Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:

My Sweet Love [Read it]


Since the first day she became mine. She had been so faithful. I LOVE her with all my heart. So reliable and trust worthy. She never fail me. I can't stop thinking about her. My future depends so much on her that's why I spend minimum of 20hrs with her each day. I must confess that I can't do without her. I can even risk my life for her. She feeds and cloth me. Without her there will be nothing like Nairajokes.com. I can't even write this post without her being there for me. Oh my angel, my baby oku, my sweet potato, Onunu ugu m, Oyoyo nwa. My African Queen. Your black is beautiful.
Am talking about no other person but my one and only HP 655 Laptop.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-07 10:27:45

1035 Views




It was around 6 am when John woke up, he
tried to get up and say his morning prayers
when he noticed that TJ, his childhood
friend had slept with his leg over his chest,
he pushed his leg aside and cursed TJ ”
when you go
dey drink too much “, Adebayo John was a
23 year old corper who hailed from Ogun
state , he
and his friend Timmy Johnson 23 whom also
hailed from Ogun state have been together
since childhood, they both attended the
same primary school, secondary school and
university, and surprisingly they were both
posted to Enugu state for their NYSC. They
had finished their NYSC and were going
back home that
morning, John was not really excited that
morning because he was returning home to
his busy
father who never had time for him and his
mean step mother who hated him because
he was the only male child in the family,
John’s mother had left him with his father
because he was a drunkard and beat her up
every time he drank, he had met John’s step
mother at a club where he usually drank.
John quickly said
his prayers and went to have his bath, when
he came back TJ was still sleeping, John
kicked
him and said mumu you no go go bath, TJ
then said ‘were’ and went out to have his
bath.
John had finished dressing up when TJ
came in, John was dressed in his Corper
outfit, while
waiting for TJ to finish dressing up he took
his time to cross check his luggage, he then
remembered that he had not picked up his
novel, at least that would entertain him
throughout the long journey to Lagos.
John and TJ went to have their breakfast of
moin–moin and pap at mama Nkechi’s
‘buka’, they then set out to the main road to
look for a taxi to take them to the motor
park, they waited for about 7
minutes before they saw a taxi, after a
minute
of negotiating the taxi driver then agreed to
take them there for 200 naira, they then set
off on the 15 minutes journey to the motor
park,
John looked sideways at TJ, TJ was the last
born of a rich family of 3 girls and he was
the only male child, his 3 sisters were based
in
the U.S with their mother, while his father
was a busy business man who rarely spent a
week without traveling, TJ was handsome,
he
was the ladies guy but he was not brilliant
in terms of academics, he graduated with a
second class
lower, TJ also had a knack for getting into
trouble.
They got to the park and alighted then
settled their taxi driver, it was then TJ tried
hiding his face when he sighted somebody in
the garage, John noticed TJ’s action and
asked oh boy wetin happen? TJ said: padi
mi na one of
those girls I see o, make we do quick go
enter bus, they hurriedly entered a bus with
a Lagos
sign on it, while in the bus TJ put his head
on the seat to hide his face.
John, still a little bit surprised asked, which
girl be that? TJ with his head still on the
chair, it’s
one of those girls who claimed I
impregnated them, John burst into an
uncontrolled laughter which attracted some
passengers in the
bus, so you dey run from your responsibility
abi?
Which kind responsibility? Na only me they
dey follow sleep? If she see me for here she
go hook
me down come embarass me for this park.
Luckily for TJ the last passanger entered
and they set off, but TJ still had his head on
the chair,
John with a smile on his face tapped TJ on
his head and said Baba Junior carry your
head up,
TJ grinned and said you don dey craze.
John checked his wrist watch, they had set
off around 8 am, John then took a moment
to survey the faces of those in the bus, they
were six corpers in the bus including them, 4
guys and 2 girls, one of the girls of which he
knew,
her name was Joy and she was one the few
girls he admired.
Joy Parker was epitome of
beauty, she was an half-caste, her father
was from England and her mother was from
Nigeria, John had seen a lot of girls in his
lifetime but he could swear she was the
most beautiful girl he had ever seen, after a
while John picked up his novel and got
busy, he was reading the broker by John
Gresham, he was in the 5th
chapter when something happened. Suddenly
the woman beside him had an asthma
attack, as she tried to use her inhaler it fell
outside the bus through the window, John
immediately shouted at the driver to stop,
when the bus finally came to a halt, John
got down
and sprinted back in search of the inhaler,
he ran for about 50 metres before sighting
the inhaler, when he picked it up he ran
back to
the bus like a mad man and handed the
inhaler back to the woman, she then used it
and it
stopped the attack in a matter of seconds,
John looked sideways only for him to see
that Joy was staring at him, John was
immediately taken aback by her captivating
beauty, she had a
light skin and beautiful brown eyes, they
had eye contact for about 5 seconds before
Joy
finally looked away smiling , after the
woman had calmed down she thanked John
for his help
and prayed for him.
Joy knew a trustworthy guy
when she saw one and to her John would be
trustworthy, she had only seen him a few
times around camp but there was something
about him that interested her, after being
cheated on by her ex boyfriend, Joy decided
that she was done with Nigerian men but
may be John was an
exception. TJ was glad he was returning
home, home for him meant he could go out
with
his father’s cars, go clubbing, bring home
girls and move at his own free will, he
remembered
his ordeal with different girls with different
sizes, shapes and skin colour, he was a
player
unlike his friend John, he felt sorry for John
who didn’t really know what fun was like,
his attention was drawn back by the
screams
of the people in the bus, when he looked to
see what was happening TJ said “Ooo damn

because trouble was ahead of them right in
front of them stood six armed men, the
driver thought about making a run for it but
thought again when he saw a plank full of
nails right in front of him, he had no option
but
to stop the bus, the armed men ordered
them all out of the bus, and asked them to
surrender all
their valuables and money, the passengers
immediately began to comply, the only thing
John could think of at that moment was
the safety of Joy, he hoped the men would
do nothing more than collect their money
and leave
them alone but he was wrong, the woman
who had an asthma attack earlier suddenly
fainted, no one dared go to her aid, the
leader of
the armed men ordered the corpers and four
other passengers into the bus where they
were blindfolded, the next thing John heard was gunshots as the remaining passengers were killed in cold blood, the driver of the bus
tried to escape but got six bullets into his
back as a result of his action, the men then got into the bus and drove off, John’s heart started to beat fast he was half glad that Joy and T.J were in the bus with him, though he didn’t know this men but he knew one thing about them:

“don’t mess with them “, TJ had his heart in
his mouth, he had never had a gun pointed at him before, he didn’t know where these men
were taking them to but he knew it could
not be good.


Should the story continue ?







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Akrpos was taking a bath in the river,  and the elephant found him necked,  so the elephant asked him,  dude how do you manage to breathe in that little thing, 
Akrpos replied;  this is only for Emergency,  in danger are


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-07 02:18:56

736 Views




I can`t see any value in being a celebrity, famous for being famous.

-Noomi RapaceRelated

Episode 2

i couldn’t believe what i saw. A guy was bouncing on her rudely and i heard her moan like crying dog. They didn’t even notice my presence because of the high volume of the music. I couldn’t stop looking at how the muscular guy was rushing in and out of my friend. He leaned on her like a dove and Linda on the other hand was moaning in an excitement. I banked the door behind me and left to my car. ” what kind of s-x is this?? I asked myself. A question i intend to ask Linda after her match. I was filled with mixed feelings, i was the lonely type and the guys that i had as friends never thought of approaching me in any romantic form. And those that could also held back because of my prestige, my achievement and my family name, Hagan. Was it fear that was driving them away? Or i don’t have time for myself? Which ever way it could turn out to be, i don’t care, my career awaits me and not a s-x relationship. It was Monday morning and i was still waiting for the engineer to arrive. He wasn’t coming after several minutes of waiting. I left to my room and before i could know it, my mother called that he was in. I wore my sleepers quickly and rushed downstairs like a hungry cat. It was asif i was going to hug him when i got to him. “you?!” the word came from me unexpectedly. The excitement went down like a cartoon. He stood quiet before me after recalling what happened in school. ” i just need to tell my mother we need another engineer here” i noted while walking towards the kitchen. ” no please? He stretched his hands to get hold of mine. I turned sharply and gave him that look. The look of ” will you leave me alone before i smack your face?” ” sorry ma’am” he apologise and let go. It sounded funny as i heard him call “ma’am”. As if i can be his madam or mother. I think he said that out of fear because of the look i gave him. I smiled to myself without his notice. ” you better be!” i said rudely and left,Upstairs again. I heard my mother talking to me, she thought i was around but i didn’t reply her because i was far from her and that isn’t a good idea either. Guess why i was irritated when i saw him? We are both in the university studying which ever course i don’t really know about. This guy went round telling people that he was dating me, without even knowing me inperson. He doesn’t even know how i look, all he was interested in, was my name. He only used my name and excellence to brag about on campus. After my friends finding out about the issue, they played a prank on him to befriend me without his knowledge

>>

“Your infection looks like the stubborn type,” the doctor said
after I complained about the inefficacy of the drugs he
prescribed. “Really?” I asked looking worried. “Yes,” the
doctor replied. “Hope you took the drugs as prescribed?”
“Yes I did but the symptoms didn’t disappear,” I replied. The
doctor cringed his face in thought. If only I could tell him
that my problem wasn’t physical but supernatural. I sat back
and stared on. The doctor conducted a second pelvic
examination and noticed that the area had grown worse.
“This is unbelievable,” he muttered to himself while I wore
back my clothes. This time he gave me an injection and
wrote another set of drugs for me and I thanked him and
left. It wasn’t until I came back the third time a week later
with more severe symptoms that he recommended that I go
for HIV test. It must have skipped his memory the first and
the second time but not the third time. Reluctantly, I
collected the form for the test and headed for the lab. I
didn’t know initially that the form was for HIV test till I got to
the lab and some nurses started counselling us. I felt like
turning back and postponing the test till a later date. After
the counselling, we went in one after the other to have our
blood samples collected and tested. My legs trembled as I
sat on the bench waiting for the result to come out. I was
seated on the bench deep in thought when someone tapped
me from behind and I turned and saw Stella, my former
roommate, seating behind me and waiting for her own
result. She had so much emaciated and her cheek and collar
bones stood out. “What are you doing here?” I stupidly asked
raising my brow. “The same thing you’re doing here,” she
retorted looking away. The atmosphere was tense and we
didn’t know what to discuss. “Hope everything is fine?” I
asked. “Yes it is,” she replied. “And you?” “Fine too,” I replied
and faced my front afterwards. Thirty minutes later, the
results came out and one of the nurses called me to come
inside and collect mine. My heart thumped about recklessly
within my chest as I went in to collect the result. The nurse’s
face had this blank expression on it that betrayed no
emotion. I was visibly trembling as the nurse handed the
white piece of paper to me. It took me 20minutes to gather
courage and look at the result. Many things ran through my
mind: my family, my mother, my academics, my unspent
cash in the bank, my properties and on and on. How would I
explain to my mum that I ended up HIV positive? My legs
wobbled as the thought ran through my mind. At long last, I
peered into the white piece of paper and behold, I was HIV
negative…
____________
I went back to
the doctor with the result beaming with smiles and looking
relieved. “It came out negative right?” The doctor asked
smiling back at me. “Yes doc it did,” I replied still smiling.
I handed the white sheet of paper to him and he looked at it
and nodded happily. The doctor then wrote a third set of
drugs for me and I thanked him and went home

>> Episode 49 -

Stella Walsh (born Stanislawa Walasiewiczowna in Poland) won the 1932 women’s 100 metres dash. When she was killed in 1980, the post-mortem revealed one big surprise – she was a man!Related

```???????????? Can't laugh alone (I saw my neighbour fighting his friend) But Some people can be very annoying sha..????????????
How will you borrow somebody's cloth and then slim fit it?```


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-10-03 13:46:58

426 Views




Muriel: where is my son?i want to see him
Joan: mom;relax
Muriel: how can i relax?when he is the only thing i have got
Joan: doctor Truth;how is my husband?
Truth: Joan;the truth be told;he was badly injured but lets pray he survive
Muriel: doctor please do anything to make sure my son survive because i will die if anything happen to him
Joan: mom;please stop it.
Muriel: can i see my son
Truth: sure;you can. ward 3
Joan: thank you(they walked into the room)
Muriel: my son;who ever did this to you;it will not be well with the person
Joan: mom;stop crying;if you are crying what will i and Ruth do
Muriel: i am not crying oh(enter a policeman and a boy)is he the suspect
Joan: mom
Muriel: will you leave me alone(she walked to the boy and slapped him twice)you will pay for this
Policemen: madam;he is not the one
Joan: then who is he?
Boy: i was there when it happen
Muriel: so tell us who did it
Boy: some hours before the incident a girl walked into the garden close to my house and a car was following her behind but when she walked into the garden the car disappear and later i saw she and this man come out but is like they were having lovers quarrel and all of a sudden i saw that same car but this time the man came out and attack the lady but he(point at Luke)try to defend her but he couldn't because the man has come with two strong men and they beat him up even when he struggle with them
Joan: Jude;did this to my husband?
Boy: i don't know him ma
Joan: he will hear from me(she walked out)
Muriel: Joan;i am sorry my son
Boy: is okay ma
Policemen: do you know the person we are talking about?
Muriel: don't worry about that for now. all i want is for my son to get better
Policemen: okay;just when you are ready inform me
Muriel: okay;thank once again
Policemen: excuse us(exit Policemen/Boy)
Muriel: son;please wake up(curtain)


Jude: wake up(Jude pour water on her)stop sleeping like a princess;when you are not one(she open her eyes)good girl
Loveth: where am i?
Jude: where you belong,in my house
Loveth: just take me to my parent
Jude: what for?
Loveth: at least;let me go tell them that i am returning to my prison
Jude: you will do that but not today
Loveth: why?
Jude: from now on;you not allowed to go out or visit friends or family without me
Loveth: Jude;why don't you just kill me?
Jude: if i kill you;i will be easing your pains
Loveth: i beg you let me go
Jude: you wish(he walked away and she cry her eyes out)
Joan: open this gate
Liz: how may i help you?
Joan: don't you know me ma?i am Luke's wife
Liz: i know;just what are you doing here(enter Jude)
Joan: i came to warn your son to stay away from my husband because if anything happen to my husband....
Jude: what will you do?
Joan: you think i don't know that you hurt my husband because of your prostitute of a wife
Jude: i did not hurt anyone but(enter Lucas)if something happen to;it is all his fault. when one choose to dance to a music,he must as well learn the beat of the song. your husband is no match for me but he choose to dance with the spirit when he is mortal
Joan: you are evil
Jude: whom among the both of us is evil?me that is protecting my wife from a predator or a desperate woman;who will do anything to get a man
Joan: you are insane(she slapped him twice)you will hear from me(she walked away)
Lucas: what is going on?
Liz: Jude;i don't understand. did you hurt him?
Jude: i just teach him a lesson;so that next time he will know how to behavior in a lion's den
Lucas: hold on;don't tell me you hurt my son?
Jude: i am your son also right?
Liz: what if he tell on you?
Jude: no evidence;no witness and no case
Lucas: if anything happen to my son;i will personally kill you(he walked away)
Liz: i will protect you son
Jude: mom;you don't have to be scared

Grace: where is my daughter?
Lambert: relax;she will be back
Grace: i cant hold it anymore,is unlike her;she doesn't stay out this late and her number is not going through
Lambert: woman;she will be fine
Grace: i just don't want anything to happen to her
Lambert: relax
Grace: i will take your word(curtain)


Jude: get up and dress up
Loveth: where are we going to?
Jude: to your mom
Loveth: yes;lets go and i will tell her everything
Jude: you dare not;because if i can do horrible things to my supposed brother than i wouldn't think twice before cutting your parents throat in piece
Loveth: please don't do anything to my parents. i beg you,anything you want me to do i will gladly do it,just keep my love ones out of this
Jude: good;you will tell your parents that we have made up and you are coming back to me because you love me. am i understood
Loveth: yes
Jude: good;make sure you eat and look good because if your parent find out that i am forcing you;then you are in soup
Loveth: i will do as you want
Jude: good for you(curtain)



Joan: mom;please go home;i will take care of him
Muriel: no;i don't want to. i want to be here when my son wakes up. i want to always be my him side. i may not be able to take it because i have really been a good mother to him
Joan: you did your best
Muriel: every time he is in pain;i just couldn't do anything;i just let him experience it all by himself. what kind of a mother i am?i cause his pains
Joan: mother enough
Muriel: i am sorry my daughter,i promise i wouldn't cry again. i promise
Joan: instead of crying;lets pray for him
Muriel: yes;he will be fine(curtain)

Lambert: little princess;where have you been and why is that ragamuffin with you?
Loveth: dad;he is my husband and we both have settle our difference
Lambert: really so?
Jude: yes sir
Lambert: but before you went out;you did not show any signs of missing your husband
Loveth: dad;we just talked it over
Lambert: okay
Grace: you are lying. Loveth;i know you
Loveth: mom;please,don't tell me you are missing me already,that you don't want me to go
Grace: my Love
Lambert: woman;let her be
Grace: fine;i will but Loveth let me have a word with you first
Loveth: alright mom
Lambert: sit;i will let my daughter go with you since that is what she want but if you make a mistake of hurting her again;i will not think twice before ending this marriage and this is the last chance i am giving you
Jude: i promise it wouldn't happen again(back to Loveth)

Grace: why are you going back to him?
Loveth: i just do not want to bring disgrace to you and dad
Grace: you do not want to bring disgrace to us or you do not want him to hurt that boy
Loveth: mother
Grace: go on and tell me;i see no reason why you have to continue torturing yourself because the boy in question is married and if he want to kill him then let him
Loveth: mom;i can't take it. even at this point i don't know if he is dead or still alive
Grace: what do you mean by that?
Loveth: i was with him when Jude attack us;mom Jude;is evil. he can kill
Grace: then leave him
Loveth: i cant mom,i have failed when i got involved with him and this is.....
Grace: baby.....
Loveth: mom;let it be;if i do survive this then i will never die again. goodbye mom
Grace: my daughter(back to Jude)
Loveth: come on lets go
Jude: after you
Loveth: bye dad
Lambert: bye(curtain)


Muriel: Luke;son please wake up(she cry and Lucas walked in)i beg you son(Lucas touch her shoulder)who are you?
Lucas: i am sorry;you were deep in thought
Muriel: what are you doing here?
Lucas: i came to check on you and my son
Muriel: of cause;we are doing just fine and tell that son of yours to pray really hard that my son come out of the comma because if he doesn't i will kill your son myself. so get out(she pushed him)i said get out
Lucas: i am sorry;Muriel
Muriel: keep your sorry to yourself by the time i am done with you and your son;you will be sorry for yourself. get out
Lucas: Muriel
Muriel: leave before i arrest you
Lucas: fine;i will(exit Lucas)
Muriel: useless people(curtain)


Loveth: good day ma
Liz: what is good about the afternoon?
Loveth: a lot of things,like the air you breath because there are some people who which to stay alive but they are not given the opportunity to
Liz: so you are happy that you are living this miserable life
Loveth: i am okay that i have a miserable life but you;are you okay with your suppose perfect life?
Liz: you are so rude
Loveth: i am not;just been honest
Liz: leave this house you prostitute;your mother did not give you a good home training that is why you are flirting with married man
Loveth: yes i am a prostitute and you are the best mother;who teaches her(enter Lucas)son how to rape girls and force his love on people who doesn't love he;a son that go about get others to beat up his own brother and leaving him half dead;a son that is capable of murdering his unborn baby because he is a monster. tell me;who is the bad mother now?(Liz slapped her)
Lucas: woman stop it
Liz: let me tell this girl;you should be grateful that my son decided to pull you from your shameful life by not divorcing you and if you think my son love you then you are mistake because he hate you and that is why you will remain in pains all your life and no one will save you for the wrath of me and my son(she pushed her and walked away)
Loveth: i hate it
Lucas: my daughter;take it easy
Loveth: i am sorry sir
Lucas: is okay
Loveth: did you see your son?
Lucas: i saw him from afar but his mom did not allow me to come close to my son
Loveth: how is he?
Lucas: he is still in comma
Loveth: i cause it;please forgive me
Lucas: is not your fault my daughter
Loveth: what will you do now that his mom had deprive you for seeing him?
Lucas: i will not give up on him;i will always visit the hospital till she allow me
Loveth: i pray he get better
Lucas: i pray so too(curtain)


Joan: mom;Ruth has been disturbing me that she want to see her dad;so i decided to bring her here
Muriel: is okay;where is she?
Joan: she is outside
Muriel: go on and bring her in
Ruth: grandma
Muriel: how are you?
Ruth: i am not fine because dad is not fine
Muriel: baby please be fine for your dad;so that when he wakes up. he will not be mad at grandma for not taking good care of you
Ruth: okay grandma(she cried)grandma stop crying because dad will be mad at me too;if you are sad
Muriel: oh my dear(enter Lucas)you again
Ruth: grandpa;come
Muriel: Ruth;
Ruth: grandma;please let grandpa
Muriel: fine;you can stay
Ruth: thank you grandma(she kissed him)you are the best
Muriel: you can sit
Lucas: i am sorry
Muriel: is not your fault
Lucas: you have to take it easy on yourself
Muriel: this is the first time;my son doesn't talk to me;when i talk to him. we argued but we always settle it because we can't stay mad at each other. anytime we fight over anything;he will always sing this song mad by neyo and then we make up.
Lucas: you two really have a lot of memories
Muriel: yes;he was my husband;my son;my best friend. he will tell me everything,not a secret when he was in love and when he was heartbroken,he always tell me. we talk together and those time i got downhearted he was here for me. he always put me first and now that he is in this situation,i just feel useless because i can't do anything to help him(she continue crying)
Lucas: shoe(she stared at him)i am sorry
Muriel: is okay;have you inform your son about what he did to my son
Lucas: he know alright but he is a monster
Muriel: i just pray my son get better
Lucas: he will be fine(curtain)




SEE MORE......



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Bus scene,
A man staring at a girl.Conductor: ticket ticket ticket! Sahab, satyamev jayate fir se…Man: *slaps* BC biwi hai ye meri
Jo Samjha Thoko LikeRelated

Slap Galour [Read it]


I went to a cinema with Akpos, on getting to the cinema we saw a bald
guy, I showed the guy to Akpos and said “Look at fresh head, this one
is good to slap, but I’m afraid of the guy’s face”.
Akpos then said to me “Baba T, you fear a lot, I will slap that head and nothing will happen”.
I dared him to do it and he went to where the guy was sitting and
gave him a HOT SLAP on his head. The guy was surprised, and wanted to
react, then Akpos said “Baba T, so you are here, and we have been
looking for you at home!”
The guy responded “I’m not Baba T, maybe we look alike”, Akpos murmured “maybe.”
After some minutes In the cinema, Akpos called me again and said
“BabaT, I will slap that guy again and nothing will happen.” I answered
“ok”
He went to the guy, gave him a hot slap and said “BabaT stop lying, I
say na u be dis…” The guy said to him angrily “I’m not Bros Feranmi,
please, let me be”.  The guy then left that seat and went to the front
seat.
After some minutes Akpos called me and said “BabaT, I will slap that
guy again and nothing will happen.” This time i told him that “if
anything happens, I will pretend I don’t know him.”
He stood up, went to the front seat, gave the guy a very hot slap and
said “BabaT, so na here you dey, I come dey slap another person for
back!”
Do you think Akpos can try it one more time and go scot-free again?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-01-07 07:38:02

472 Views




make una no vex na one stupid hostel mistress collect my phone.am even borrowed phone.(episode 6) i got to school the following day,dapo has arrived but he is not in the class,i settled down and started reading my novel,3 min later i heard the sound of the bell,we all rush out for the morning devotion*after the morning devotion we settled down inside our various classes,i saw dapo coming in,he looked like a star,he had changed his hairstyle to afro,the style really suits him.dapo:good morning(showing his white teeth). me:good morning (i said playfully) where were you before? dapo:like you care?(looking naughty). me:never mind (disappointed) dapo:i was with that cheap girl.me:who? dapo:damy.me:wow! what does she told you? dapo:why should i tell you? me:please na,at least we are free today!(one of the teacher's husband passed away). dapok! she just said that she likes me,i am handsome etc, i dont care about those things,cos i will just screep her.me:meaning what. dapowhispering)it means sex.me: haa dapo!


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Teacher: Write down how will you create a Binary Tree?

Pappu: By sowing a binary seed.Related

In 2020 girl:”Dekh yar kya item
jaa raha
hai.. Oye Murgey Tera mobile No..
Kya
hai.. ??
.
.
.
.
Boy:”Aap ke ghar me baap, bhai
nai hai
kya.. ??
.
.
.
Girl:”baap n bhai sab hai, par tu
nai hai na
chikne…Related

Riddle [Read it]


Out of eater come something to eat, out of strong come something sweet.
(....1 : 14 segduj )


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-04 03:20:27

297 Views



Car brake [Read it]


Car Brake
AKPOS: Hi Kwame, I need your Help!
KWAME: How can I help you?
AKPOS: Please, I want to test if the BRAKE of my Car is still working.
KWAME: How can I be of help here?
AKPOS: Please, just stay at the front of the car while I drive towards you.
KWAME: Ok.
After Some Minutes, Kwame was rushed to the hospital with broken legs while Akpos is now in the Police Station.
Please, who is the FOOL here, Akpos or Kwame?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-14 20:56:41

597 Views




A guy was comin from lagos to onitsha via nite bus when dey encountered armed robbers on d way dey stoped dem and asked dem to come down wen dey diddey began to ask for moni if u dont have dey will ask ur name nd den kill u so wen it gt to my guyz turn he ws shocked he could nt ulter a word so dey set him aside it got to d turn of one woman they asked watz ur name nd d woman said nancy d armed rober said hmm u bear my sisters ame so fr dat i wont kill u step aside n nxt person was a man dey asked his name d man said hmm my name is SOUGHT but my friends nd family call me nancy o ......pls one word fr dis guy


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-24 00:03:21

401 Views




Me – “Maa! Kyu na ek Kutta paal le ??”

Mom – “Tu pal raha hai,wohi bohot hai!!”

*Cries*

*Barks*Related

The day before my appointment I was a bundle of nerves. I'd swapped shifts at work so I wouldn't have to work that day or the next. The more nervous I got the more I seemed to stuff up at work so I decided to stay home. Reece had called me twice today but I'd been avoiding her. She knew me better than anyone else and she knew there was something wrong.

The house was quiet. I was on my own. Everyone was out and I was trying to keep myself occupied with some reading but after reading the same page three times I still had no idea what was going on so I gave up and went into the kitchen.

The doorbell rang and I frowned. I hadn't been expecting anyone and when I opened he door to find Grey I was a little surprised to see him.

"Alex isn't here," I told him.

"I know. I needed to talk to you," he said.

"As long as it isn't another lecture."

He shook his head and I shrugged. If it wasn't about that then the least I would do is listen to what he had to say. I'd successfully avoided the conversation about our kiss. Was that what he wanted to talk about? Suddenly I felt a little nervous.

Stepping back I allowed him in. He followed me into the living room. I sat down as he ran a hand through his hair but he didn't sit down. Instead he stood in front of me looking agitated. It was so weird to see him like this. Usually he was confident and self-assured.

"What do you want to talk about?" I eventually asked when the silence stretched.

"How close are you and Aiden?" he blurted out and I frowned. I hadn't expected that.

"We're close," was my answer. It wasn't a lie but I was sure he would take it entirely a different way.

I wasn't sure why I wouldn't come clean and tell him that we were just friends. Maybe I wanted him to think I'd moved on. It was better than being loser who was still in love with him. He shoved his hands into the front pocket of his jeans while he studied me for a moment.

"I know this is probably none of my business but I need to ask you something," he said.

"Are you being careful?" he asked. I had no idea what he was talking about.

"I'm not sure I know what you're talking about," I said frowning.

He let out a deep breath.

"Are you and Aiden being 'careful'?" he clarified. When my mind registered what he was asking my mouth dropped open in shock. Of all the things I'd expected I hadn't expected that.

It took me a few moments as he watched me expectantly to get over the shock. I stood up feeling angry that he'd asked me something like that.

"You have no right to ask me a question like that," I said struggling to keep my temper under control. It was shocking that he thought Aiden and I were that close.

"I just want to make sure that you don't make a mistake that you'll have to live with for the rest of your life," he explained. I put my hands on my hips as I glared at him.

"I have a brother already Grey. I don't need another one," I snapped. This was the type of behavior I expected from my brother not from his best friend.

"Is it so bad that I care and I don't want you to make a stupid mistake," he explained with a shrug.

"Yes. You need to stop meddling in my life," I yelled at him and his jaw twitched as he clenched it closed.

He was like family but he wasn't my older brother. Come to think of it I wouldn't allow my brother to meddle either. I was eighteen, an adult. I could make my own decisions even if some of them resulted in mistakes.

There was no way I was going to tell him that I'd never been with anyone before. It wasn't something he needed to know.

I didn't want him to play the protective brother role. The role I wanted him to play in my life he didn't want. I wanted him to be that person that loved me but he didn't. Exasperated with him I gave him one more glare before I stormed out of the living room. I don't know how long he stood there before he left because later I came down and he was gone.

Alex went to his house that evening so I didn't see him again.

It took me a while to let go of my anger. The fact that he thought I needed to be on the pill cemented the knowledge that he thought I was dating Aiden. Well he thought I was doing a lot more than just hanging out with him.

The next day I took the bus to the specialist. Nervously I sat in the waiting room until the receptionist showed me to his office.

He was a younger than I expected. I don't know why I expected someone much older.

He smiled and tried to make me feel at ease while he went through the information the doctor had sent him. I patiently answered his questions as best as I could.

I was disappointed to find out that he wouldn't be able to tell me anything immediately. He would need to run some tests and he would need to see me in a couple of days to go over the results.

Disappointment flooded through me at the thought of two more days of agonizing waiting. It was hard to go home and keep my worry hidden from the loved ones around me. I was also a terrible actress so it was easier to just avoid everyone instead of trying to act like everything was fine.

Two days later I got a call in the morning. The specialist asked me to come in immediately to see him. That should have been the first sign that something was very wrong.

I called Jax and managed to swap my shift with someone else so I could take the day off. I got on the bus. Every possible scenario of what he would say cycled through my mind and by the time I got to his office I was a nervous wreck with the fear suffocating me from the inside.

His receptionist ushered me straight into his office. He tried to smile at me as I sat down across from him but I could see his smile didn't reach his eyes. It was the first sign.

"I've gotten the results of the tests," he informed me. I held my breath.

It was only seconds for him to reveal what was wrong with me. It took only seconds for my life to change completely.

In shock I tried to listen to everything he said but it was hard when I all I could think that what he'd told me had been the worst scenario I'd imagined and I was living it.

"Do you need me to call someone?" the doctor asked with concern.

"No...I'm okay," I lied giving him a weak smile because there was no way I was fine.

Someone. I'd kept it from everyone. He had no idea that no one knew I was here.

Afterwards I walked out of his office and stood at the bus stop. I was on autopilot as I got onto the bus and sat down. Down the road from my house I got off the bus and walked dazed to my house.

I still couldn't comprehend what the doctor had told me and I had no idea how I was going to tell anyone. For a while I just lay on my bed but when it got later I climbed out of my window and onto the roof.

I lay down and looked up to the sky that was starting to darken.

As the stars began to twinkle in the darker sky I knew I couldn't hide forever, I would have to face my family and tell them the terrible news but I just couldn't.

I needed more time so instead I lay perfectly still gazing up at the stars. I wasn't ready yet.


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Teacher: What is the difference between Biology & Sociology?


Akpos: If a new born baby looks like his father, it is Biology but if he looks like the neighbor that's Sociology!


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-04-05 11:28:31

225 Views



Motion Sickness [Read it]


Santa and Banta are discussing the possibility of love. “I thought I was in love three times,” Santa says.
“Thought…?” Banta asks. “What do you mean?”
“Three years ago, I cared very deeply for a woman who wanted nothing to do with me,” Santa says.
“Wasn’t that love?” Banta asks.
“No, that was obsession,” Santa explains. “Then two years ago, I cared very deeply for an attractive woman who didn’t understand me.”
“Wasn’t that love?” asks Banta.
“No, that was lust,” Santa replies. “And just last year, I met a woman while I was on a cruise. She was gorgeous, intelligent, a great conversationalist and had a super sense of humor. Everywhere I followed her on that ship, I would get a very strange sensation in the pit of my stomach.”
“Well, wasn’t that love,” asks Banta.
“No. That was motion sickness!” Santa replies.Related

A Wrist watch for 500k?? Will it show me when the
world will end?
• A Bathing soap for 80k?? Will it wash away sins
and sorrows?
• One Eye glasses for 350k?? If I wear it, will I be
able to see the future? • An Italian shoe for 150k?? Will I be able to walk
on water?
• A Plasma TV for 500k?? Will it show me the
Judgement day on the last day live?
• A Gold plated mobile phone for 3 million naira.
Chai!!! Will I use it to answer heaven's call? • A Hand Bag for 1.3Million naira?? Will I put my life
inside it?
• 2 million naira for a table in comedy show. Which
kind
laugh I never laugh before?
• 3 Million naira per year at a university. After graduation, will they make me the president?
Sometimes, I wonder why some people spend like
craze, knowing fully well that there are hungry
children in the streets roaming about naked.
1. The smallest act of kindness you show, can
change someone's life. 2. Remember, money only brings happiness if you
help people with it.
3. Let someone say to you, BECAUSE OF YOU I DIDN'T
GIVE UP !!!
When God blesses you financially,
don't just raise your STANDARD OF LIVING, also raise your STANDARD OF GIVING.#No Mind Me jawe #GoodDay #AoN


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-25 09:04:39

479 Views



STRIKE ALERT [Read it]


GENERAL NOTICE!!!
The boyfriends Association of nigeria (B.A.N) would be embacking on a one month strike which will begin on 1st Dec. And end on 2nd Jan. due to financial breakdown.
Our girls are therefore asked to bear with us.
Thanks for your coperation
sign: MANAGMENT


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-11-15 07:55:39

114 Views




I got to greenland hotel by 8pm
Me: aww am late
David: it's ok

David:u said u were bored
Meave i need help
David:wat kind of help?
I narrated my story to David without hiddin anything.
David:so u mean to tell me that ur husband's mistress did this to u
Me:she is my worst nightmare
David: hmm
Me:will u help me?
David:sure,my kid bro is a surgeon so i'll talk to him
Me: ok
David:let's deal with ur leg
Me:thanx alot
David:i jst hope he agrees to help
Me:pls try ur best
Cilia:i stil dey here o
David:Cilia
Ciliaahve
Davidavid not Dahve
Cilia:i don hear
Me:i think we should start going Cilia
Cilia:make i finish eat my food
Me:yes ma
**
Gerald:where have u been
Me:i went to see a friend
Gerald:wow seems someone has a friend,so wats her name
Me:u don't want to knw
Gerald:try me
Me: David
Gerald:is that her name?
Me:his name
Gerald:so ur now havin an affair
Me:jst a friend
Gerald:i see (raisin his voice)i thought u were a saint
Me:wat are u talkin about
Gerald:i've always wanted to do this

GUEST WAT HE DID?


>>

Frank: since your son is nowhere to be fine;how is your mother coping with it?
Jackson: mom is devastated;she feel pain all the time that she wake up and find out that Desmond is not here and he is not even in school
Frank: what about you?

Jackson: is frustrating you know?to have just one thing and loss it. i don't want to cry because i am a man;even if i pretend that all is well;deep down in me;i felt hurt. i haven't really being a good father to him;i couldn't for once make him happy;give him the happiness he deserve or even tell him;is this what you want then fine;do it your way. it hurt more to find out that you couldn't make up things to your son
Frank: is alright;you try your best is just that you are not a perfect father and no one is
Jackson: i know but i think i should do more better than that
Frank: you have to be strong for your entire family and how is your wife?
Jackson: she is just here;i wouldn't want to say that i am happy that just for once my wife is getting hurt and feeling something for my son but it would had been good if the boy in question come back to us
Frank: i am sure;he will
Jackson: i pray so

Blessing: grandma;i would have say i am happy that Desmond is missing
Rose: Blessing
Blessing: don't get me wrong,what i meant is that if Desmond wasn't missing grandma won't had come
Mercy: her only grandchild is Desmond
Janet: but that is not true;you all are my grandchildren and i love you all too
Blessing: but grandma;why did you love Desmond so much?
Janet: don't be ridiculous;i love you all;you all seems to think i love Desmond more because i am so close to him and i really like my son. it will never be well with those kidnappers
Mercy: but grandma;they are dead already
Janet: i know and with the person that send them
Georgina: i am not sure;he is the one that they want to kidnapped. it should be that worthless girl;that gold digger
Janet: young lady;shut up. you have such a loudmouth,if that is how you are;my son will never marry you
Rose: mother;she is just being angry that her betroth is missing with a girl
Janet: i still don't think she is suppose to call a girl like her names;do yo think the girl will be happy that she is far away from her family?
Georgina: she is happy because Desmond is the only one she need in her life and she have him. good for nothing being
Janet: quiet. don't yo know how to draw the line
Georgina: grandma;i know you are saying all those words because you are a mother. once you get to know her,you will see that she is a big from the swine

Blessing: are you crazy?my grandma is talking and you are talking also
Mercy: do you know you don't have respect?
Blessing: you with respect;why don't you teach me
Rose: will yo all keep quiet and get out of here(exit Mercy/Blessing/GEORGINA)i am sorry mother
Janet: is fine;but i don't like her and she will never marry my son
Rose: but mom...
Janet: drop it

Anita: hey
Ayo: was up
Anita: did you ever care about me?
Ayo: that question should goes to you
Anita: what do you mean by that?
Ayo: i don't want to say anything
Anita: you don't want to say anything?if you have a new girlfriend just tell me and I will gladly leave you alone
Ayo: leave if you want to
Tina: what is going on?
Anita: i should leave if i want to?i try all means to make this relationship work but you are not ready to make it work then let it go
Tina: will you two stop and talk to me

Ayo: you are such a shallow minded girl and it is so stupid of me to fall in love with you
Anita: now you know;excuse me

Tina: what is wrong with both of you?
Ayo: is frustrating sometimes;when your girlfriend is showing all the love he is suppose to show you to some fellow girl and i don't think the girl love her same way(she laughed)
Tina: both of them love each other same way;don't you know both of them are lesbians?
Ayo: what did you just say?
Tina: you heard me right;she is into girls stuff;can't you see she is trying to break up with you because those set of people don't love boys
Ayo: i can't believe it
Tina: believe it or leave it

Stephanie: where are you going to?
Joy: we are going to the market
Stephanie: can i come?
Time: no;your brother said you shouldn't go anywhere
Stephanie: what?don't mind him. please
Time: you can't;just stat at home
Stephanie: but it is unfair;he goes out and he expect me to remain in doors
Joy: fine;you can come with us but you have to be careful
Stephanie: i will
Joy: and when we say anything yo must accept it
Stephanie: deed
Time: alright;shall we

Joy: hey;the prince is coming
Stephanie: don't he have a place to stay
Tom: no;i don't have
Stephanie: i wasn't talking to you
Time: greetings prince(she bow)
Joy: greetings my prince(she bow)
Tom: rise
Stephanie: shall we go now?
Guard 1: you are crazy?will you bow?
Stephanie: what for?am i his subject?
Time: not again
Joy: we are sorry my prince;she will bow down to you. right Stephanie?
Stephanie: never(she walk away) if you girls don't want to go,i want to go (prince dragged her back)will you let go?
Tom: you know what?you will be my girl
Stephanie: in your stupid dreams
Tom: really?(he dragged her closer and kissed her)good right?
Stephanie: you are mad(she slapped him) foolish boy(his guard grab her)
Tom: will you stop it?let go of her,she is my girl
Stephanie: you wish

Joy: you such a stubborn girl
Time: told you not to come with us but you won't listen;now see
Stephanie: he is mad,is that how he behaviour?he is just a stupid being(they walked into their compound) please don't tell my brother what happen
Desmond: what happen?
Stephanie: Desmond;nothing
Desmond: Stephie;come back here
Stephanie: if i don't what will you do?(he dragged her back) stop it;don't try to kiss me again
Desmond: are you crazy?why would i want to do that?
Stephanie: sorry;i was thinking it was.......never mind

Desmond: who kissed you?
Stephanie: no one
Desmond: i said who....
Joy: the prince
Stephanie: Joy(he slapped Stephie)Jesus(he slap her again) will you stop it,you are hurting me(and he slap her the third time)
Time: stop it(Stephanie cry)
Desmond: when i asked yo to stay in doors;you will disobey me. try this rubbish again and i will kill you myself
Joy: am sorry;i did not know that your brother will hurt you
Stephanie: is alright;excuse me

Time: what an over protective brother
Joy: let him beat her;she doesn't have respect for anyone

Rod: fine girl;why are you crying?
Stephanie: my name is not fine girl and get out of here
Rod: i am sorry;i thought you are my friend and no one want to play with me









NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Biwi: Zara Kitchen se Namak lete aana….!

Bechara pati : Yahaan toh koi Namak nahi hai..!

Biwi : He bhagwan, Mere baap ko tumhare jaisa hi Soordas milna tha. Mujhe pata tha..! Tum toh ho hi Andhe..! Kaamchor ho..! Nikamme ho….! Gadhe ho…..! Ek kam dhang se nahi ker sakte..! Bas bahaane banaate ho..! Jindagi mey kuch to kam karo…! Tumhe nahin milega, Isliye pehle hi le aayi thi..!Related

WATCHING FOOTBALL WITH A WOMAN IS REALLY STRESSFUL !!
.
Wife: Honey Which teams are playing?
.
Husband: Arsenal vs Manchester United.
.
Wife : Oooh wonderful!
I Love Arsenal..
.
Husband: That's a good team...
.
Wife: Is Drogba playing?
.
Husband: He doesn't play for any of these teams...
.
Wife: Okay sweeety.
Is that Chris Brown?
.
Husband: [bored]
No he is Chamberlain...
.
Wife : Okay but they look the same...
What's that yellow card for?
.
Husband: It's a
Warning to the Player.
.
After few minutes Rooney scores for Mancheste United....
.
Wife: [celebrates in high mood]
Is that Chamberlain who has scored?
.
Husband: [calmly] No it's Rooney for Manchester United...!!
.
Wife: [furious]
How? it should be arsenal who should have scored!!
.
Husband: [silent]
.
Wife: What is that Red card for?
.
Husband : [bored]
That means the player should go out of the pitch for misbehaving.
.
Wife: Then is he going to be a Coach?
.
Husband:[unwilling to answer]
Aaaaaaaaa no...
.
Wife: Its the same with Traffic Lights:
Yellow=Warning;
Red=Danger.
.
Husband: Exactly darling...
.
Wife :What about the Green Card?
.
Husband: Mmmm nothing of that kind in a field of play....
.
Wife: I want Arsenal to win the World Cup...
.
Husband: [silent]
.
Wife: Who is that man standing who looks like
Mr. Bean?
.
Husband: [bored]
it's the Arsenal coach, Arsene Wenger.
.
Wife: that means the other opponent's coach is Manchest Wenger?
.
Husband: [CHANGES THE CHANNEL]


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-04-08 16:53:04

326 Views




This is a story about four people named,
Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and
Nobody. There was an important job to be done
and Everybody was asked to do it.
Everybody was sure Somebody would
do it. Anybody could have done it, but
Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that
because it was Everybody's job. Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up
that Everybody blamed Somebody when
actually Nobody asked Anybody.
#BOLLY_SMART™®


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-06-10 10:14:45

116 Views




Mom : Buy this local company underwear

Me : Mummy Levis ka lena hai

Mom : Kyu kise dikhana hai?

Me : Bhaiya Young India Commander ke de doRelated

Bonaza [Read it]


Bonaza!!!Bonaza!!!Bonaza!!!

hey guyz,boko haram is doing a promo.just snd ur name,phone number, house address, e.t.c to 4166 nd stand a chance 2 visit heaven or hell....




NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-12 12:53:05

255 Views




Ana spent the next two days going through the files related to Shah group's Italian business deals. She was excited to learn new stuff and increase her understanding of the Shah business empire.

She had always been on the hospitality side, and never knew that Shah group had interests in various other businesses and this was her first opportunity to learn about them. She started making notes and noted in red, wherever she felt, she didn’t have enough information or no  understanding of the topic.

She realized, why Rahul was always  so busy, he had to deal with different kinds of people all across the globe.

At the same time, she was astonished that he had enough time to trap her in a contract.

"He must have wasted lot of his valuable time on me. I don't think, I rank anywhere in his top ten priorities, then why did he pay me so much attention."

The thought made her blush and she put the file down, closed her eyes and imagined Rahul being in love with her. The last time he touched her, he made up a reason."Why did he do that?" She thought, as a strange feeling to hug something tightly enveloped her. She took one of throw pillows and laid down on the sofa, hugging it tightly, day dreaming, if there was a chance for them and how their life might look.

Two days went by and Rahul texted Ana, that he was back from London and to be ready to go on next trip with him, in the evening. He asked Ana and prince to meet him at the airport. He didn't give the destination, even when Ana asked for it.

Same day, in the evening, Ana took prince and reached the airport. She and prince entered the corporate jet, where she met air hostess Gianna.

"Excuse me Maam, may I know your name?" Gianna asked.

"Hi, I am Ana and this is my son, Prince. I am Mr Shah's personal assistant." She introduced herself.

Gianna explained the seating to Ana, then asked her, "Are you sure about the kid? As per company rules, only employees are allowed to fly, unless they belong to the Shah family."

"Yep, Mr Shah is aware of it." Ana replied, trying to stow away the luggage in the overhead bin. Meanwhile prince took off and started running around, with Gianna trying to catch him.

After evading Gianna for some time, prince finally settled himself in the biggest seat on the plane. It looked like a captain's seat, with huge video monitors, keyboards and  surrounded by telephones.

"Miss Ana, can you please control your son. He cannot run around in the plane or sit there. Mr Rahul does not like anyone occupying his seat."

"I am sorry, he is excited. Prince come here!" Ana ordered prince. She knew Gianna was trying to do her job, but it was prince's first time on a plane and he was very excited.

"Noooo, here ... I am sitting here." He declared, gripping the seat tightly.

"Prince, come here now." Ana commanded prince, making a serious face.

To be continued.

I feel am wasting my time sharing this story. Not even a single comment. You guys should encourage me by commenting. Please


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Who love me most (season 2)episode 3

It was the next day evening, amare returned back frome work and went to her room to take her bath,Amara parents was now living with her in the city, it was all maxwell idea,and the house was also bought by maxwell, it was a storey building,amara finish taking her bath, she went to the sitting room and lay in one of the couch she wasn't hungry because she has had dinner before coming home,mrs uche came out from her room to see amara laying down on the couch.

Mrs uche :are you sleeping

Amara :no mama just resting my head

Mrs uche sat down opposite amara

Mrs uche :amara

Amara :yes mama

Mrs uche :amara

Amara :yes mama am all hears

Mrs uche :how many times did i call you

Amara :twice mama

Mrs uche :what is happening

Amara was confused at the question

Amara :how

Mrs uche :what is happening between you and maxwell.

Amara :nothing

Mrs uche :i am trying to believe you but I know something is wrong

Amara :mama stop all this i know he already called you so why asking me when you already know what the problem is

Mrs uche :i want to be sure of what he told me,and if what he told me are all true then I must tell you,you should watch your step very well.

Amara :what did he tell you

Mrs uche :tell me the truth why don't you want to settle down now with maxwell

Amara annoyed)mama please i really don't want to talk about that now

Mrs uche shocked )what do you mean by that,don't you want to get married and have children and start your own family don't you want me carry my grandchildren, or do you want me to be in my grave before that happens

Amara :mama how can you say that,you know i want to get married and give you and papa grandchildren but right now is not the time,and beside am not even sure if it will be soon

Mrs uche :you better get married soon you aren't getting any younger

Amara :mama,i will but I just need a little time, i don't know but something keep telling me i shouldn't rush so I am trying to work on what I am feeling but I promise you mama i will make you and papa happy, or don't you want the best for me

Mrs uche :yes but

Amara :mama please i am asking you to be patient and in no time you will be pleased.

Mrs uche looked at amara trying to believe her,she was so in a rush to see amara get married but she just knew she have trust her daughter.

*************************
Emma now works as a manager in one of the company in port-harcourt and his now married to Sandra,he was in his office when his secretary called to inform him that he has a visitor, he asked her to let the visitors in and he drop the telephone, chidi opened the door and entered, emma got up in surprised he couldn't believe he was seeing chidi.

Emma h my God,who am I seeing

Chidi laughing )a ghost

They exchange pleasantries, emma was very happy to see chidi after a long time,he ushered chidi a sit and he sat down emma also took his sit

Chidi :look at you

Emma :don't go there, you look at yourself,you non dey add age

They were so excited to see eachother

Chidi :nice place you got here

Emma:that's the work of God,how did you fine me

Chidi :well let me say i have my ways

Emma :chidi,men it's been long, i never really expected to see you again, i thought you were gone for good,what happened ne

Chidi :well I kind of missed my town,like they say no place like home

Emma :you are right,it good to have you back,welcome to hometown

Chidi:you have really done well for yourself,i was really happy when I heard you were the manager, i was pleased

Emma :thanks,i was just made the manager last year so am trying my best,what went wrong i tryed to contact you on Facebook, Twitter and badoo but they were all blocked

Chidi :yeah I blocked them,i just needed to do so

Emma :and you didn't even bother to contact me,that one bad ooooo

Chidi :sorry men,but nothing change now i dey ne

Emma :when did you returned

Chidi :two days ago, and you were the first person that came to my mind, so how is jude and Godwin

Emma :we all lost contact when we all graduated from school, but I heard that jude is in benin and Godwin is now in south Africa i don't know what he is doing there

Chidi :you don't mean it ,i missed you guys i was hoping of see them

Emma :well that's that

Chidi :so tell me how is Sandra, do both of you till see each other

Emma laughed

Emma :i and Sandra are married with one kid and right now she is heavy with the second one

Chidi was so happy to hear that

Chidi :so you are now a family man

Emma :you can say that again, she has really been the best thing that has happened to me,i am too lucky

Chidi :you are a fulfill man now

Emma :now enough about me ,what about you what's up with you

Chidi :nothing much, really nothing

Emma :you be bad boy oooooo,it's almost lunch time,why don't we go have lunch together

Chidi :no problem

Emma got up took his car key

Chidi :why don't we just go with my car

Emma agreed in less then 2 minutes emma prepared himself and they both left, they discuss so many things on their way to have lunch and emma invited chidi to a birthday party that Sandra father was celebrating his birthday that same night and could love him to come,chidi accepted and emma gave him the address and time,after the lunch chidi drop emma off at his work place and promise to see him later at the party,it was 11pm,chidi arrived the party, there was a lot of people there most were old people, they were all looking nice on the outfit each were putting on,chidi called emma to inform him of his arrival,emma came and meant chidi standing close to the gate ,he welcome him in and gave him a chair to sit.

Emma :let me get something for you

Emma left and came back with a bottle of red wine and two glass cups,he opened it and pour into the two glass cups

Chidi :thanks

Emma :no problem

Chidi:where is Sandra

Emma :just relax let me call her

Emma let for to call Sandra, in less then some minutes emma came with Sandra, sandra is now six months pregnant and she was so happy to see chidi they both embrace,sandra asked chidi a lot of questions and chidi was ready to answer her,they were all having a great time together,

Sandra :we till have a lot of things to talk about

Chidi :no problem

Just then Sandra saw amara walking close to them,Sandra was the one to see her first because she was facing her position while chidi was sitted facing Sandra so he didn't see amara and amara wasn't aware that chidi was the one sitting close to Sandra

Sandra :who do we have here

She walked to meet Amara

Emma :amara is he

Chidi didn't bother to look back to see amara, Sandra and amara walked back to when emma and chidi was.

Emma :amara how are you

Amara :am cool

Just then amara saw chidi,she was shocked and surprise her heart was beating so fast but chidi just tryed not to look at her,Sandra notice amara.

Sandra key amara why don't we go and see my daddy,

Sandra took amara hand and they both walked away,emma sat down

Emma :chidi, don't tell me after all this years you haven't forgotten all that happened

Chidi :i have,it just that I wasn't sure what to do,

Emma :you till love her don't you

Chidi :i think so,but what does it matter she is till with maxwell and i heard they are engaged, i can't bare to see her,i really don't want to do anything stupid.

Emma :if you till feel the same for her there is no reason why you should hold it back.

Chidi :even if i didn't and i huged her and expressed how much I missed her what will it changes, will it make her come back

Emma :you can till have her back if you want to,who says people that are engaged can't break up

Chidi :what are you trying to say

Emma :go and talk to her,try to make peace with her just believe me on this one

Chidi thought for a while

Emma got up)come on,let go.

Chidi sigh and got up,they both went inside the sitting and found Sandra, emma asked her were amara was and she told them amara was at the balcony, chidi was directed to the balcony, chidi met amara there standing viewing the stars.

>>

how old are you [Read it]


My daddy was never proud of me.

One day he asked me, "How old are you?"

I said, "I am five."

He said, "When I was your age, I was six."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-09 09:48:52

258 Views



confession [Read it]


Akpos and Ochuko were drinking palm
wine together. Ochuko said,"Akpos, I have
a confession to make."Akpos asked,"What
is it?"Ochuko said,"Last week, I slept with
your wife. I am sorry."Akpos shouted,"You
slept with my wife?!" Ochuko said,"Please forgive
me."Akpos
cooled down and said,"What are friends for?
I forgive you."The following week, Ochuko
was furious that someone had harvested all
his crops in his farmland. During their
drinking time in the evening, Akpos said to
Ochuko,"Ochuko, I have a confession to
make."Ochuko asked,"What is it?"Akpos
said,"I was the one who harvested all your
crops. I am very sorry I did that."Ochuko,
after getting angry, said,"What are friends
for? I forgive you."Two weeks later, they
were drinking palm wine together when Ochuko
said to Akpos,"Akpos, I have a
confession to make."Akpos asked,"What is
it?"O
chuko said,"I poisoned your drink because I
was angry with you. Please forgive me.
Akpos said,"So you poisoned my drink? Anyway
what are friends for? I forgive
you. I also have a confession to make."
Ochuko asked,"What is it?"Akpos said,"I am
sorry! I exchanged our drinks. Please
forgive me!".


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-06 01:48:04

546 Views



funny mother [Read it]


SON: Mom, grandma is so annoying, I wish she will just die.
MOTHER: Idiot, it's your mother that will die not mine.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-04 15:23:59

560 Views




???Meanwhile at the Hyundai Showroom !!!
.
Sales man :- sir ye dekhiye Hyundai Verna

Santa :- Verna kya bhosdike ?Related

Wedding vow [Read it]


During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer.

"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to me and the part where I'm to promise to "love, honor and obey" and "forsaking all others, be faithful to her forever," I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that part out."

He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.

It is now the day of the wedding, and the bride and groom have moved to that part of the ceremony where the vows are exchanged.

When it comes time for the groom's vows, the pastor looks the young man in the eye and says, "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"

The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes."

The groom leaned toward the pastor and hissed, "I thought we had a deal."

The pastor put the $100 bill into his hand and whispered back, "She made me a much better offer."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-10-07 09:47:59

353 Views




Pappu: Dad, please make an international call to my friend from Aberystwyth, Wales.

Santa: How do you know him?

Pappu: He came to our school in student exchange.

Santa: Could you spell that please?

Pappu: If I could spell to, I’d write!Related

Sometimes sunshine turns to rain and the same ones you love bring you pain.

Good Night!Related

Walef who got f9 in enlish and maths.f9 in biology and physics but A1 in agricultural science.wanted to become a medical doctor.my advice for him is to become a harbalist doctor or what do u u think?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-15 15:59:45

349 Views



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