Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:


1 bande Ne Ek Function Orgaize Kiya

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.

Usne Dekha Ki Invitation Se Zyada

Log Aaye Hain

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.

Wo Stage Pe Gya.. Aur Bola

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Jo Jo Ladki Walon Ki Taraf Se hai.. Wo Idher Ek side Me Aa Jaaye.

10-15 Aa Gye Ek Taraf.

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Phir usne Bola Ki Jo Ladke Walon Ki Taraf Se Hain.. Wo Bhi Udher Aa jaye.

10-15 Log Phir Aa Gye

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Ab usne Ne Ek Danda Le K Un Sab

ko (ladki wale plus ladke wale) ko maar maar ke bhagaaya.. aur kaha

“Ye Birthday Party hai…Haraamkhoro”Related

A British General had
sent some of his men
off to fight for their
country in the Falkland
Island Crisis.
Upon returning to
England from the South
American island, three
soldiers that had
distinguished
themselves in battle
were summoned to the
General’s office.
“Since we weren’t
actually at war,” the
General began, “I can’t
give out any medals.
We did, however, want
to let each of you know
your efforts were
appreciated.
What we’ve decided to
do is to let each of you
choose two points on
your body.
You will be given two
pounds sterling for each
inch of distance
between those parts.
We’ll start on the left,
boys, so what’ll it be?”
Soldier 1: “The tip of me
head to me toes, sahr!”
General: “Very good son,
that’s 70 inches which
comes to 140 pounds”
Soldier 2: “The tip of the
finger on one
outstretched hand to
the tip of the other,
sir!”
General: “Even better
son, that’s 72 inches
which comes to 144
pounds”
Soldier 3: “The palm of
me hand to the tip of
me left pinky, sahr!”
General: “That’s a
strange but fair
request, son!
As the general begins
the measurement:
“What!
Son, where is your left
pinky?”
Soldier 3: “Falkland
Island, sahr!”



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-25 16:32:50

239 Views



Naming a baby [Read it]


A man's wife put to bed a bouncing baby boy.
"Honey! What name do we give our baby? Asked the wife.
The man replied "Hmmmmmmm, let's name him Akpos"
The woman rebuked "Thunder Fire You"
"For what!" Says the man.
She replied angrily "You want him to grow up and sleep with our maid"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-12 11:01:43

409 Views



father and son [Read it]


Father :son can you go buy me a soft drink....
Son : coke or fanta?
Father : coke
Son : Diet or regular?
Father : Regular.
Son : Bottled or cane?
Father : Bottled.
Son : 500 ml or 300 ml?
Father : Damn it!!! just buy me water!!
Son : Natural or mineral?
Father : Mineral.
Son : Chilled or cold?
Father : Am gonna strike you with a broom you
idiot.
Son : Hard broom or soft broom?
Father : Stop this you little animal.
Son : Cow or pig?
Father : Get the hell out of here you bastard!!
Son : Now or later?
Father : Now!!
Son : So you gonna thro me out or not?
Father : Am gonna kill you!
Son : With a gun or knife?

Father : Am gonna shoot you little bastard!!
Son : In the head or stomach??
Father : You pest!
Son : Cockroach or locust?
Father : Fuck you!!!!!!
Son : With a condom or live??
Father faints)
Son : Are you died or sleeping?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-15 19:30:46

523 Views




Someone sent this in:- We met few months ago, initially i did not want to date her because she’s too flashy/fake for my liking. Gradually, she started proving me wrong by being a good and serious one. infact she stopped some of her fake attitude when i started complaining about it. To be sincere i really love her to the extent that i introduced her to my brother(something i dont normally do if i wanna do chop and clean mouth). Just few days ago she lost her phone and wanted me to help her buy a new one. I bought the one she wants and gave it to her. she called me later in the evening that the one i bought comes with 16g and not 32gig as expected. I collected it back with the hope of returning it today. On checking the phone, i discovered she had forgot to sign out her facebook messager, badoo etc. I was extremely shocked when i view some of her chats (both old and new ones) with random men. To cut the story short, she is a free giver and a LovePeddler in my own view. Now i’ve exchanged the phone and she is coming to collect it tomorrow. i dont feel like giving her again, infact i hate her from that moment. Guys, i need an unsuspicious method to make her leave me. Drop your comment.#AoN


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-11 21:41:43

787 Views



Customer care [Read it]


I called MTN's customer care number, a lady
picked, and we had this
conversation.
Lady: hello, good evening, thanks for calling MTN
customer care service, my name
is Judith, what's your name and where are you
calling from?
Me: hello Judith, my name is Bigfish and i'm calling
from sokoto
Lady: How may i help you,
Me: i'm looking for a wife to marry...
Lady: Is that why you called this customer care
service?
Me: Yes, and i think i'm already in love with You...
you know you have a very
nice voice...
Lady: Hellooo, please, we only attend to issues
about your MTN line, owkay...
Me: yes o... This is an issue about my MTN line
too...because i spend much
credit calling so many girls asking them about
marriage....
Lady: please, i would have to put an end to this
call...
Me: Baby don't talk like that now... I promise to
make you happy...you will be
happy with me...can i have your number...
Lady: *raises her voice* come, mr man, i think
something is wrong with you....
Me: *cutting in*... Hey, hold it there... I hope you
can now feel how frustrating
it is to receive a call and hear rubbish?
From today, warn yourself and every other staff
there..
let nobody call me with any funny number only for it
to be an advert or send
me those nonsense messages you guys disturb my
phone with daily like say I dey
date MTN...*call disconnected*


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-13 07:37:56

578 Views




Maxwell stood there smiling looking at Amara

Maxwell :hello Amara

Amara wanted to close the door but maxwell push the door open,went inside and stup the door,This made Amara move backward,maxwell came closer to her and began to admiring the sitting room.

Maxwell :nice place

Amara was angry and scared

Amara :what are you doing here,leave this intents,right now.

Amara was really frightened and maxwell could feel it in her voice

Maxwell :and if i don't, what will you do,call chidi i suppose,what were you thinking that i won't find you,i told you I will fish you out didn't i,you are mine and mine alone.

Amara :i can never be yours,i belong to chidi now,i don't want you,now leave my house.

Maxwell smiled

Maxwell :Amara

Amara :don't you dare call my name,i don't want to hear you say my name,i can't be with you no matter how hard you try,it won't work,try and understand.

Maxwell raise the tone of his voice aggressively

Maxwell :i don't want to understand

Amara :maxwell please leave

Just then maxwell notice the ring on her finger,well chidi has proposed to amara previous day,maxwell look it the ring in shock

Maxwell :i know that's not my ring you are wearing, don't tell me that belongs to chidi

Amara was silent

Maxwell :Amara where is my ring

Amara was now so scared, she try to think of what to do

Maxwell :you dare remove my ring,do you really think it's over

Amara :maxwell you need to leave now or i will call the police

Maxwell :you will call the police and tell them what

Amara :just leave

Maxwell :am going no where Amara.

Amara quickly pick up her phone, she has took it earlier on when she was coming to the sitting room to open the door,she wanted to dial the police number, maxwell angrily took the phone from her and throw it to the floor.

Maxwell :you really want to call the police on me,right

Amara looked at him with fear

Maxwell:i am going to ask you one late time,did you take my ring off your finger and replace it with that thing there,

Amara was till speechless

Maxwell :i see you don't know what to say,right

Amara :get out of my house

Just then maxwell gave her two heavy slap on her face,Amara fall on the floor, tear drop down her cheek

Amara : maxwell please, just leave, i don't love you and can't love you,i had to remove it because it wasn't important to me anymore

Maxwell :stup your mouth up,you don't love me and you are telling me now,now Amara

Just then amara phone starts ringing, maxwell was curious to know who was calling so he went and pick up the phone but it was an unknown caller,he ended the call and was about to switch off the phone when the screen saver appeared,it was the picture chidi took when amara peak his on his cheek,chidi was the one that put it as screen saver and amara accepted it, this got maxwell more angry

Maxwell :you now kiss him,even saving him as your screen saver, tell me has he had sex with you

Amara knew things has gotten out of hand and worse, she try getting up

Maxwell :don't you dare stand up

Maxwell drop the phone and walk back to where amara is.

Amara :you have to stop all this, doing this won't make me love you

Maxwell :stup up your mouth

Kicking amara on her stomach, amare cried in pain holding her stomach, she then wish someone would come to her rescue, where was her Gateman,she had no idea.

Maxwell :stop telling me that,you have no right to say that

Maxwell kneel in front of her trying to kiss her

Maxwell :you are mine you belong to me

Amara push him away and sat up

Amara :stop this,please

Maxwell stood up and started unbutton his belt,Amara at once knew what he was up to

Amara :maxwell don't do this please, i beg you don't,

She started moving backward,she was till feeling pain in her stomach.

Maxwell :this time there is no escape for you your so call Gateman will be fest asleep by now because of the sleeping portion i gave to him,so if you want to pull this house down be my guest.

Amara tryed to run but maxwell got her and put her back in the floor and started to tore her nightgown

Maxwell :stop trying to resist me cause you can't

Amara was crying and shouting, she was trying to fight back.

Amara :maxwell, maxwell, stop,you are hurting me,stop,jesus

Amara bite his hand

Maxwell scearmed in pain

Maxwell:ahhhh....,you bite me

Maxwell began to slap her

Maxwell :the more you try to resist me the more pain you feel

Amara tryed her best to fight back but her power was no March for maxwell, after a little struggle maxwell succeeded in having his way on her,even if amara had have sax with chidi twice she till felt the pain,she keep pleading but it felted on deaf ears cause maxwell was busy enjoying himself on her,after some minutes maxwell was done.

Maxwell got up and sat on the floor, he checked his back pocket and brought out a packet of cigarettes,he light one and started smoking, Amara never knew he smokes but that wasn't her problem now, Amara was till on the floor couldn't believe what just happened, it till feels like a dream to her,she looked at maxwell with hatred, she was till crying bitterly

Amara :i hate you

Maxwell looked at her smiling,

Maxwell :sure you do

Maxwell got up and started dressing up.

Maxwell :you are so good,you know we should do this again,it will be fun don't you think so,don't worry i am not angry with you.

Maxwell bend down

Maxwell :even if you have gave chidi the pleasure of having you first, after so many years of dating you never allowed me,well don't worry when I finally kill him i will then know what to do with you.

Maxwell stood up

Maxwell :don't think this is over,because it just the beginning sweet heart, and for the record, you are the sweetest pu**y i have ever tasted

Maxwell laughed and left,Amara cried there bitterly, she was so in pain,she regretted ever knowing maxwell and she curse the day she met him.

Two weeks passed and amara was trying to pretend nothing happened to her,she didn't tell anyone but kept it to herself,she was till scared that maxwell might come back,so she had to stay in an hotel,she felt it more safer there,she even try to avoid chidi because she was now more scared for chidi life,and this got chidi so worried, she so much miss him but she had to do this maybe if maxwell find out that she and chidi are no longer seeing eachother he might forget of hurting chidi,chidi even try to see her at her work place but never succeeded, and sometimes try talking to her but she always gave him cold replies, to her that was the only way.

Amara was in her office when her secretary called telling her that Sandra wants to see her,it took some time before she agreed because if she delined to see her Sandra will be very angry with her and that she won't want because Sandra was a very good friend to her,Sandra enter the office, she doesn't seem happy,she sat down looking at amara.

Amara :please stop looking at me like that

Sandra :tell me one reason why I shouldn't, Amara what is wrong with you,i tryed calling you but you were ignoring my calls,amare

Amara :am really sorry, it just that i have been passing through a lot and i didn't want to disturb you with my problems

Sandra :and have i ever complained

Amara :and sorry okey

Sandra :my husband said chidi told him that you have been acting weird lately, giving him excuses when ever he wants to see you,he said you no longer stays at home,and each time he comes to your office he is always told by your secretary that he are not around which he knows you are,so Amara what is coming on.

Amara look sad

Amara :nothing serious

Sandra :i know you are ignoring chidi but why

Amara :i really don't know, but I feel if he is close to me his life will be in danger

Sandra was now confused

Sandra :i don't understand you,what is really going on with you,we are friends right,so you can tell me everything

Amara stood up and walk to her window looking outside the window

Sandra :Amara talk to me please

Amara :maxwell paid me visit two weeks ago

Sandra was shocked

Sandra :maxwell came to your house, but how come

Amara :i have no idea,he just came

Sandra :and you let him in

Amara turned to her

Amara :i never knew he was the one, it was late in the night when I heard my door bell rang,i actually thought it was that girl in the next compound because my Gateman wouldn't have allowed any one in except her.

Sandra key then

Amara :i opened the door and found maxwell, he forced himself in

Tear fell down her cheek, sandra was now curious to know the reason why she was crying

Sandra :amara why are you crying, what did maxwell do to you

Amara :he was so mad to hear that i accepted chidi proposal,he was even more mad when he saw this

Showing Sandra her phone, sandra looked at it,then got up,she knew something bad happened, she went to try and console her

Sandra :what happened

Amara :he hit so hard,i could barely breath,i thought then he could kill me,i was scared.

Sandra felt the pain she was going through, she hug her

Amara :i begged him to stop,i pleased with him,he was so hard on me.

Sandra :shhhhhh.....,don't speak further, i now understand what he did to you,am so sorry.

Amara :i hate him Sandra, i really do

Sandra :but why didn't you call me to tell me.

Amara :you were out of town and i didn't want to tell you on phone

Sandra is now angry

Sandra :that fool,no he must not go unpunished, we need to involve the police.

Amara :please no

Sandra :what is wrong with you,what is the meaning of no

Amara :please i don't want this to get to anyone ears,it should be between us,please

Sandra was speechless, she went and sat down

Sandra :so what about chidi,you can't keep suffering him like this,you need to set things right with him before he starts suspecting something.

Amara :Sandra,maxwell is obsesse with me,he wants me at all cost,he even threatened to kill chidi,i am so scared Sandra, what if he comes to look for me again, what will I do,i don't want anything to happen to chidi,i can't bear to see that happens.

Sandra :and you think avoiding chidi is the best way,come on amara,you have to be strong, sharing your problem with him will lighten up the whole thing.

Amara sat down,her head was full with so many things,how did she got herself into all this mess.

***TO BE CONTINUED ***

DROP YOUR COMMENTS AND
READ NEXT EPISODE

EPISODE 18

>>

sincerity [Read it]


be sincere please







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-01-18 21:20:04

776 Views



UNBELIEVABLE. [Read it]


Question for the guys... If this is your wife
how many children are you gonna have?







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-03 20:00:52

674 Views




***Nigerian English (NE) and British English (BE)
1... NE says- January ending
BE says- By the end of January
2... NE says- Longer throat
BE says- Greedy, salivate
3... NE says- N500 is a chicken change
BE says-N500 is a chicken feed
4... NE says- Next two weeks
BE says- In two weeks time
5... NE says- He bagged a degree at ABU
BE says- He was awarded a degree at ABU
6... NE says- The stone scattered my glass
BE says- The stone shattered my glass
7... NE says- He has packed to lagos
BE says- He has moved to lagos
8... NE says- What of your people?
BE says- How are your relations?
9... NE says- I only have N500
BE says- I have only N500
10... NE says- Barbing saloon
BE says- Barbers shop.
"Lets make it fun add yourz'' shey I don try abi??


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-10 14:32:43

208 Views




Steve lies dying, as Akpos his best friend, sits at his bedside.
Steve said: "Akpos", I've got to confess -- I've been sleeping with your wife for 30 years, I'm the father of 3 of your children including ur last daughter,"
Akpos reply: "Relax", and don't think another thing about it bc i already know all and thats why i put rat poison in ur drink last time.". U can confess that to Devil when u get there.




NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-22 07:04:41

374 Views



Finding a lover [Read it]


gbenga and idowu are friends.They have been friends since their childhood.they live in the same area,go to the same school and go to the same church

One day in the church idowu went to bolu a girl in the choir to correct her about eating chewing gum in the church and bolu smiled at him and told him wonders shall never end

When idowu got home he taught about bolu's word and began to generate feelings for her.he dreamt about her all night.

When he got to school he told his friend gbenga that he had feelings for bolu.gbenga advised him to woo bolu and idowu agreed .

The next sunday idowu heard that bolu and tope are fighting in the church and he went to bolu and asked her what causes the fight and bolu said they are not fighting.he went on and asked tope but tope told him it dosent concern him and idowu felt bad


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding
anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told
him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in
the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds
AND IT BETTER BE THERE!" The next morning he
got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough
there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the
driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and
ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in
the house. She opened it and found a brand new
bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since
Friday.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-12-05 23:03:57

582 Views



BREAKING NEWS [Read it]


BREAKING NEWS:the federal government of nigeria has announced that today is thursday 25th of june 2015,and tomorrow is Friday 26th of june 2015..thanks for listening..no public holiday


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-25 14:22:25

701 Views




Buy land. They ain’t making any more of this stuff.Related

There are many reasons to love Nigeria, but am going to list out few i know.
1. It is only in Nigeria that neighbours hate neighbours. When u are watching movie and all off a sudden light went off, instead of u to relax, u go carry ur face look outside come dey ask whether na only ur side de light go.
2. Una know say Niger mosquito no dey carry last, for my area mosquito no dey bite anyhow, them go 1st go ur wardrobe go check ur hiv status before them go put teeth for ur body.
3...................


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2017-01-01 19:55:01

534 Views



Stupid boy [Read it]


A boy went into a prostitutes house and said he wanted an AIDS's infected prostitute. The woman at reception said room 9 top of the hall.He went to the room and did his business.
When he was leaving she asked him why he wanted her she being aids infected.The boy answered,"When I go home i'll sleep with our maid then my dad will sleep with the maid then my dad will sleep with my mum then in the morning my mum will fuck the milkman and thats the BASTARD that ran over my dog.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-03-23 07:49:44

291 Views




Ek Baar Ek Aadmi Ke PENIS pe Madhu-Makkhi kaat gayi. He goes to a doctor with his wife.

Wife Sharmate Hue: Doctor Saab, Sirf Dard Ki Dawa Dena, Sujan Rehne Dena.Related

Tailor: neck kitni rakhni hai bahen ji ?

Ladki: itni deep rakho k ladke mere ball pe flat ho jay

Tailor: kamar ka nap kitna rakhu?

Ladki: itni fitting me karo ki ladko k muh se lar tapak jay

Tailor: hips ka nap kya rakhna hai bahen ji?

Ladki: itna tight rakho ki ladko ka muje dekh k khda ho jay



Tailor: Bc ..dress silvane aai hai ki apni Gand marvane .Related

Phoolon Ki Wadi Me Ho Basera Tera;

Sitaron Ke Aangan Mein Ho Ghar Tera;

Dua Hai Esh Dost Ki Ae Dost Tere Lia;

K Tujh Se Bhi Khubsurat Ho Naseb Tera!Related

A Nun woke up one morning feeling
great, she got out of bed and decided to
go to the kitchen for some breakfast. On her way over there, she runs into
sister Cynthia and she says, “Hi sister
Cynthia.” By which Sister Cynthia says, “I see you
got off on the wrong side of the bed
Sister." She did not understand what Sister
Cynthia meant by that so she ignored it
and went on. The Nun was passing by the garden
when she ran into sister Mary and she
says, “Good morning sister Mary, are
you having a great day?" Sister Mary says, “I see you got off on
the wrong side of the bed.” The Nun was wondering why everybody
she met kept saying that when she felt
great so she decides to go and see
mother superior. She asks Mother
Superior, “Everybody keeps telling me
that I got off on the wrong side of the bed when I feel great" Mother Superior says,”That is because
you have Brother Akpos shoes on.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-03-14 21:38:00

719 Views




Filmi Aashiq !!

?????: ??? ????? ????? ???? ???

?????: ???

?????: ?? ??????? ?? ???? ????? ?? ?????

?????: ????? ???? ???? ???? ?? ????? ???? ?????Related

funniology [Read it]


A
professor was travelling by boat, on
his way, he asked the sailor: do you
know biology? Ecology?? Zoology?
"No" said the sailor. The professor
got angry and said "what the hell do
you know, you will die of illiteracy"....
.an hour later, their boat started
sinking and the sailor turned to the
professor and asked, do you know
swimminology and escapeology from
sharkology "No" said the
professor..then the sailor said "well,
that means corocodilogy will eat your
headology because of your
mouthology.... Have a good
dayology"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-20 22:36:27

388 Views



news of the day [Read it]


It's not my fault







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-23 23:29:42

1351 Views




THE MISTAKE OF MY LIFE

EPISODE 2

Reginald soon woke up, ignored my greeting, washed his mouth and left the house without a word. I was terribly scared because of the way he looked at me. I knew it was just a matter of seconds before he kicks us out of his room. I sobbed quietly as I lamented my fate.

“My mates are all with their parents, enjoying their lives and planning for a brighter future. Here i’m suffering like a refugee I reasoned with tears. “only if I had listened to him months ago and terminated my baby, I wouldn’t be suffering in this manner". I said to myself bitterly. But deep down in my heart I equally knew I rejected to do his bidding because I couldn’t bear such guilt which would have been terrible and unbearable.

Akosua’s loud cry soon calmed me. I quietly carried her, changed her napkin, breastfed and sang a lullaby for her. He came in that moment eyeing us.
“Have you packed all your things?” he asked coldly.
I swallowed hard and stared at him pleadingly.
“please don’t do this to us” I begged,“we are already managing well, I’ll start a trade very soon” I added.

He scratched his head uneasily and again eyed me murderously,“do you call this life eeh? Abeg shut up that your dirty mouth” he barked, before grabbing all my clothes which he dumped inside an old large bag, fetched Akosua’s things and equally dumped them in it. “Here is two hundred and fifty Cedis it’s your transport fare to your parents house, I have tried enough for you, I won’t kill myself doing it mtcheeew” he muttered and threw the money at me.

Tears instantly fell uncontrollably from my eyes, I had no where to go.
I was doomed, I dropped Akosua on the bed, knelt and begged him “please Reginald, please” I begged again and again, but instead of my pleas to calm him, it infuriated him tremendously. He slapped me hard,grabbed the bag and threw it out of his room.

“I will do the same to you and this baby if you don’t leave peacefully” he threatened.
I stared at him heartbroken, and hungry, cursing the day I granted him access to my body. The story of my love life with Reginald really is a long one.

An affair which never should have happened in the first place had I ignored my heart, because he really had nothing to offer me, yet I foolishly fell in love with him. A very stupid teenage love affair which I now regret.

Love dosen’t work in an empty stomach, neither does it work in an unsecured environment.
Reginald wasn’t in love with me any longer because circumstances changed and he only saw me as a burden to his miserable life.

He totally ignored Akosua’s cries, my pleas and our neighbours preachings as he pushed us out of his house that fateful morning.
A day I was supposed to be happy because it was my birthday.


What happens next?
WATCH OUT FOR EPISODE 3


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Akpors was tired of d city gurls,so he went to his village to look for a decent one.He founded a real woman and paid her bride price and then brought her back to lagos.when he wanted to make love to her he asked her to go and shave her bushy pubic hair the gurl replied and said"oga me i no fit do am o na because of this all the guys for our village dey call me"NKECHI AFRO".Apkors fainted.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-11-21 19:16:08

694 Views



i asked God [Read it]


I asked God to take away my pride. And God said
“No”.
He said it was not for him to take away, but for me to
give it up.
I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.
And God said “No”.
He said her spirit was whole, her body was only
temporary.
I asked God to grant me patience. And God said “No”.
He said patience is a by-product of tribulations. It isn’t
granted, it is earned.
I asked God to give me happiness. And God said
“No”.
He said he gives me blessings, happiness is up to me.
I asked God to spare me pain. And God said “No”.
He said suffering draws you apart from worldly cares
and brings you closer to me.
I asked God to make my spirit grow. And God said
“No”.
He said I must grow on my own. But he will prune me
to make me fruitful.
I asked for all things that I might enjoy life. And God
said “No”.
He said I will give you life, that you may enjoy all
things.
I ask God to help me LOVE others, as much as he
loves me.
And God said, Ah, finally you have the idea.



NAIRAJOKES.COM




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JOKE PART 14 BY DINDY
Dindy: Baby.
Girl: Yes dear.
Dindy: I know one day you will leave lagos.
Girl: Yes.
Dindy: When you leave will you remember me?.
Dindy: please dear be honest with me, you know I love you so much.
Girl: Dear I can never ever forget you, I love you so much more than anything.
Dindy: (smiles) thanks dear.
Dindy: But baby what will you remember me as?.
Girl: one of my ATM machines…….lol.
#DINDY WROTE THIS
Facebook username: Ossy Andy Nnamdi
Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433
Watch out for part 15.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-09-19 19:15:10

246 Views




At a party Guy : This is Harbhajan Mann, Gurdas Maan, Babbu Maan, Sherry Maan

Himesh Reshammiya : Kitne Armaan MAAN MAAN MAAN MAANRelated

There was a day,A friend of mine went 2 lagos to spend his holidays with his brother in Lagos,unfortunately he start earing his brother talking of (second semenstar)in lagos,An he went there to buy phone or swap phone with one broken phone with no battery in his hand, he swap with 3,000,c1 Shinco phone.unfortunately The swap man said police police an they all ran, on his way home he discovered that the phone he bought was an ordinary case with pen torch an he scream Haaaaaaaaa(eko to gba mi loju oooo).


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-03 00:09:49

665 Views



Advice needed [Read it]


Advice plz, i was taking a shit and i saw my gf coming i quickly wiped my ass and unknown to me there was shit on my finger, when she saw it she made a face and asked what is that and i said groundnut past, she then said i want to lick. What do i do?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-01-04 14:28:06

327 Views




Things always get worse before they get better. You have to just keep going!Related

I was passing by the village football field this evening. A player played a penalty and the keeper caught the ball. Fans started clapping and shouting "Cech! Cech! Cech!". Within a twinkle of an eye, another player played a heavy shot outside the 18 and the ball entered the net. The fans went mad. They were all shouting "Lampard! Lampard! Lampard! Lampard!". At this time, I became fully interested in the match. Just few seconds for the final whistle, a player trapped the ball, dribbled the first defended. As if that was not enough, He finished the second defender. Rubbish the last defender and useless the keeper and finally score the wining goal. Fans where shouting on top of their voices. Guess the name they were shouting?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-19 21:20:50

559 Views



Birthday Cake [Read it]


Oga decided to surprise his wife with her Birthday gift. He
took all day to bake a cake in the shape of a big
HEART with the help of the maid. The maid asked him
what the shape meant and he simply said, "LOVE".
Madam came back shouting at the maid who she met
sleeping.
Madam: Will u get up now! Stupid girl what have u
been doing since morning?
Maid: Madam abeg no vex, Me & Oga dey make LOVE
since morning na just now now we finish I say make I
lie down rest small. Madam fainted.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-02-17 10:49:52

754 Views




Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

~ Oscar WildeRelated

Money speaks sense in a language all nations understand.Related

Ek Baar Gaanv Mein Bade Budhon Ko Padhane Ki Government Ne Scheme Chalai.

Ek Class Mein Teacher Padhane Laga Aur Bola: “A For Apple, B For Ball, C For Cat”

Lekin Wo Bechare Samajh Nahi Pa Rahe The To Teacher Ne Dehati Tarike Se Padhana Theek Samjha Aur Padhana Shuru Kiya.

Teacher Bola: “A For Arshad Ki Maan, B For Begum Ki Maan, M For Mahmood Ki Maan, N For Nasruddin Ki Maan, Z For Zahid Ki Maan”

Aise Hi Padha Kar Ek Din Test Lene Ki Sochi, Teacher Ne Board Par W Likhkar Ek Ko Khada Karke Puchha.

Teacher: “Batao Ye Kya Hai?”

Ek Utha Aur Bola: “Ji Ye Lag To Mahmood Ki Maan Rahi Hai Lekin Iski To Koi Taangon Ko Ulta Kar Gaya“Related

Dream touches your heart and soul. It is a magical memory that unites fantasy and reality. Hope you’ll have the sweetest dream tonight.

Good Night!Related

Breaking News:

Vin Diesel to name his son as Vin Petrol!Related

There is a raffle at the local Jewish Community Centre and prizes are being drawn.

“4th prize, which goes to Hymie, is a BMW Royce.”

Huge applause. Hymie goes up to collect his keys and shake hands.

“3rd prize, which goes to Jacob, is a BMW and a cheque for ?20,000.”

Huge applause. Frank goes up to collect his keys and cheque and shake hands.

“2nd prize, which goes to Abe, is a piece of fruit cake!”

Ghastly silence. Abe goes up to the stage to the presenter.

“What do you mean, a piece of fruit cake? 4th prize was a BMW, 3rd prize was a BMW plus a cheque for ?20,000, so what the hell do you mean a piece of fruit cake for the second prize?”

“Ah,” says the presenter, “This is special fruit cake. It`s made by the Rabbi`s wife”

“F**k the Rabbi`s wife” says Abe, hysterically.

“What? You want the 1st prize as well?” came the replyRelated
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