Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:


In the morning bruno taxi driver wake early to find something to feed his family

As usual an expected day in his life came little money was made in addition it was month end that he has to pay lent

Night came when he thought to drive to night clubs where people drink beer
after he arrived he took a rest

An expected thing happened
he saw three men looks have taken much beer and they were indeed dizzy but they were moving towards him

"hie taxi drive are you a gent or a lady?"many stupid questions like these were given to him
"we are going home & we want you to take us home" one told bruno this

"Its 200 $$ each" bruno replied but he wasn't know the condition of his car
they all entered in the car and right away the car denied to start the engene
he tried many times but nothing seem to work

he wanted to report the problem to them but they were all asleep he awaken them
one suddenly slaped bruno & gave him 600 $$ & said he was driving in bumpy & hump areas while the car wasn't move







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-28 09:43:16

1083 Views




COMING SO SOON ......... THE IRONY OF LIFE







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Akpos war film [Read it]


Akpos, a movie director, was determined to make the greatest war movie ever filmed and the film was to contain the greatest battle scene ever filmed.

“I will use two armies.” he said “They’ll be huge twenty-five thousand extras on each side.”

“But how will we pay off the fifty thousand actors?” murmured his assistant.

“That’s the best part of my plan” replied Akpos. “We’ll use real bullets.”


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-11-19 08:33:16

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Science class [Read it]


The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes, the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, four minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude?" After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess u want to eat alone. Stingy woman"


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2015-03-04 06:51:00

312 Views




Lol laugh and share











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2015-03-10 08:24:43

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The legal age of consent to have sex in Argentina is 12.Related

Banta ko ek Lawaris bandar Mila. Woh us bandar ko Police Station le gaya aur pucha ki iska kya karun?


Inspector ne kaha Isko Zoo le jao.


Next day Inspector ne Banta ko Bandar k saath bus stop per dekha.


Inspector: Arre tum isko Zoo nahi le kar gaye..??


Banta: Kal gaye the Sir, khub ghoome, bada maza aaya… Aaj Qutub minar jaa rahe hai… Phir India Gate jayenge.Related

Yoga Asanas for a fantastic LIFE:

Inhale the future without any Expectation;

Hold the present for as long as possible;

And Exhale the past without any Regret!Related

A friend is the one who takes all the trouble of putting you into trouble and then troubles himself by steering you out of trouble!Related


Maxwell, Mr and Mrs uche arrived at the big black gate of Jonathan's mansion, they knocked at the gate and one of the security opened the gate.

Security :yes good morning who are you looking for

Mr uche :good morning,please we are looking for some one by name chidi

Security :are you on appointment

Mr uche :no but you can get him inform that amara parents want to see him

The security close the gate,in not less then five minutes he came back and ushered them in,he directed them to the entrance door,they were fill with amazement, the compound was full with armies who were guarding the place,they did a security check up on them before another amry took them to the house, on getting there one of the maid welcome them to the sitting room,they all sat down while the maid,the maids offered them some drinks and left,after about 30 minutes they were already getting tired of waiting for just one person, they wondered how long it will take him to answer them,the maids came back that moment.

Maid :please you all should come with me.

Mrs uche :but where is he ne

Maid :he will meet you up where you are going now . please come with me.

They had no choice but to follow the maid who lead them to another sitting room,they met Mrs Jonathan waiting for them,they exchange a pleasant greetings,they were two soldiers with her.

Mrs Jonathan :please sit down

Mr Jonathan :thank you.

They all sat down.

Mrs Jonathan :i was informed that so people were looking for my son chidi and i wonder what connection he have with elderly people like you so i decided to speak to you first, please kindly introduce yourself and the business with my son.

Mr uche :first of all thank you very much for allowing us to your house and accepting to speak with us,my name is Mr uche and this is my wife and he is my son inlaw, we came to see chidi your son because of an issue, Amara my daughter is nowhere to be found and we know that chidi knows her whereabouts because they are really close, so that is why we decided to ask him if you will give us the information we seek, or better still if she has called him to tell him where she is,that's all.

Mrs Jonathan :you do think my son will know her where about

Mrs uche :please you are a mother like me,you should understand what I am passing through, please why don't you help us to ask him just for confirmation, i beg you.

Mrs Jonathan :it's okey i will send for him,you

Pointing at one of the soldier

Mrs Jonathan :go call chidi

The soldier obey and left

Mrs uche :thank you very much

Mrs Jonathan smiled

Mrs Jonathan :no problem

Just then the soldier return with chidi,chidi was surprise to see them,he didn't recognises Mr and Mrs uche but he does know maxwell and that was the last person he wanted to see.

Chidi:mum you sent for me

Chidi sat down

Mrs Jonathan :do you know these people

Chidi :just one of them

Mrs Jonathan :they came to look for you consigning their daughter, what's her name again

Maxwell :amara

Mrs Jonathan :amara, do you know where she is

chidi was surprise to saw Mrs and Mrs uche that was his first time he was meeting them.

Chidi :amara is your daughter

Mr uche :yes

Mrs uche :chidi ,can I call you that

Chidi:sure

Mrs uche :please if you know where amara is tell us so that we can see how she is fairing

Chidi :well am sorry I can't help you,i don't know where she is .

Maxwell got angry because he knows chidi was lieing.

Maxwell :you lier,you know where she is and you are hiding her

Chidi :maxwell mind the way you speak to me,have you forgotten you are in my house.

Mrs Jonathan :chidi tell me,do you have any idea of what they are talking about.

Chidi looked at his mother,he can't lie to her.

Chidi :yes mum i do

Mrs Jonathan :where is she

Chidi :am sorry mum i just can't tell you,she is safe

Mrs uche :so you know where she is

Chidi :yes I do,so what makes you think i will tell you are location after all you made her go through

Mrs Jonathan :chidi,let all this stop now, if you know where the girl is kindly tell them

Chidi:mum i can't do that

This got mr uche angry,he then raise his voice on chidi

Mr uche :you are holding my daughter and you are till proving right over it,and you dare say it to my face that you can't hand over my daughter to me

Chidi shouted back at him

Chidi :well it was the same daughter you neglected for months, why do you need her now,or i know because of this devil who hurt your own daughter and you till choose him over her,what kind of a parent are you.

Mr uche :what i do with my daughter is none of your business, and i think you are the devil here,you are the one poisoning my daughter mind to turn her back on us her parents

Chidi got up in anger,he hate being accused over something he never did.

Chidi :how dare you,i don't care if you are amara parents but I won't take that from you,amare speak for herself and she knows what best for her,you are the one trying to destroy her life,you call yourself her parents but yet don't know the value of her happiness.

Maxwell :i really don't know why you are killing yourself over this,she is already carring my child.

Mrs Jonathan was shocked to hear this.

Maxwell :and there is nothing you can do about that

Chidih... there is so much i can do,i can get married to her and take responsibility for that child,what if she delined you as the father you know they say it only the mother that knows the real father of her child

Maxwell :you are dead

Maxwell angrily stood up to hit chidi,the soldiers immediately pointed the gun at him and he immediately stop,chidi smiled

Chidi : put down your guns

And they both lower their guns

Chidi :maxwell like i said,this is my house so try to behave yourself.

Mrs Jonathan who was sitting down watching what was going on got angry.

Mrs Jonathan :that's enough, i have been here watching you people fight over something i don't understand, i really don't know what to say in this now,Mr uche take your people, go home and come back tomorrow, let me first talk with my son.

Mr uche :no problem with that but try and talk to him,he really need to be talked to.

Mrs Jonathan :like i said come back tomorrow, and as for you young man,learn how to behave in other people's house, i might not be this kind next time,you may leave now.

Mrs uche :thank you very much for your time we will surely be here.

They got up and walked away, maxwell gave chidi a deadly look while chidi return it with a smile, they were escorted by one of the soldier's out of the sitting room.

Mrs Jonathan :i know it about that girl,chidi i am not stopping you in what ever you are having with that girl,i know everything that is going on

Chidi looked at his mother

Mrs Jonathan :yes I do and i don't see what's wrong in what you are trying to do but try and do it peacefully

Chidi :how could you know anything

Mrs Jonathan :dora told me a lot about maxwell and this amara.

Chidi was confused

Chidi :how could she knows maxwell, have she met him before

Mrs Jonathan :that i don't know,try and do the right thing chidi,

She got up

Mrs Jonathan :you can never marry her without the concept of her parents always remember that,so try and bring her back

She say this and left chidi,chidi fall back to the couch,his mother words really got to him, could it be that maxwell and dora has been working together or dora just did a background check up on him,there were lots of things in his head.

Later that evening maxwell drove to an uncompleted building in a remote area,he parked and got down from the car,he entered the building,there were other three guys waiting for him there, they were all smoking,they were all looking deadly.

Boy 1 :you are late

Maxwell :sorry about that

Boy 2 :so what's up

Maxwell :i have a business for you guys,here

Handing them a brown evalop, one of the boys took it and opened it,he looked inside and close it back.

Boy 2:everything is complete

Maxwell :yes, i want a clean job

Boy 2:no problem

Maxwell :you will get your balance when the deal is done

Boy 2:no wahala

maxwell :good.

Maxwell left,

Boy 2:boys let's bounce

They too left.

Maxwell drive back home smiling to himself,this is what he has been waiting for.

(WHAT DO YOU THINK HE HAS IN MIND TO DO TO CHIDI,
DO YOU THINK HIS PLAN WILL WORK OUT)

LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS AND
READ NEXT EPISODE

EPISODE 24


>>

ochuko was still sleeping around 10 am in d mawnin wen akpors his carry wire wipe him for back. Ochuko woke up immediately and shouted "papa u 4 don allow d man finish show me road nah". Akpors ask ochuko "which road pesin dey show u?". Ochuko answered and said "papa b4 u wake me up e get one man wey dey show me road 4 underground wey dey lead to d strong room 4 central bank of nigeria na im u come wake me up". Akpors shouted at ochuko "and u come get mind wake up abi? I go kill u 2day if u no go back 2 dat dream make d man finish show u d road. Oya go back 2 sleep now abi make i giv u sleeping pills". #abeg one word for akpors and ochuko#. lol


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-12-28 19:41:37

506 Views



I LUV DIS ONE [Read it]


I love this one:
If someone asks about your educational background, proclaim boldly that: Church is my college. Heaven is my university. Father God is my counselor. Jesus is my principal. Holy Spirit is my teacher. Angels are my classmates. Bible is my textbook. Temptations are my exams. Overcoming Satan is my hobby. Winning souls for God is my assignment. Receiving eternity is my degree. Praise and Worship are my slogan. If you are a child of God, forward this message to 5 people.


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For grammars, use oxford dictionary sixth edition.
:
THE UNEXPECTED LOVE
(Tochi in school)
Season 1
Episode 9
:
#GOOD_morning
Tochi suddenly became speechless when she heard the unexpected from Esther.
“Which of the wisdom are you talking about?” she asked.
“The senior prefect”
“Hmm, i don’t know what to say”
“I just wish he notice my love for him”
“Do you want me to help you?”
“You, help me get Wisdom?” Esther laughed.
“I can do that oh”
“Don’t worry my dear”
“But i want to tell you something”
“What’s it?”
“Someone once told me that the boy you love must love you back otherwise the relationship won’t work”
Esther thought for a while and said, “With time, he will realise my love for him and love me back”
“Okay oh” Tochi smiled.
*
Chester was always seen with Wisdom either patrolling or sitting at a point observing students and at the same time having conversation. They sat on a fallen electric pole without wire.
“Guy” Wisdom began. “If you see the embarrassment and disgrace i received from Tochi and Mr Anuma this morning you won’t believe it”
“What happened?” Chester listened.
“Can you imaging Tochi used a grammar on me probably taught by Mr Anuma when i wanted to punish her..”
Before he could finish Chester began to laugh.
“Guy, why you dey laugh nah?” Wisdom lowered his voice for the pigin English.
“I told you that girl will supersed you in this school”
“Never! She can’t try such a thing. The most annoying part of it is that Mr Anuma released her when i wanted to punish her”
“Guy, stop making enemity with this girl. She’s harmless and beautiful for that matter”
“And so wh contuine reading ???

School life [Read it]


When I was in primary school, I never knew the Nigerian
national anthem was in English language. Back then, it used to
be like:
Araiz oh compamshown
Najeriya skolobey
Tusa awa fadaslan
witlo an sley anfe
Dale bo of awahirosfa
Shaleba vi inveh
Tusa tusa awa mayt
Worle shobon in frido
Pisan yuniti"
Hehehe, don't laugh at me, I know u also sang it like that. I
thank God for what I am today


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-02-26 21:02:55

1281 Views




Ahanna counted the money again, wetting his fingers more often this time.

Finally he was done again. He turned to Obinna, eyes overwhelmed with joy. ‘Nwanne, hundred and fifty thousand!’

Obinna nodded, smiling with his lower lip slipped into his mouth. He can’t remember the last time he saw Ahanna that happy, and for that he felt greatly pleased himself.

Ahanna grabbed him suddenly in a forceful hug. ‘Hundred and fifty thousand, Nwanne!’

Obinna hugged him back and at the same time praying Ahanna hadn’t broken any of his bones.

***

The broker took them to the house the evening of the next day. They liked the room and the landlord and his young wife seemed a nice couple too.

They called them omo Igbo playfully and told them the person that had just moved out of the room they were seeking to occupy had been an Igbo too.

‘A very quiet boy,’ the landlord’s young wife said. ‘Oni wa tutu.’

The boys were excited.

The broker, Baba Duplex as he was fondly called, gave them the account number to pay the rent into.

That night Obinna could not sleep. Excitement wouldn’t let him. He couldn’t wait for them to move back to the enclosed shelter of a room. To own a stove and once again eat food he cooked himself.

To get away from the cold and the furious mosquitoes and the black spots they’d left all around his skin.

He longed to once again start writing to Ada. He would mention to her about their new success, but not the hard life that had come before it.

He prayed the mosquito spots disappeared before they saw each other again.

Finally it was 4 a.m. and the other flyover boys had started rising. Taking buckets to dark corners beside shops to have a bath.

After he’s had his own bath, he walked to the spot where he’d buried the money.

Even as he dug, he noticed something seemed different with the soil, but in his excitement easily ignored it.

When he finally brought out the tin, it felt lighter.

He opened it.

It was empty.

For many seconds he thought it was a dream and waited to wake up.

The minutes dragged and he was still there, kneeling and holding an empty tin.

He ran his palm over his face.

It was real.

Their entire savings were gone.

For the first time ever, he lost control and lay flat on the soil and started to cry.

Ahanna and some other boys rushed to him, thinking a scorpion or some other insect might have stung him.

‘Nwanne, what is it?’ Ahanna kept asking.

‘What is it na? Tell me!’

He kept on crying, rolling this way and that on the dirt.

Finally he pointed to the empty Milo tin beside him and Ahanna froze.

He turned away quietly and walked to the edge of road and sat.

That evening, he dressed up in his new clothes, the one he'd worn to church only three days ago, first time he went to church since their mishap at Oshodi.

Obinna asked him where he was headed, if he should dress up and follow him too, but he said no, that he was only going to meet a mighty man.

'Which man?' Obinna asked him.

'The man who had been so partial to me,’ Ahanna replied. ‘Had it not been him, we wouldn't have suffered this much at all, Nwanne.'

Obinna did not understand. 'If you are talking about Chief, forget it,’ he told him. ‘He is a scam.’

'I'm not talking about Chief.'

He watched Ahanna walk away, both hands in his pockets, his steps relaxed, like one on a visit to see his girlfriend.

He didn't return that evening and Obinna went to bed hungry, sad and worried.

That night, he didn’t fight the mosquitoes. He left himself for them to feed. It appeared he was completely oblivious of their presence even. Not even the tiny, nerve-twitching sounds they were making got him to move.

It was only in the morning that he saw the headline on The Punch front page – 'Youth Jumps in Train Track at Oshodi'

He'd shaken his head and turned away, consoling himself with the thought that there was someone out there they were better than.

But then the image—the crumpled figure of what had been a young man—flashed through his senses again, the patches of white from what must have been a white shirt the victim wore.

He turned quickly to the vendor and jerked the paper out of his hand.

He straightened it out and peered at the picture. He managed to make out the red dragon drawn on the white shirt.

Ahanna!

A great pound hit his chest. Sudden warmth spread round his brain and everywhere grew misty.

The vendor jerked back his paper from him, murmured something and went his way.

Obinna stood there, motionless, just staring into the air.

For many minutes his head remained blank.

A yellow bus passed him; the conductor was screaming 'O-sh-oo-di!’

He turned.

The bus stopped for a passenger to come down. He pressed his eyelids tight to let out tears he didn’t know had formed.

He wiped at his face quickly and ran towards the bus. The bus was already moving when he flew into it.

The conductor screamed at him to be sure he had change. 'Hold your change o! 500 - 1000, no change o!'

Inside the bus, the conductor held out his hand to him. ‘Owo da nbe!’

Obinna didn’t turn to him. His blank eyes were positioned stiffly ahead.

The conductor tapped him. ‘Owo e da!’

He turned to the dark-skinned man and a great stream of tears flowed down his cheeks instead.

The conductor drew back. ‘Ah, kilo fa ekun? I said give me your money and you are crying for me? Na your tears I wan chop ni? Pay me jor!’

That was when the fat woman sitting beside him turned to look at him. She quickly opened her purse and gave the conductor N50.

But she didn’t ask Obinna why he was crying.

The bus stopped at Oshodi and he came down.

He walked to the train track, scanned round but saw no body.

Officials have come to dispose Ahanna’s body.

He kept on looking, checking, and then suddenly it hit him again whose body he was looking to find.

It was Nwanne’s body.

His eyes filled up again and he went and sat on the train rails. People stared at him. But he didn't mind.

He waited and waited, the sun biting away at his skin, tears and sweat warring on his face, but no train came for him.

A man passing yelled at him in Yoruba. He heard 'were ni' and he knew what it was.

Mad man.

He wished now he was.

End of Season 1


Did you enjoy the story
Season 2 will continue as soon as i get 20 comments


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Thug Life [Read it]


Caption this?







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-03 20:39:19

770 Views




Santa: A friend of mine had an arguement with his wife so they decided to flip a coin to choose a name for their new son.

Banta: So what exactly did they name him?

Santa: Tails!Related

me and ma gf [Read it]


I need your help friends.

My girlfriend told me this morning that its over between us so i decided to kill myself. I drank a chilled Coke and Meat Pie but i'm still very much alive.

I don't know if i should add Chicken and Chips. I am very confused right now, any suggestions please ?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-20 00:41:29

398 Views



New year [Read it]


Wow, is a new year indeed, soo hapi to s uall in 2015


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-01-01 06:11:25

109 Views




Resting on my bed listening to some old school
hip-hop after a stressful day at school. We
wrote two tests (Ofcoz i wrote well), a group
presentation (i was the group leader, while
Mirabel and Promise was also the group leader
of theirs). The scores of the previous test we
wrote was announced. Tests are 20/20 while
other Lecturers set theirs 30/30. I scored 30 in
English, 20 in introduction to business and 22/30
in maths. Promise scored 28 in English, 19 in
introduction to business and 27/30 in maths.
While Mirabel scored 22 in English, 20 in
introduction to business and 27/30 in maths.
She didn’t do well in English, but not enough to
be her limit.
*Phone rings*
Me: Hello
Esther: Hi, how u doing?
Me: Fine but stressed out
Esther: School abi?
Me: Yea, how u?
Esther: I’m fine ooo…. as u don’t even call again
Me: No vex, many tinz just dey for me to do (vex
o)
Esther: Ok oo, I feel bored, should i come over?
*knocks on the door*
Titus and two guys walked in after i told them
to come in
Me: *On phone*I have visitors maybe some other
time
Esther: Who are they?
Me: (Ah ah since when that one start) My
friends, talk to u later.
Esther: Ok
*Hangs up*
Titus: Guy hwfa
Me: I dey o (shakes hand with them)
Titus: Off this your 2Pac put P.S for person jare
(video game)
Me: Na una i buy ‘am for na
They have been coming to my place since i
bought and told them about it. I just set it for
them then took a walk out, not in the mood for
video game that moment.
Walking on the street along the school road
checking out the environment. Then i heard
someone calling my name with an unfamiliar
voice. I looked at the side where the voice was
coming from, i saw two recognizable eve-like
creatures waving at me from a car or their car.
My course mates, I went closer to them while
they fold their arms and lean on their car.
Cynthia: Victor cant even hear his name again
Tola: Did she break your heart?
Me: She who? my heart fit break?
*Both laughs*
Tola: Hwfa
Me: I’m ok. How school today?
Tola: Guy, we thank God o… u try wella for the
presentation.
Me: Thanks
Cynthia: Too bad i no dey una group
Me: Mirabel do well for una na
Cynthia: True but… hmmm not bad sha
Tola: U live around here?
Me: Yea, that block there*pointing*
Tola: OK we go check on u make u put us
through on that Accounting abeg, u know the
exam is near now
Cynthia: Yes o… we didn’t do well in the test.
Me: That won’t be a problem, lets just set a
date and time then we’d meet in class
Tola: At school?
Cynthia: What about your room? Or your
roommate won’t allow it??
Me: (Hhmmm… Oh Lord! save me from
temptations. What are they thinking) I stay alone
but my guys always come around. I think the
class will be ok for learning.
Cynthia: That class sef, the noise and
distractions emanating from those students
would a hindrance. U should come to our place
Tola: Yea, come to our place
Me: Hhmmm
Tola: Don’t worry, we’d treat u well
Me: (Sh!t! No!!) Where is this your place?
Cynthia: At VIPI 2C iv
Woah! This girls must be very rich to be living
there.
VIPI – VIP INN
2C – SECOND CLASS WING
iv – ROOM NUMBER
Me: Thats where u guys live?
Tola: Yep
Me: Oh i see, aright then
Tola: So… when will be convenient for u?
Me: Anytime is fine by me
Tola: Ok then… u should give us your number so
we’d contact u
Me: Alright, 070********
Tola: Ok
Cynthia: See u around then
Me: Alright.
They both gave me a hug with that they zoomed
off leaving me with my thoughts.

To Be Continued.... #B-goF

>> Part 8 -

# EPISODE 2
“The white girl brought it.” Juliet answered. ” what!” Ish shouted. He got furious and threw the drink away. He got mad at Juliet and went home. Juliet followed up in the evening to talk things out with Ish but he wouldnt listen.

“Drive me to a place” Christy said to one of her drivers one evening when both parents were absent. Aside the driver, she also had a security man around her. She went to the field after informing Juliet that she would like to meet her. As she was being waited for, christy had a long chat with Juliet. They became friends since then and they met several times to have fun. Juliet got to know more of Christy and Christy likewise did same. ” can you please bring ishmeal along when we are meeting like this?” christy requested. Juliet knew how rude ish could be so she hesitated and agreed after Christy’s pressure.

Juliet tried her best to explain things to ish that she had found a friend in christy but he seemed not to care. “Can you please go with me, when ever i want to meet her?” juliet pleaded. Juliet was ish’s first friend, and they had been good friends ever since, aside their differences, they still stick together.
Ish could hardly refuse her so he accepted her plead even though it was against his will. ” but prevent her from getting close to me if you dont want any problem with me” He warned. Christy got to know of ish’s predicaments. ” please Lord, change his heart for the better. Make his heart as pure as his face, he is very handsome lord..” christy knelt down and prayed when going to bed. ” may i know who that prayer goes to?” mrs paula asked her daughter. ” huh!… Urrmmm.. Dad” she answered with a wide smile. Mrs paula was surprise christy was admiring her dad that way. She asked her daughter to go to bed.

The following morning, Juliet reminded ish to escort her when meeting christy. ” i will try.” he responded. Christiana was also getting ready later in the evening. She knew ish was coming along so she had to look confortable and good. “how will i get through my mum tonight?” she asked herself. Her dad wasnt a problem. He leaves home and comes back a week or a month later. But mrs paula is always at home if not for business reasons. ” mum, will you be going out tonight? Maybe around 6pm?, you see, i wanna go out to explore.” she said to her mum. ” i dont have any friends in Ghana dear, when i go out, then im just meeting business partners. Princess i dont allow you to go out because you are too young. You are just six.” mrs paula tried to reason with her daughter. ” mum, i feel so alone, please allow me to be with my friends, i promise nothing bad will happen. I will be a good girl and come back home on time. I promise mum” christy fortunately cconvinced her mum.
It was 6:30pm already and juliet was present with ish. Christy came in with her car before ish could complain about her delay. ” hello guys” christiana said with a smile while staring into ish eyes.
The drama is yet to begin.
CHRISTIAN CONTINUES

>>

Thus says Pamela Anderson:

Learn to be happy with small things in life… because the big ones are usually artificial!Related

My eyes r hurting coz I can`t see U;

My arms r empty coz I can`t hold U;

My lips r cold coz I can`t kiss U;

And my heart is breaking coz I m not with U.Related

“Sky why are you doing this to yourself” Jessy’s voice thundered into my ears with a bang coming in a shrieking pitch.

I cast a long stare at the bold sparkling transparent glass cup in my hand, the golden brown liquor sparkled and shimmered inside the cup.

It has been 4 days since Chioma dropped our engagement ring. I have tried going to her house only to be stopped short by Hassan the second time under the directives of Chioma’s father.

“You must open this gate today” I barked at Hassan charging towards him with clenched fist and tightened face.

He was visibly shaking being intimidated by my towering 6’9height standing at 5’8ft himself with a tiny physique.

“Oga abeg, na oga say make i no allow you” He sounded pleading, the sparkle in his eyes betraying his fear.

“I don’t care Hassan, i can’t take it anymore” I barked banging both my hands and feet on the gate, hot dripping sweats covering my face dripping down to the crack my back smearing my ash coloured t-shirt.

My bangs on the gate became louder with each passing minute, the sweats stepping out in a more bolder manner as the sun battered my face.

Sitting down in front of the gate for a little more than two hours, i could make out people casting a suspicious look at me, some where pointing at shaking their heads.

i over heard one remark “Oh who did this to this young man” betraying the fact that they were under the impression i was going nuts.

Hassan’s eyes were popped out through the hatch, a remarkable look of pity written all over. * *

“Sky i don’t like this thing you are doing one bit” Jessy thundered banging her hands on the long sitting room bar table.

I had lost any reason to talk, i deemed it unnecessary, taking another long gulp of the liquor, i felt as a hot sensation travelled from the base of my tongue down to my abdomen.

“Give me this cup” Jessy blurted out making for the glass cup in my hand, within seconds she had wrestled the extra-large glass cup from me and i heard it crashing on the floor in a shattering song.

My head felt light and view blurred. i made for the almost finished bottle of henesy sitting a few inches from me only to get another shattering sound of breaking bottles as Jessy quickly pushed it out of the bar with quick reflex.

“Sky you want to kill yourself right? . . Look at what you are doing to yourself trying to drink yourself to death because of Chioma. is this the end of your life?” She was barking at the top of her voice.

her eyes wet and was almost ready to drop, depression was written all over her face and a sense of utmost concern and pity.

I dragged myself up, couldn’t maintain my balance as my legs kept wobbling under me threatening to give way, the surrounding appearing to be in a uniformed spin.

I staggered to the sitting room and slumped into a sofa. “Jessy just leave me alone for Christ sake” i groaned.

I watched as Jessy paced around a bit, dipped her hand into her silvery sleek hand bag and brought out her phone, caressing the keypads as she dialed a number.

“Hello Chioma” she sang into the ear phone still maintaining a depressed look smeared in a blank composure.

“Oh please stop the pet names, see listen to me very carefully. If anything happens to my twin brother, I will never forgive you. Mark my words” She yelled into the phone then cut the call with a hard punch of the finger flinging the phone carelessly which luckily landed on a lone sofa beside me.

Her depressed pitying look now turned red with anger with a little pinch of frustration.

“Sky we have to go and see papa, he must be told of the latest developments”

I threw a long stare at Jessy, it really might be a good idea, i shouldn’t carry this cross alone papa should know.

Jessy made lunch for me with a cup of hot coffee after which i took a cold shower and slept off for the first time in days.

The evening was gloomy and twilight appeared darker than normal. The compound looked deserted and cold as Jessy taxied the car inside with me seating on the passengers side watching Effiong struggle and wrestle while closing the gigantic gate.

His small frame wrestling the gate was a kind of unadulterated amusement to me anytime i see it.

Papa sat on his usual sofa in the sitting room, the t.v remote control on his hands as he toggled between A.I.T and it’s equally annoying counter part N.T.A.

He has gotten leaner and paler than the last time i saw him and his whole physique appeared weak and feeble even though his wounds were almost healed.

Good evening Papa” I greeted and Jessy’s almost immediately after mine.
“Ooh Ejimam!!!” Papa intoned flashing the front part of his dental formula.

His words sounded like he forced them out of his throat and exhibited a lot of weakness.
“Nnam, You dont look well, what is the matter?” Papa asked almost immediately i sat on a sofa beside his, his eyes peered into my face both of them appeared to have gone deeper into his face due to his clearly visible cheek bones.

“Papa, am fine” I said with a forced smile tilting my face out from the range of his face.
“Nnam remember you are my son and i have watched you grow, i know when you are fine and when you are not. You cant lie to me”
Papa’s gaze on me intensified, his breathe sounding loud as someone who just finished a marathon race.

“Papa dont mind him, i brought him here because their is something we wanted to discuss with you” Jessy chipped in nodding at papa.

Papa gave a consenting nod, leaning back unto the sofa his chest rose and fell hard and his mouth dropped a little open.

“Papa are you alright?” Jessy asked standing from her seat placing her hands on papa’s head and chest.
“Yes am fine Nne, please go to that drawer in my room, open that your mother’s old drawer, You will find a bag containing my medications” His words were even more forced out now.

Jessy disappeared into the stair case, i kept on looking at papa who now closed his eyes relaxing into the sofa.
I can’t believe papa turned this weak and lean like that but right here before my face he was slipping.

“Sky! Sky!! Come up here!!!” I heard Jessy’s voice from the direction of Papa’s room.
“What is it!!” i Yelled after her maintaining my seating position.

“Just come up here this imbecile!!!” Her voice appeared even angrier and pissed.

I sprang up from the seat and reluctantly made it up the stairs. Papa only peeked open his eyes, let out a weak smile and closed it again.

“What is it eeehn??” i let out on getting into papa’s room, Jessy sat beside mama’s old desk holding up a little transparent plastic cup of medicine with little yellow tablets inside, her whole gaze were fixed on it.

“What is it naaa??” I asked again getting closer.

“Sky, look at this medicine, if this is what i think it is…” she was handing me the little plastic container.
I looked at it for a little more than 2seconds, all i could see was just a bunch of little yellow tablets.

“It’s just papa’s medicine jessy, what do you think it is” i asked handing her back the little container.

“Sky if my guess is right these are Haimdal’s pills” She was sounding anxious and visibly sweating when the air was chilly to me.

“Ok Jessy what’s Haimdal’s pills, do you think am also a doctor or what?”

“Sky just shut up, Haimdal’s pills are very toxic pills, it slowly shrinks and kills the human organs which will inevitably result to the death of patient if administering is persisted” Her eyes were popped as she was still casting a cold look at the container.

“How did it get into papa’s medicine then?” I asked a little pinch of fear sipping in.

“I don’t know, it smells like it and looks like it, i will have to take this to the hospital tomorrow to check and be sure” She announced slipping it down her pocket.

We went down to papa who still sat calmly with his eyes closed. All of a sudden appeared like he was dying to me.

“Papa who brought those medicines for you?” Jessy asked going to seat beside papa while i sat opposite them looking on.
“Nne it was Amanda, doctor called and she went and picked them up for me and she gives it to me as prescribed by the doctor on daily basis but she’s not home now” He said peering at Jessy.

My heart skipped a beat immediately the name Amanda was mentioned.
“Here papa, take this medicine tonight” Jessy said handing papa a satchet containing white tablets.

“what about my medications nne” papa asked with confusion written on his look.
“Don’t worry papa, dont touch them again i will go and see doctor and make a little adjustments in your medications and bring them to you myself tomorrow” she smiled at him throwing a blind wink at me.

“Ok nne” papa smiled back.

“Now nnam tell me what is it you wanted to” papa asked still smiling.

I was reluctant not knowing if it was a good idea feeding papa such bad news at this moment. i looked at Jessy who gestured me to.

I took time to narrate everything to papa, from Amanda’s sabotage to my supposed parents-inlaws, to her claim of Ryan being my son and lastly i and Chioma’s shaky and fizzling relationship culminating into a foggy wedding possibility.

Papa slumped back into the seat again, he was strangely very calm.

“I knew this may happen someday” He muttered to himself yet it was audible to i and Jessy.
“I should have done this a long time ago before now” He sighed again.

“Nnam do not despair, everything will be fine. i need to do what i should have done before, we are going for a DNA test”. He announced a lot of calmness and confidence written in his words.

I just hope he is right that “everything will be fine”


>>

Height of Begging:

A sleeping beggar puts up a placard in front of him:

Please do not make noise by dropping coins. Offer notes.Related

Bank Girlfriend [Read it]


I have been dating her for over four months now and everything was going fine until this morning when I decided to invite her to my place. And she came!

When we were together, her phone rang but she refused to pick her call, and I ask her why she didn't pick, she said nothing. I checked who was calling her, I saw 'Sterling Bank calling', and I begged her to pick, maybe the bank wants to give her money.

After that another call entered, 'GTB calling', she ignored it, UBA followed, and I picked it but the person didn't talk so I cut the call.

A minute later, First Bank call entered, she put it on hold, when Zenith Bank called, she shouted at Zenith Bank.

An hour later, one call entered her phone singing a Lionel Richie song, I check and I saw 'CBN', she picked it and answered the call sweetly.

Later when I asked her, she said that her Uncle who is working there was the one that wished to speak with her through the office line.

Few minutes later, World Bank call entered and she was so happy to pick the call. After she had finished receiving the call I picked up my phone to flash her number.

Guess what I saw? Community Bank.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-09 08:36:34

230 Views




Akpos and his wife was having a walk one evening. As they pass the nearby market a handsome guy selling meat waved Akpos`s wife and she responded. "Who was that" says Akpos. "He is my very good customer that use to sell meat for me well. I like him so much.", responded the wife. Akpos wasn`t happy inside him but he kept it to himself. As they kept going, Akpos saw a girl by the other side of the road and waved her. "Honey who was that girl?" said his wife. She use to rob my back when u stay long at the market.




NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-03-03 16:38:02

1276 Views



Motion Sickness [Read it]


Santa and Banta are discussing the possibility of love. “I thought I was in love three times,” Santa says.
“Thought…?” Banta asks. “What do you mean?”
“Three years ago, I cared very deeply for a woman who wanted nothing to do with me,” Santa says.
“Wasn’t that love?” Banta asks.
“No, that was obsession,” Santa explains. “Then two years ago, I cared very deeply for an attractive woman who didn’t understand me.”
“Wasn’t that love?” asks Banta.
“No, that was lust,” Santa replies. “And just last year, I met a woman while I was on a cruise. She was gorgeous, intelligent, a great conversationalist and had a super sense of humor. Everywhere I followed her on that ship, I would get a very strange sensation in the pit of my stomach.”
“Well, wasn’t that love,” asks Banta.
“No. That was motion sickness!” Santa replies.Related

Three men were sitting in a bar talking about how whipped they had their wives.


The first two kept bragging about how they could get their wives to do anything.


They looked at the third man and he said, “I have my wife so whipped that the other day I had her crawling towards me on her hands and knees.”


Both of the other men were very impressed and asked him how he had managed that.


The man replied, “Well, I was laying under the bed and she crawled over and said, ‘Come out and fight like a man!'”Related

shout [Read it]


E get one particular restaurant wey i
dey go chop 4 G.R.A. E get one
oyinbo wey dey always come chop
there too...
Anytime dis oyinbo chop finish, he go
shout ''Hey'', so I wonder wetin dey
make am shout. I decided to chop
wetin d oyinbo dey always chop so
maybe me self go shout too. When I
reach d restaurant yesterday evening,
I order wetin d man dey chop. Dem
tell me say na chicken & red wine, so
i chop am finish, i no shout.
I collect extra plate, but i no still
shout. I say dis oyinbo na mumu o,
wetin dey make am shout like dat?
Na so i just vex ask 4 my bill. The
waiter tell me say one plate of
chicken & red wine na N75,000 then d
extra plate too na another N75,000.
Na then I shout hey! heyy!! heyyy!!!
heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
yyyyyyyyyyyy...........Up till now, I
still dey shout


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-13 20:31:03

180 Views




Akpos and his wife were flying to Australia for a two week vacation to
celebrate their 40th anniversary.


Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies
and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have
ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing.
Luckily, I
see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the
beach.
However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have
to live on the island for the rest of our lives!"

Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the
island.


An hour later Akpos turns to his wife and asks, "did we pay our N500,000 Church pledge check yet?"

"No, sweetheart," she responds.
Akpos, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Honey, did we pay
our American Express card yet?"

"Oh, no! I’m sorry. I forgot to send the check," she says.

"One last thing, Did you remember to send checks for the Visa
and MasterCard this month?" he asks.

"Oh, forgive me," begged his wife. "I didn’t send that one, either."

Akpos grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years.
Esther pulls away and asks him, "What was that for?"
Akpos answers, "They’ll find us!"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-03-12 11:26:00

3643 Views




Friendship is when you have had a huge fight, deciding once for all… ‘That’s it’, but then you decide to put aside your egos, hold hands & say, “I Need U…”Related

How are u going to feel (if ur girlfriend says to u i am not interested again)







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-02 11:05:13

1345 Views




Women spend more time thinking about what men think; than the actual time spent by men on thinking!Related

A teacher in Akpos class was on a topic "ROCKS" she asked mention the types of rocks.
Obi: Sedimentary rock.
Eddy: Igneous
Esther: Metamorphic rock. and the teacher said very good but after that she saw Akpos waving his hands and the teacher said yes Akpos what?
Akpos:you have not mention one.
which one asked the teacher
Akpos Tthe rock of ages.the whole class laughed


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-23 17:21:36

6133 Views




An old man and woman hated each other, but remained
married for years. Each time they fought, the old man
would warn his wife,
OLD MAN:”If I die first, I will dig my way up and out of the
grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!”
One day, the man abruptly died. After the burial, the wife
went straight to the local bar and began to party. Her friends
asked if she wasn’t worried about her husband digging
himself out of the grave.
The wife smiled and said, “Let the old fool dig. I had him
buried upside down!”
ONE WORD FOR THIS WOMAN?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-08 11:20:49

429 Views




Government announced that if U have 5 kids, ur salary will be increased to #500,000. A man heard the news and said to his wife, I have a kid with my girlfriend. I'm going to bring him so we can add him to our 4 kids. When he came back, he saw only one of his kids remaining. He asked, where are the other 3? His wife replied, you are not the only one who heard the news. THEIR FATHERS HAVE COME FOR THEM.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-26 22:47:59

632 Views



At Dinner [Read it]


At Dinner six year old bisola started telling a story...
Bisola: On my way back from
school, i saw dad with a girl...
FATHER: Shut up! Dont talk
with food in yo
mouth...
MOTHER: No no no let her talk...
Bisola: Dad, u went in da bush,
i followed u and u started kissing and
undressed her and then...!!!
MOTHER: And then wat baby? Say it I will get u
a bunch of choloclets...
Bisola: They started doing wat
u do with uncle Mike wen dad is not around...
MOTHER: shut up your dad has told u not 2 talk
with food in your mouth stupid
child no table manner..!!! Haaaa woman!!!!!


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-06 23:47:43

221 Views




“I am coming over right away” Mansa said and
hung
up.
“What happened to Elvis?” Derek asked.
“He has been involved in an accident and is currently
admitted at the hospital. Derek, I really have to go
and see him” Mansa said.
“Mum won’t allow you to go see him but I will
help
you out. Use the back door and meet me at the grass
yard, then we can go” Derek said.
“Thank you so much Derek, I appreciate it” Mansa
replied.
Derek immediately left Mansa’s room and went to
find his elder brother Chris. He told him what was happening because he trusted him.
“Chris, mum shouldn’t know about this please…
I’m
accompanying Mansa to the hospital to see a
friend
of hers, we will be back soon. Just cover up for me”,
Derek pleaded.
“Sure, I will” Chris assured him.
Derek unknowingly made a very big mistake
confiding in Chris. He didn’t know his brother
couldn’t be trusted when it came to issues that had to do
with
Mansa.
As soon as Mansa and Derek left, Chris headed
straight for his mum’s room and knocked on her
door. She was fast asleep but woke up at the sound
of Chris’ persistent knocks. She quickly got up and
went to open the door for him.
Meanwhile, Derek and Mansa arrived the hospital
in
no time, but they were not allowed to see Elvis. His
condition seemed very critical. He was said to be
hanging between life and death and doctors
warned
that if care was not taken, he could loose his life.
Mansa cried when she heard about Elvis’ critical condition. Derek stood there and comforted her.
Sister Rita from Church ran into them just then.
She was in the same church with the Bernard
family.
She was Head of the church’s ushering
department. Apparently, she also came to visit her sister who
had
just had a baby.
“Mansa, what are you doing here? Is everything
alright” Rita asked when she saw her.
“My sister, a friend of mine has been admitted here
and he is in a critical condition. We are not even
allowed to see him.” Mansa answered.
“Oh my dear! It is well, with God all things are
possible. This is the time you should be praying
instead of crying” Riri advised. “You’re right my sister” Mansa said. The three of them quickly said
a
word of prayer together…
“I believe God is in control now. I have to get
going as
it’s getting late. I will call you tomorrow morning to
get an update” Rita said and left.
As soon as she left them, she took out her phone
and
called Mrs Bernard who was impatiently waiting
for Derek and Mansa to return. “Hello, who is this?”
Mrs
Bernard said when she answered the phone.
“Hello, Good evening. This is Sister Rita the
Usher”,
she answered. “Oh, nice to hear from you. I hope everything is alright?” Mrs. Bernard asked.
“Yes madam, I was wondering if you were
around… I
just saw Derek and Mansa here”
“Around where? I’m home. Where did you see
them? She asked. “At the general hospital. I thought you
were around was why I called, so I could see you
before leaving” Rita said.
“Oh no my dear, but you can come see me at the
house tomorrow. Which hospital did you say you
saw them?” Mrs. Bernard asked again.
“General hospital madam” Rita confirmed.
“Thank you very much.” Mrs Bernard said and
hung
up.
“My son, God works in mysterious ways… I have just
gotten information on which hospital they went
to.
I’m going there right away”, Mrs Bernard said to
Chris.
“Mum, why not go and see Elvis himself tomorrow
morning? That’ll be a perfect time for you to
confront
him directly” Chris said. She thought about it
briefly
and agreed “I guess you are right. I actually need to
get some sleep… You interrupted my beauty sleep
when you came knocking on my door.” She said
that
and went back into her room to sleep.
Meanwhile, Derek and Mansa were already on their
way home. They had no option but to return
home
and go back to the hospital the following
morning
since they were not allowed to see Elvis. They got home to find everyone asleep.
“Derek, thank you very much for all you did for me
today,” Mansa said.
“Don’t worry sis, it’s always a pleasure. What we
need
to do now is to keep praying… Hopefully, we will have
good news tomorrow. ” Derek said.
They hugged each other and went to their
separate
rooms.
Mansa couldn’t sleep that night, she prayed all night
and fell asleep around 3:00am.
Mrs. Bernard and Chris woke up early that
morning,
ahead of Mansa and Derek. They quickly got
dressed and went the hospital to see Elvis.
When they arrived, they were told Elvis was
responding to treatment so they had the
opportunity
to see him.
Mrs. Bernard went into the ward alone leaving Chris
behind at the OPD.
Elvis was indeed lucky to have survived the
accident.
His head, arms and legs were all covered in
bandage. He could hardly move. Mrs Bernard, however,
overlooked all those details. She was just
concerned
about her mission.
“Young man, how are you? She asked.
“I’m feeling better, thank God” Elvis answered. “You
better be. I believe you know who I am? She
asked.
“Yes Madam” Elvis answered.
“Good. Now let me be quick. I want you to stay
away from Mansa. I don’t want to see you anywhere
near
her again.” She said.
“Madam” Elvis said in pains.
“I am in no mood for any negotiations, so don’t
call me. Just be warned… You’ll have yourself to
blame if
anything happens” She said and left the ward.
Elvis didn’t understand what was going on. He
was
surprised to hear this from Mrs Bernard. Within a few minutes, Elvis was just motionless.
This
got the attention of the nurses. They hurriedly
called
a Doctor to come to their aid.
It wasn’t looking good, Elvis was dying. Derek and Mansa arrived just at that moment and
they were asked to wait. After about 45 minutes,
the
Doctor finally came out.
Mansa quickly rushed towards the doctor.
“Doc, please how is he? She asked desperately. “I’m sorry, we did all we could”, the Doc said.
“What do you mean, Doc? Mansa asked.
“I’m afraid, we just lost him” the Doc declared.
“What!!!!!!!!! Mansa shouted
To be continued…
“I’m afraid, we just lost him” the Doc declared. “What!!!!!!!!! Mansa shouted
“Doc, please tell me it’s a lie. How? She continued
as
Derek held her by the shoulder to console her.
“We tried all we could. I’m really sorry for your
loss” the Doc confirmed and left Derek with her at the
OPD.
Mansa cried her heart out… She couldn’t help
herself… She was inconsolable.
There was nothing Derek could do to comfort her.
He waited patiently till she was ready to go and drove
her home.
Chris and his mother were already home.
Despite the mischief they had been up to earlier,
they
were reading and sharing from the bible together. Derek and Mansa met them in the living room.
Mansa who was still crying ran into her room
leaving
Derek behind and locked herself up.
That got the attention of Chris and his mother.
“What is wrong with that girl, has she lost her manners or what? How could she walk pass me
without greeting”, Mrs. Bernard complained.
“Mum, please don’t blame her. She is in pain, she
just
lost her friend Elvis, the one we saw at church the
other day” Derek intervened. “Oh so sorry for her, but it still does not justify her
actions. I am the one taking care of her. Even the
bible says ”let the dead burry their dead’ ” Mrs
Bernard responded.
“What?! Mum, did you just say that? Come on, the
girl is really hurt!” Derek said and walked away,
leaving
his mother with Chris who refused to utter a word.
Mansa stayed in her room all day weeping. Derek
brought her food to her but she refused to eat.
Somehow, she blamed herself for Elvis’ death. She
figured that if Elvis hadn’t driven her home, he’d
still
be alive.
It was out of his kind gesture that this tragedy
had happened.
Maybe her foster mother was right, she thought.
She
should have stayed away from Elvis. At least, he’d
still
be alive. Mansa blamed herself. She knelt down beside her
bed at that moment, looked up to her roof and
began
praying with tears in her eyes.
“God, why am I going through this. Forgive my
sins, I beg of you. I pray that you grant Elvis rest with
you.
Forgive me father for I know I’m the cause of this,
forgive me.” She prayed.
Time ran fast and soon it was 6:30PM. Mansa had
forgotten she had a prayer meeting that evening. As head of the prayer group, her presence was
required in church.
It had completely skipped Mansa due to the
current
situation she was in.
Rita called her to ask if she was going to make it. On phone:
Rita: “Hello Mansa, where are you? We are here
waiting for you.”
Mansa: “I’m sorry Rita, I can’t make it. Please let
someone stand in for me”
Rita: “Why? What’s wrong? This is very unusual of you.
Mansa: “We’ll talk about it later. Just kindly do me
that favor, ok. Let someone take over”.
Rita: “You really surprise me but fair enough, will
do
just that. You take care now, I’ll call you later.” Rita hung up and immediately called Mrs Bernard
to
tell her about the conversation with Mansa.
Mrs. Bernard got upset. She stormed into Mansa’s
room.
“Young lady, what are you still doing here when you
are supposed to be at church? She aggressively
asked.
“Mum, I’m sorry but I can’t make it today” Mansa
answered.
“Look, you better dress up and get ready for church
before I pounce on you. Have you lost it? What do
you think I have been bringing you up for?” she
said.
Mansa quickly got up and began dressing. Mrs
Bernard was leaving Mansa’s room when she remembered that she had left her purse in her
room.
She asked Mansa to fetch it for her while she left
and
waited in the living room.
Mansa brought the purse to her and returned to her
room to finish dressing up.
Mrs. Bernard opened her purse and her facial
expression changed.
It appeared that she had lost her money. She
immediately called Mansa back to ask her. “Hey! Where is the N5,000 I kept in the purse?”
she
asked.
Mansa was clueless “Mum, I …” she started
saying,
but before she could finish speaking, Mrs. Bernard landed a heavy slap on her face.
“Where is the money?” she asked again, looking
furious.
To be continued

>>

A biker went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him.


She turned to the biker and asked, “Are you a real biker?”


He replied, “Well, I’ve spent my whole life on Harleys. My momma was pregnant with me when she rode on the back of my Daddy’s Harley, then as a little boy I rode on the back with my Daddy until I finally got my own Harley. I’ve been riding a Harley ever since. So yes, I guess I am a real biker.”


She said, “I’m a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women; when I shower, watch TV, eat, whatever, everything seems to make me think of women.”


Then she got up and left.


The biker was thinking about what just happened when a man sat down next to the biker and asked, “Are you a real biker?”


He replied, “I always thought I was, but I just found out I’m a lesbian.”Related
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