy. I couldn’t
imagine what was wrong with him.“i hope you are
not thinking of leaving here today?” he asked me
curiously. I stared back at him, unable to say anything. Jboy was
equally as surprised as i was.
“it’s glad to know that you have finally convinced
your girlfriend to drop the case.
But remember i still have the test results and as
an officer of the law i have every right to carry on with the case, even if Mary objects. The crime you
commited wasn’t only against Mary but against
the state.
Abortion is illegal and often treated as a murder
case. So my friend you know what you are up to”
the annoying officer addressed us intelligently. I felt like exploding. I
was extremely fed up.
“oh gracious me!. C’mon officer this is so unfair.
Why are you doing this?” jboy shouted angrily.
The officer merely scoffed and said nothing.
“you are not a foreigner. You know how we close cases in Nigeria. Enough of the grammer” he said
with his eyes on me. Jboy
quietly sat down as he realised were the officer
was going.
“ok sir please help us” i pleaded desperately.
“i once asked for a million, but as it is now just get me two hundred thousand” he said, his greedy
eyes still on me. I instantly knelt down, surprising
him with my action.
“i’m diabetic sir. I won’t survive another night in
here. Last night i merely survived a crisis. I badly
need to see my doctor. Please ask for something reasonable” i begged without shame while Jboy
speechlessly gasped at me.
The officer thought for a while before
shrugging.“alright get me a hundred thousand. A
bank is across the street. I hope you have an
ATM?” he demanded, throwing a look at Jboy who quickly sprang up.
__
An hour later, i was in Jboy’s car heading back to
my apartment,finally free, but not entirely free. I
still had Mary to deal with. I had chioma to win
back.

>>

The officer in charge of the operation radioed in the other two groups and gave them the situation report and the next line of action of pursuit. This was done as we sped to get to the lane where the KIA was on. He radioed the station and told them to look out for the car as it was heading in their direction. I was excited that my plan worked. I found them. I immediately became worried as to how this could end. It appeared the police were more interested in capturing the criminal than saving the 'hostage'. I could only pray and hope all end well. My hope was that the traffic around the traffic light ahead would stop them but i was shocked when i saw the car swing into the oncoming traffic in the opposite lane to beat the traffic light. It went west, passing in front of the police post. We were still the closest van to it, though it was eating up the asphalt giving a gap we still weren't able to bridge. I could sense where it was headed - the nearest entry point to the expressway. I told the officer beside me. The risen was blaring as were those of the other vans that had joined the pursuit. He radioed in my suggestion with the caution that as the leading van he'll notify them if he was wrong.
He wasn't.
.
Pursuit on the highway was dangerous. I was scared. For TD and for me. The KIA was heading in the Lagos direction of the highway and at IWO Road, went Ife-ward.
.
How exactly were they planning to stop this speeding car? Just keep TD safe, i prayed to God. I glanced backward and could count five vans behind us with blasting sirens. I hoped there would be some traffic to stop it, there was none. A van overtook ours. I know the road quite well. We were almost entering Osun state. Once we crossed the bridge over the water from the dam, we would be in another state.
.
I heard three sharp cracks. They were from the van ahead of us. I thought i saw the KIA careen off the road, it came back. And careened again. That was when i saw that a tire had burst. It was veering off and returning but it didn't stop. There were just the KIA and the police van ahead of us on the stretch of that road, all other vehicles had slowed down and dropped behind. No-one wanted to be caught in the chase.
.
"Noooooo!" I screamed as i saw it head for the bridge, drunkenly. On the bridge, the worst happened. It veered off violently. The rails couldn't stop it completely. It was now in a cantilever position, more off the bridge, little of it on it. The lead van zoomed past the car and could only stop at the other end of the bridge. I could see the officers jump out immediately and run to the car that was most parts off the bridge. They were leaning on the trunk trying to hold it from falling into the rushing waters below. We got there and stopped. I could see the dam was open and the water rushed madly. The car had few places to hold it. The body was too sleek to be gripped. A few hands held the back doors handles while others pressed down on the trunk. It seemed the doors where jammed or shut from inside. The driver was bobbing on his seat, his head on the steering. TD was slumped on the back seat. The most amazing scene was of Tango. He sat straight, staring ahead, his arms folded across his chest. He made no effort to open the doors.
.
Somebody rammed the stock of his rifle on the window by TD's side and reached his hand to open the door from inside. Tango just watched on. The car appeared really eager to continue its downward journey because it appeared not to have moved an inch in the direction of the bridge. As the door opened, those holding it let it go and reached out for TD. My heart was in my mouth as they gingerly and very carefully dragged his unconscious form. The positioning was awkward. He was actually off the bridge so that the cops reaching out for him had to be held by other cops across their mid sections so they could use their two hands. They pulled him out while Tango watched. As they dragged TD away from the car, my eyes were on him but i caught the movement out of the corner of my eyes - Tango reaching for the open door and leaping into the raging waters below.
.
Headlong. Though the water was rushing madly, it was the force of release from the dam that was responsible, it was still a quite shallow with a very rocky bed.
Tango's head hit the rock smack. For there was a reddish tint around his body as the water dragged it down stream. In an instinctive response to the jumping Tango, most of the officers holding down the car let go of it and it immediately plunged into the water below. It seemed the water felt nothing drop into it as it continued its mad downstream motion, carrying car and man with it.
.
I caught the last sight of the car and Tango as i knelt over TD's inert form. His breathing was strained, but he was breathing. A piece of paper stuck out from his shirt's pocket. I pulled it out. It was titled: The Fortuitous Meeting.
.
THE END.
Thanks guys for following till the end. Do have a blast.


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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1.You apply perfume cause you wan
snap pic.
2.You wan use fork to drink garri. .
.BROO nawa o! 3.You wan climb my Naira_jokes wall so
you would see what i'm doing inside. . .
. .
4.You kneel down cause you wan greet
person for phone.
5.You are above 35 and wizkid and koredo bello is your role model. . . .My
brother Your enemies are at work!!
6.It took me an hour to form and
reform my msg,you come reply with
"K". . . .Are you asking to be punched?
7.You reduce volume of your T.v set cause you wan open your whatsapp
msg.
8.You dey smile cause who senior you
greet you.
9.You dey give N20 as church offering
but you dy use your life savings gamble. 10.You no get shi-shi for account,you
dey follow p-square sing "Chop my
money" instead of "Mercy Mercy oh
lord!!"
Lolll
11.You know get mind toast girl,you dey follow eminem sing"Ahm not
afraid"
Hehehe. . . .My broda your case dy High
court.
12.You be troublemaker for your area
you dey follow dakolo sing"Wish me well"
Truly Truly your case dy ifa's office.
13.You never sit for jamb once for your
life yet you dn give your bae
registration fee for six years. . . . .OGA
you be scholarship board!! 14.If you read this post and didn't
comment,please try and visit the
nearest hospital for examination.
#BOLLY_SMART™®


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-04-18 16:57:46

288 Views




khud par Sabse Jyada proud kab hota hai ?

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.

.

.

Jab usko Exam mein kuch na aata ho, Aur pichhe se teacher aake kahe,

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Copy chhupa lo Pichhe wala dekh raha hai…. Kasam se seena chaura ho jata hai :’DRelated

A Priest was being honoured
at his retirement dinner after
25 years in the parish.
The leading local politician
was chosen to make the
presentation and to give a
little speech at the dinner.
However, he was late, so the
Priest decided to say his own
few words while they waited.
He commenced with: “Thank
Goodness we Catholics have
a wonderful sense of
humour! I got my first
impression of this parish
from the very first
confession I ever heard
here. I thought I had been
assigned to a terrible place.
The very first person who
entered my confessional told
me he had stolen a television
set and, when questioned by
the police, was able to lie his
way out of it. He had stolen
money from his parents,
embezzled from his
employer, had an affair with
his boss’s wife, had s e x
with his boss’s 17 year old
daughter on numerous
occasions, taken illegal
drugs, had several
homosexual affairs, was
arrested several times for
public nudity. I was appalled
that one person could do so
many awful things. But as the
days went on, I learned that
my people were not all like
that and I had, indeed, come
to a fine parish full of good
and loving people.”
Just as the Priest finished
his talk, the politician arrived
full of apologies at being late.
He immediately began to
make the presentation and
gave his talk:
“I’ll never forget the first
day our parish Priest
arrived,” said the politician.
“In fact, I had the honour of
being the first person to go
to him for confession.”
Moral: Never, Never, Never
Be Late!
#CtB



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-11-13 08:21:26

542 Views




She – “can I ask you something ?”

Me –
*gets excited*
*thinks life is fair to me*
*breathes deeper*
“Yes ?”

She – “Mobile Karbonn luun ya Lava ka ?”Related

In 1988, Canadian sprinter Ben Johnson broke the Olympic and World record in the 100 metres, but was subsequently disqualified after it was discovered that he had used anabolic steroids to enhance his performance. His record was expunged and the gold medal was instead awarded to American Carl LewisRelated

a very successful naija man parked his new lexus in front of his office ready to show it off to his collegues, as he got out a trailer passed too close and completety tore off the door, the man immediately grabbed his cell phone, called the police, and they arrived. before the officer could say anything the man was scereaming hysteriacally, my lexus!, my lexus!, will never be the same again no matter what the panel -beater did to it, the officer just loked at the man in disgust and shook his head, i cant beleieve how materialistic you are, he said, you are soo focused on your possessions that you dont notice anything else. how can you say such a thing? asked the man. dont you know that your left arm is missing from your elbow down, it must have been torn off when the truck hit you..........., oh my God replied the man, "MY ROLEX" wrist watch.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-24 18:56:48

418 Views




INSECTS EPISODE 1

They are little small creatures,on/in soil and water,some you can see and some you can't see,some are hidden,some are visible,some are large, some are small,some are deadly,some are friendly.the world of this little creatures are of mystery, wonders and excitement,but fear,strength and weakness runs in the world of the insect....................................
(WRITER TALKING):"deep down under the soil life was in another dimension,soil was the aim of shelter against predictors and it was also a feeding source for predictors. lifelessness gave life, and life gave shelter,and shelter brought food,and food gave resistance to death".....now let us zoom in on the world of insects...........
(WRITER TALKING):"a forage ant was moving along the soil,moving from side to side,using its antennae for track and trace navigation,its antennae pointed it to a direction which it quickly followed,its antennae jogged notifying the ant that a meal is available in front of him,the meal was a grub(maggot) which was wiggling on its own,the grub(maggot)was going to where it could rest,the ant quickly climbed the grub(Maggot) from behind".
Grub (maggot):"hy back of me,I ain't gonna be your meal",said the maggot trying to knock off the little ant on its back as it wiggled.....

Hmmmmm all this people claiming to know much where are they?
Abeg come fix this missing words with either YES or NO

ALERT: my New track releasing soon... Keep ya finger cross. @iamBreny







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-01-27 09:35:47

330 Views




A boy was in bed dehydrated, so he decided to ask his father in the sitting room to get him some water


SON: Dad, can you get me some water please.
DAD: No! Go to sleep.
SON: But am thirsty, please just a cup
DAD: Not another word from you or I will come in there and spank you!
SON: Dad!
DAD: [Frustrated] Yes!
SON: While you're coming to spank me could you bring the water.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-12-04 04:40:01

150 Views



happy new month [Read it]


Conversation Between A Dying Father (JUNE) And His Son (JULY)
.
JUNE: My son I'm tired.
JULY: Why?
JUNE: My time is up, I will be going to join your forefathers.
JULY: I know, your time is over... I will miss you Dad.
JUNE: Let me tell you some things before I go.
JULY: What is it Dad?
JUNE: Please when I go, make sure you take care of this person.
JULY: Who?
JUNE: The person READING this conversation of ours.
JULY: Okay.
JUNE: I made some promises to this person during my reign, I fulfilled some, and some I couldn’t.
JULY : But why couldn’t you fulfill all dad?
JUNE : Well, my son time and human factors affected some of the promises....
JULY : But...
JUNE : But surely, I spoke with God on this
person's behalf, and God granted my wish that you may fulfill the rest promises that I
couldn't. So these are the rest of the fulfillment you will carry out on this person.
JULY : Go on dad.
JUNE : Stabilize this person's health all through your reign there shall be no sickness! Open a direct link between
God and this person.
JULY : Done, carry on Dad.
JUNE : Ensure that this person's dreams come to reality within the shortest period of time.
JULY : Alright.
JUNE : Give this person wealth that will touch lives of multitudes.
JULY : Surely.
JUNE : Make sure that you remove all remaining hindrances to success from this person's way and make the year a huge
success.
JULY: I will dad, no problem!
JUNE : Pay more emphasis on the advice of this person's friends, don't worry about that of this person's enemies, God will take care of that! Get it?
JULY: Yes
JUNE: Finally, promise me that when your own time is up, you will instruct this to your offspring after offspring (JUNE
& The others) to keep positive fulfillment of this person going!
JULY : Yes dad, may God help me!
JUNE : Now I can pass to the beyond happily! May you be prosperous!!!
JULY: Amen.
.
TYPE A VERY BIG AMEN IF YOU BELIEVE YOU WILL SEE THE MONTH OF JULY 2015 WITH ALL THIS PRAYERS
:
:


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-01 09:06:55

274 Views




Santa complained to the police, ‘Sir, all the items are missing, except the TV in my house.’

Police: How’s that the thief did not take the TV?

Santa: I was watching TV news.Related

Four Legs [Read it]


Wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two! She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. 


As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. "Hi darling", he says, "your parents have come to visit us, so I let them stay in our bedroom. Hope you have said hello to them."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-12-08 06:15:02

114 Views




One day, Akpos who was in primary three, approached his teacher. Akpos said, "M’am, I should be in primary four, I’m smarter than my sister and she’s in the primary four."

The M’am (Teacher) had heard enough of his complaints and took Akpos to the Principal’s office. She explained everything to the Principal who decided to test Akpos with some questions that a primary four pupil should know.

PRINCIPAL: What’s 3 + 3?
AKPOS: 6!
PRINCIPAL: 6 + 6?
AKPOS: 12!

And so on...

The Principal asked the boy many questions and Akpos got them right. The Principal then asked M’am to send Akpos to primary four. M’am decided to ask some more questions and the Principal agreed.

M’AM: What does a cow have four of, that I’ve only two of?
AKPOS: Legs!
M’AM: What’s in your pants that you have but I don’t have?
AKPOS: Pockets!
M’AM: What starts with a C and ends with T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
AKPOS: Coconut!
M’AM: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

The principal’s eyes open really wide, but before he could stop the answer, the boy was taking charge.

AKPOS: Bubble Gum!
M’AM: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up, I get wet before you do. What am I?
AKPOS: Tent!

The principal was looking restless.

M’AM: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you’re bored. The best man always has me first and what am I?
AKPOS: Wedding Ring!
M’AM: I come in many sizes. When I’m not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good?
AKPOS: Nose!
M’AM: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates, I come with a quiver?
AKPOS: Arrow!
M’AM: What starts with ‘F’ and ends with a ‘K’ and if you don’t get it, you have to use your hand?
AKPOS:Fork!
M’AM: What’s it that all men have, it’s longer in some men than others, the Pope doesn’t use his and a man gives it to his wife after marriage?
AKPOS: Surname!
M’AM: What part of the man has no bone, but has muscles with a lot of veins like pumping and is responsible for making love?
AKPOS: Heart!

The principal heaved a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Send Akpos to the University! I got the last ten questions wrong myself!"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-10-31 08:12:07

309 Views




Akpos enter a bus and sits next to a Nun (christian girl) in the front seat.

Akpos looks over and asks the Nun if she would have sex with him.

The girl, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at
the next stop.

When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to Akpos
"If you
want, I can tell you how you can get that girl to have sex with you."

Akpos of course says that he'd love to know, so the driver
tells him that every
Tuesday evening at midnight the girl goes to the
cemetery to pray to the lord.

"If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the driver,
"You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex
with you."

Akpos decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the
cemetery and waits for the girl

Right on schedule, the girl shows up. While she's in the middle of
praying,
Akpos walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a
mask of god.
"I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them
but you must have sex with me first," he says.

The girl agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity.

Akpos agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the girl.
After Akpos finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha,
I'm Akpos! the guy u meet in the bus "
The girl replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm a gay, the
bus driver!"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-03-27 08:46:10

8718 Views




A Desi girl texts to her friend: Pata Nahi Kyun Boys Inbox Mein Mujhe ‘Tongue’ Karte Rehte Hein!Related

Laughing moment [Read it]


U collect babe number u use "chick" store em. Shey en mama na fowl? :>
• U buy suya ur woman chop all the meat finish u con dey smile dey chop the onion, u be vegetarian?

• U dey wit ur guy & u dey receive diff kinds of phone calls every 5
min, yet u dey claim say u no dey cheat on ur guy. My sista, u be MTN
customer care agent?

• U ask a
girl for what she wants, she tells you money and you are angry. Were you
expecting her to say wisdom & understanding?
• Ur mates pay complete fare, sit down comfortably 4 bus, u pay half dey stand n smile. Bros u b usher?

• Since last 2 weeks, PHCN never remember ur street n una no get common
Tiger gen, yet u come my house still dey borrow Jackie Chan film from
me...bros na PHCN office u wan go watch am?
• U have 8 tribal marks, stretch marks scattered all ova ur body yet u still want a tattoo...ah! my friend u be zebra..
• U dey snap inside different type of cars yet u expect ur man to believe u are not cheatin..aunty,u be mechanic?
• U gather different gals picture for ur fone & yet u xpect ur gal to believe u are not cheatin.. uncle, u be photographer?
• He gave u an engagement ring for over five years, e never marry u, my dear u be lord of d rings?
You Can Also Add Yours.....lols, just for fun



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-09-21 14:43:20

137 Views




It is the woman who chooses the man who will choose herRelated

There was a preacher who fell in the ocean
and he couldn't swim. When a boat came by,
the captain yelled, "Do you need help, sir?"
The preacher calmly said "No, God will save
me." A little later, another boat came by and
a fisherman asked, "Hey, do you need help?"
The preacher replied again, "No God will
save me." Eventually the preacher drowned
& went to heaven. The preacher asked God,
"Why didn't you save me?" God replied,
"Fool,I sent you two boats!"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-09-03 02:26:41

470 Views




lolz,, I slapped a soldier man this
morning and he ran away,,that was how i
knew he was fake.
My beloved group fans,,pls lets join our
hands and espose all those fake
soldiers...
i guess u are asking HOW do u do that?
Yes its simple...just slap any soldier man
u see anytime,,any day,,anywere...u will
know if he is fake soldier or not. #oYo #SawThisDecidedToShare #B-goF #AoN


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-07-29 10:35:23

506 Views




“Hello!” Remilekun waves and smiles at Debby.
She flashes a wave back with a forced smile.
I suppose Remilekun never observes that cold response because she diverts her eyes to the surrounding of my sitting room. And I can see a big smile on her face as she does.
“This place aint bad, after all.” Remilekun says, arching her left hand with pride. On her face I perceive a look that suggests, “It’s manageable; just for the mean time.”
Now my eyes begin to survey Remilekun’s dressing the same way her eyes had surveyed my sitting-room. I think she has a great sense of fashion. She is cladded in a skirt and armless blouse that are made up of ankara and a glamorous European stuff. The purple dress matches her handbag and her high-heels. She is blessed with a robust butt and perfect hips.
“Show me around!” She says.
She walks abreast of me while crossing her arm into mine as if somebody is about to snatch me away from her.
“Is that your sibling you told me about?” She asks me as I show her the kitchen.
“No. she is not around,” I say with a look of assurance, “That girl is her best friend. She only came to shelter herself here till the rain stops.”
“I see,” she says, nodding her head.
I can tell from her facial expression that she noticed the girl’s bad manner.
“What did you see?” I ask blankly.
“Never mind.” She wears a naughty smile, moving around to survey the kitchenware.
“You know I am still managing this flat until probably two months’ time.”
“Yes. I understand,” she takes a sigh, “anyway, can I take a shower?”
The question sounds to me like a rhetorical question. Who am I to say NO to such a honorable request?
“Yes, why not?” I say with a welcoming smile.
She must be a carefree lady. Otherwise how can a woman request to bathe in a man’s house on the first visit! I wonder if I should ask her if she hadn’t bathed in her house in the morning, but I dare not. It is indeed a pleasure to me.
“But … I have prepared your delicacies. You need to check them out after shower.”

>>

eyes water [Read it]


akpos-sir
Oga-get my visitor an ice water
Akpos-ok sir
After 10 minutes akpos has not returned
Oga-akpos!!!,what are you still doing,get me the ice water now
Akpos-the cup has not full
Oga-what do you mean.is there no ice water again
Akpos-there is ice water,but i have been crying since and the has not full
ONE WORD FOR AKPOS PLEASe


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-25 02:33:19

403 Views




An example of men’s inability to understand women:

She: I have nothing to wear.

He: Awesome!Related

JOKE PART 12 BY DINDY

Girl: Dindy let's play a game.
Dindy: awesome!.
Girl: It's called challenge for the mastermind.
Dindy: Sweet....
Girl: If you get it right, I will give you a tight long hug.
Dindy: Great!!!!.
Girl: I'm an 8 letter word
First 4 letters is a question
2,3,4 protects our head
5,6,7 is a liquid in tree
7,8 are same letters
*WHAT AM I*.
Dindy: The answer is simple.
Dindy: you are a caterpillar you just made me understand you have many legs!.....lol.
#DINDY WROTE THIS
Facebook username: Ossy Andy Nnamdi
Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433
Watch out for part 13.



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-09-16 18:27:10

180 Views



Salaries [Read it]


SALARIES
These are the names of different salaries...
1. Onion Salary – You grab it, you open it, and you cry.
2. Storm Salary – You don’t know when it’s coming or going.
3. Menstrual Salary – It comes once a month and lasts only four days.
4. Magic Salary – You touch it and it disappears.
5. Amnesia Salary – You can’t remember what you spent it on.
6. Time Traveling Salary – You spend it paying various debts even before you collect it.
Which one have you ever experienced?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-12-22 17:45:07

334 Views




An Armed Robber invaded Akpos' house
one night and threatened to inject him
with blood containing HIV virus if he
didn't give him all the money he
collected from the bank that afternoon. ''Are you going to leave me with the
money if I allow you to inject me with
the HIV virus?'' Akpos asked. ''I will not collect the money and I will
leave you.'' The Armed Robber said. On hearing this, Akpos told the armed
robber to give him five minutes and he
went into his bedroom. When he came
back from the bedroom, he told the
robber to inject him with the HIV virus. The robber was stunned, but he did as
Akpos asked and left. Immediately he left, Akpos' wife
became worried, ''What the hell did you
just do?!'' She asked. "Akpos replied, ''Don't mind that silly
robber, he doesn't know that when I
went into my bedroom, I went in to
wear a condom."
#BOLLY_SMART™®


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-09-15 10:33:58

276 Views



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