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good guy turn bad

Bye Bye [Read it]


One night, Akpos passed by his son's room and heard his son praying; "God, bless Mummy, Daddy, and Grandma. Bye Grandpa."

Akpos didn't quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next morning, they found Grandpa dead on the floor after a heart attack. Akpos reassured himself that it was just a coincidence, but was still a bit spooked. 

The next night, he heard his son praying again; "God bless Mummy and Daddy. Bye Grandma." 

Akpos was worried, but decided to wait until morning. Sure enough, the next morning Grandma was on the floor, dead of a heart attack. Really scared now, Akpos decided to wait outside his son's door the next night. And sure enough, the boy started to pray; "God bless Mummy. Bye Daddy." 

Now Akpos was crapping his pants. He stayed up all night, and went to see the doctor early the next day to make sure his health was fine. When he finally came home, his wife was waiting on the porch. She said, "Thank God you're here, we could really use your help! We found the Milkman dead on our porch this morning!"


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2017-04-01 10:11:17

386 Views




Akpos and his mother was inside the room one night trying to sleep but mosquitoes could not let them. Out of annoyance, Akpos stood up and was killing the mosquitoes. He killed the first one and his mother shouted "That`s my boy, 1 mosquito, 10 Naira for you". Akpos killed the 2nd mosquito and his mother shouted "2 mosquitoes, 20 Naira for you". Akpos got excited and thought of making 100 Naira he will use and buy ice cream the next day. In order to earn more, he was serious checking all the mosquito hideouts in their room. As he killed the 9th mosquito, his mother shouted "9 mosquito 90 Naira for you". He searched and searched and searched but there was no single mosquito left in the room. He went and opened the door widely for mosquitoes to enter. His mother shouted "What! Are you crazy? For that, 0 Naira for you" . Akpos is still crying and he needs your condolence


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-25 20:19:20

2998 Views



Internet [Read it]


On the Internet you can be anything you want.
It's so strange that many people choose to be stupid.


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2015-08-29 09:17:23

901 Views




In Exam Hall

Akpos tapped his friend Okon and said "Pls what is the ans to no 2 question?"
Okon: Is "Chairman"
Akpos: Ok, can you spell it for me
Okon: Its very simple, just write "Chair" then "man";
Akpos went and wrote "Chairthenman"

How many marks for Akpos


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-07-30 18:02:25

787 Views




Santa: I don’t understand the concept of “Dance Bars”.

Banta: Why?

Santa: If I would ever want a woman to take my money and sexually frustrate me, I’d better stay at home with my wife.Related

“I’m leaving now. Bye papa.” she said and found her way out of her dad’s office.

“Tricia,” David called to her retreating figure. He sighed sadly as she did not respond to his call. It was really devastating. He shook his head, he must work now, then get home to his daughter. He hoped she’d not do anything stupid to herself.

“So, lets hear your case. We have enough privacy already.”

Myles was the first to speak. “Its a kidnap case. For some reasons, it was hidden and now it has to come to light.”

“Hidden? I don’t understand you.” He turned to Allan, “Why was it hidden?”

“So many reasons,” Myles answered, regardless of the fact that he was not spoken to. “It was the best option.”

A frown creased David’s face. What sort of stupid explanation was he gonna listen to? “I’m getting impatient.”

“We have all evidence, sir. I knew about it all,” Myles answered.

“Show them to me,” David demanded.

As Myles reached out to hand the evidence to David, Allan said, “Take a deep breath, sir. What you’re about to see might shock you.”

David’s hands steadied for a shile. He shot Myles a questioning look.

“We’ve got a whole lot of explanations to do.”

“I’m listening.”
*
*
*
Purity was led into a dynamic mansion. Everything she saw reeked of wealth and power. The black gigantic gates, the inter-locked ground, streams of the latest vehicles parked chronologically, a tennis lawn, a swimming pool……. she snorted. They weren’t new to her. Her father could afford more of what stared at her. The big question still crossed her mind – what was she doing there? Was this another of Ernest’s plot? Or was it Jeremy who had done it? He actually had her at heart? She couldn’t help but wonder, Jeremy was stinkingly rich and so was Ernest. The more she pondered over it, the more perplexed she became. She heaved a weary sigh. Following their orders could provide the answers she needed. They were even too strong for her – the men. She resigned to doing so.

As the door to the mansion opened, she was greeted by five young maids, in their uniforms, ready to recieve her. They took her from the bloody looking men, leading her to a room. She got confused. Where to now? She didn’t give protesting a single thought, it wouldn’t save her.
*
*
*
Jeremy exhaled, looking out the window. Silence filled the moving vehicle. The silence was only broken when Ernest gave further directions to the place Purity was taken and after that, they relapsed to silence. He was glad it was thay way. Hearing Ernest speak to him was repulsive. It only ignited the feeling of anger and hatred he felt for him. Keeping his damn mouth shut was good for them. Something else was of importance to him. He needed to get to her, to see her. He wished she was okay and that it wouldn’t be impossible to help her out by the time they find her.
“I wanna call Allan,” he said to Darren. “I need to know the situation over there.”

“Go on,” Darren replied absent minded. His thoughts were far away. He hoped they wouldn’t fail, he wouldn’t fail his friends.

“Allan,” Jeremy breathed out when the phone was answered. “What’s up?”

“Its not that easy,” Allan drawled in a disappointed tone.

That response made Jeremy’s heart lurch, “What’s happening? It should be easy.”

“It happens that the cop to help us out turns out to be Tricia’s dad. We’re tryna convince the old man to be on our side.”

Jeremy sighed, “That’s one hell of a job.”

“We’re working on it. Will get back to you when we’re ready.”
*
*
*
“What do you want with me? Why bring me here? Who are you all?” Purity asked the maids when they were finally locked up in a room – a very beautiful one at that. But her mind wasn’t settled. She had to know.

None of them agreed to speak up. They just looked at her and exhcanged glances among themselves. It looked as if they communicated with their eyes, reading eachother’s minds. And they tried reading hers. They had no idea if they were to carry out their duty or not.

“Please,” Purity insisted. “I don”t know what I’m doing here. Make me feel comfortable.”

A sigh came from one of the maid, probably the oldest. “We just want to dress you up. The boss gave us that order.”

“Who is your boss?” she questioned, her hope lighting up, “Who wants me dressed up?”

“Please, ma’am. We don’t want to get to trouble. Let’s do our jobs.”

Purity frowned. Who is the boss? Could it be Jeremy? Musing wouldn’t get her anywhere.

Tricia lay lazily in the bathtub. Her body covered with soapy water and her left hand hand out, dripping slowly with water. She closed her eyes, thinking deeply. The soapy water kept dripping off her hand at intervals making a soft noise as it touched the tiled floor.

The bathroom remained still except for the little drops of water that decreased each time one fell off. She laid still, motionless. Silence. Silence. Beats of silence.

“Nooo!!!” she shrieked suddenly, lifting herself off the tub. She placed both hands on her ears frantically. “It can’t be,” she whispered to the air. “It just can’t be,” she cried out again.

With quivering hands, she covered her nudity; wrapping a white cotton towel around her body. “They won’t let me be,” she muttered, stepping out of the bathtub, “Please, go away,” she sobbed.

And they wouldn’t just listen. They just continued speaking at the same time. Tricia felt her head was gonna split into two. She really couldn’t take it anymore. She covered her ears with her hands a second time and found her way out of the bathroom. On getting to her bedroom, she sank into her bed, weeping. “I’ve got to be her. If I’m not her, they’d never leave me.” More determined, she repeated, “I’ve got to be her. Tricia Cayson no more exists. I am Purity Theodore.”
*
*
*
“Give me a name,” Purity persisted. She was sure it’d get a good result. Without anymore whinnings and protests, she wholeheartedly submitted herself to the maids. They had done whatever they wanted, and she smiled at the perfect reflection of herself in the mirror. She never believed she’d be as pretty as she was after all that Ernest put her through. She exhaled, “I’m really curious to know,” she flashed the maid who had earlier answered her questions a broad smile, “Please…..”

The maid was between crossroads. A part of her wanted to jump right at the miss’s offer and tell her all she wanted to hear. The other part declined, and for good reasons. She had to keep her job and talking would do no good, it might cost her her job. Then, she’d be out on the streets with her son – begging. It was something she never wanted to happen. She closed her eyes, inhaled and exhaled sharply as she weighed the outcomes of her intended actions in her head. “Miss,” she called out softly, opening her eyes, “I can’t do it. As much as I want to, I can’t. Please, don’t ask any further questions.”

A frown curled Purity’s lips. She thought of a better idea. “Um, why don’t you give me the letter his name starts with. Trust me, if you were in my shoes, you’d be dying to know as much as I am.”

She felt sorry for her. She knew that feeling too – being kept in the dark while everyone else was aware. Its unbearable. This wouldn’t hurt, right? “Its a J.”

Purity grinned. “A J.” she repeated. “Its a J,” she said again. She felt her stomach flutter. “A J.” It was Jeremy. He was actually the one behind the facade, just to show how much he loved her. She felt loved. “Um, does he by any chance have a Y in his name?”

“Uh…..yes, he does.”

That’s it! Her guess wasn’t hazarded. It was a good guess. Jeremy, Jeremy. Oh, how she had missed him. She was finally gonna see him and determinded to love him back. Nothing was going to deny her of being happy, especially with him. She wasn’t scared anymore, she was more than willing to love him and have him as hers.

“Miss, its time. He awaits your presence,” the maid informed, breaking into her reverie.

Purity smiled dreamily. Excited she was. She couldn’t wait to lay her eyes on him. The only man who had succeeded in breaking the walls around her heart. Staring at the mirror, she said, “Lets do some finishing touch.”
*
*
*
“Two turns at your left,” Ernest directed. He was going to help get Melisa back. He was sure of it. Good thing he realized his mistakes, but it was a little late. Despite that, he was determined to be a good guy and love enough to let go, just like Jeremy.

Darren felt the piercing silence eating him up. He decided to take advantage of it. “Ernest,” he called out, exhaling. “Are you sure you’re taking us to the right place? If this happens to be a set up, I’d personally put a bullet to your skull,” he threatened.

“Its the right place.” He thought for a while, “I’m not wrong. If we don’t get to find her, they might have moved.” He looked scared. They shouldn’t move, he prayed. “I swear it-”

“Don’t you fucking swear!” Jeremy exclaimed, irritated. “Do not swear in my presence,” he warned.

“Relax brother, he’s tryna convince -”

“I think we’re here,” Ernest cut him off.


>>

Beans [Read it]


A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. 


"My father grows beans," said one girl. 


"My mother cooks beans," said a boy. 


Akpos spoke up, "We are all human beans."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-07 08:58:46

190 Views




Santa was asked to explain ‘RAPE’.

He said, “It is a very very difficult job”. It is something like playing Golf with a moving hole.”Related

Now Reading Daily Gist >> Jokes >> Akpos The Wise Fool
Akpos The Wise Fool
September 6, 2014 by Henry 2 Comments


0
0
4


Girl: I’m warning you, my Mummy is coming back
soon..
AKPOS: But I’m not doing anything..
Girl: That’s why I’m warning you.
================






Hurry up CASHIER: This is the 5th movie ticket you’ve
bought tonight Sir, Why?..
AKPOS: Yes, that Idiot at the entrance keeps tearing it.
================
TEACHER: What’s your favorite flower?..
AKPOS: Chrysanthemum..
TEACHER: Spell it..
AKPOS: I was joking o. My favorite flower is Rose R-O-S-E
========


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2015-05-31 13:48:14

358 Views




A wife and husband are having money issues. One day they decide that the wife should go for Ashawo work for just that day. Later that night the husband goes to pick the
wife up. He asks, "How much did you make, sweetie?" She answers, "I made N20000.50K." The husband says, Gush!! "What asshole gave you 50 Kobo?" She
replies, "All of them." The man fainted.

HAHAHAHA



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-27 15:06:29

4099 Views




There is this girl I love so much but I still don't know why she won't talk to me anymore. It started like this:


She posted on Facebook: "All men are dogs!" 


I commented: "Which breed is your father?"


That's how the problem started.


Please did I ask the wrong question?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-12-05 07:26:30

127 Views



lawyer [Read it]


A married lawyer made love wit his girlfriend inside his car one day- the girl enjoyed it so much that she forget her panty.on getting home,his wife saw the girl's panty in d car.she got mad and tore it into pieces screaming. honey! honey!! honey!!! what's this? the lawyer calmly replied. my god you've just destroyed evidence of a rape case worth millions of pounds. she quickly fell on her knees apologizing.honey please forgive me,god will bring another one!......................



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2016-09-06 07:50:38

264 Views




a notorious robber was caught nd sentenced 2 death by electrocution.d dpo opted 2 execute him personally in d AIR CONDITIONED execution rum.as he was about 2 start d electrocution,he observed dat d place was heated up.he asked a junior officer 2 turn on d A.C.d officer did so bt d dpo died. Why? D Officer Turned On D Alternating Current Used 2 Electrocut


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2016-02-21 14:13:48

665 Views




DAD: Akpos, if Mr John asks after me, tell him I'm not around. How will you tell him when he comes, cos i know you are funny?

AKPOS: When he comes, I will say my daddy said I should tell you he is not around.

DAD: ! Just tell him, he is not around. Ok!?

AKPOS: Yes daddy.
[When Mr John arrived...]

MR JOHN: Akpos, where is ur daddy?

AKPOS: He is not around.

MR JOHN: When is he coming back?

AKPOS: Wait let me go and ask him he didn't tell me.
(Rushed into the room, shouting, daddy, daddy, when are u coming back?)


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-04-13 08:02:27

478 Views



Monkey_Boy [Read it]


Half way through the semester, he squanders his money foolishly. He calls his father at home. &ldquoad,” he says, “You won’t believe what modern education is developing into! They actually have a program here in school that will teach our dog, monkey-boy, how to talk!”


“That’s amazing,” his Dad says. “How do I get Monkey-boy into the program?”


Akpos smiling said, “Just send him down here with N10,000. “I’ll get him into the course dad.”


So, his father sends the dog and N10,000. About two weeks to the end the semester, the money again runs out. Akpos calls home again.


“So how’s Monkey-boy doing son?” his father asks.


“Awesome, Dad, he’s talking up a storm,” he says, “but you just won’t believe this, they’ve had such good results they have started to teach the animals how to read!”


“Read!?” says his father, “No kidding! I’ll love for monkey-boy to read!”


Akpos smiling said, “That will be no problem dad. Just send N20,000, I’ll get him into the class.”


The money promptly arrives. But Akpos then had a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk nor read.


So he killed the dog. When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited.


“Where’s monkey-boy? I just can’t wait to see him read something and talk!”


&ldquoad,” Akpos says, “I have bad news. Yesterday morning, just before we wanted to drive home, monkey-boy was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading a Newspaper, like he usually does. Then he turned to me and asked, “So, is your daddy still sleeping around with that woman who lives in town?”


The father exclaimed, “I hope you killed that son of a b***h before he talks to your Mother!”


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-21 13:10:16

388 Views



aaaabeeg [Read it]


there was a very troublesome boy called Bj.he was feared a lot.One day,he misbehaved a little bit 2 much and some soldiers dealt with him n d following conversation began
Bj:Abeg,waiting I do ona,(crying shamelessly). na waka I just dey oo.aaaah.shay na sence ona say I no get.I done get am na,abeg.
Soldiers:wat of d girl wey we c u dey rape na
Bj:me,rape girl?,as as how na?na play we dey oo


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-10-27 11:06:34

168 Views




CHEMISTRY and his brother, PHYSICS
with deep
sorrow announce the death of their
father,
MATHEMATICS who died in a serious
calculation on blackboard road of chalk
avenue.....
AGRICULTURE has promised to provide
land for
the burial and FINE ART will design
and decorate the coffin ,,,ENTREPRENEURSHIP and
his
wife
COMMERCE have pledged to provide
food and
transport for the mourners while C.R.K
and I.R.S will pray for the soul of the late
MATHEMATICS
,,,,then HISTORY and her friend
GEOGRAPHY will
narrate the life story of the late
MATHEMATICS to the mourners while ENGLISH will
be
the master of
ceremony and BIOLOGY will tell the
mourners the
disease that killed the late, i must sue
his dead body for the money he borrowed
from me ,,,,,
PLEASE WHO MADE THIS LAST
STATEMENT


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-02-05 22:48:48

821 Views




You can always tell a real friend: when you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job.

~ Laurence J. PeterRelated

comfortable [Read it]


Akpos was passing by d street one day and saw one of his friend celebrating birthday,he branch with his hunger 4kin face and sat,expectin food,not 2 long his friend saw him and said Akpos,have you been searved ?,hope you are comfortable?
¤Akpos answered and said bro,(I NO COME FOR TABLE o,I COME FOR SHOP)


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-02 14:30:07

745 Views




A doctor wrote on his new clinic: Any treatment is GHc300 and if we cannot treat, we will pay you GHc500.
Wanting the GHC500 for himself, intelligent Akpos came to the doc and said: I can’t feel any taste.
The doc asked a nurse to give Akpos a few drops of medicine from box 22.
Upon taking the drops, Akpos shouted “Oh STOP! it is urine!”
The doctor said “congratulations, your sense of taste is back now”.
Akpos was very angry that he lost GHc 300.

He came back two weeks later determined to get GHC 500.

The following conversation ensued between Akpos and the doc:

Akpos : I lost my memory.
Doctor: Nurse! Please give this man some drops of medicine from box 22.
Akpos: Wait doctor but that medicine is for sense of taste.
Doctor: Congratulations, your memory is back.



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-04 08:50:54

261 Views




MY FIRST PREGNANCY EPISODE 2


Mr Sammy quickly carried her without wasting time, he walked out of his room with Mrs faith in his hands,the mass of his wife was on the high side,(mr sammy):"jess my wife is kinda massive in the weight region,i never knew she would be this big:,he said to himself.He move out of the room, then he got to the stairs,his mind started playing tricks on him,it told him that he would fall with mrs faith to the floor.but he ignored it,he scaled through the stairs without tripping down with his wife,they both got to the parlour and Mrs faith was still in serious pain,he dropped her on the on the chair, and he went to check whether his car key was still placed where he left it in the afternoon,Mrs faith tried to hold herself together,Mr Sammy saw his car key which was on the tv stands,he quickly picked it up,then he headed out carrying Mrs faith,he placed Mrs faith foot on the floor at the booth side of his car, so that she could stand up right, and so he could open his car back seat door.as mr sammy opened his car,Mrs faith shouted because she felt a heavy movement within her,it was so loud that their neighbours around switch on their light,he ran back to her and held her by the waist then he used his right hand to hold her left hand,he walked her into the back seat of his car,then he quickly closed the back seat as her laid down at the back seat.after that he rushed and open the large gate of his mansion........TO BE CONTINUED......STORY BY DINDY.....WHATSAPP NUMBER:07087750433....FACEBOOK NAME:OSSY NNAMDI
PLEASE DO NOT SHARE WITHOUT TELLING ME




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A man from canada heard that nigerians always use question to answer question. he decide to know if it is true or false. he took a flight from canada to lagos export. as he step out of the plane, he met akpos and ask him:


canada man: hello sir,

akpos: what do you
want?

canada man: sir, is it true that people in this country use question to answer question?

akpos: who told you?

The man took another flight to canada.
one word for akpos
#B-goF.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-01-09 17:03:50

632 Views




One lady delivered twins, surprisingly one is boy & other is dog… How is it possible?

Her hubby is a hutch user… Wherever he goes his Network follows.Related

girls wahala [Read it]


GIRLS ARE WICKED OOO
I have been sending chat msgs to
this gal as in “hi”, “hey”, “xup” …since
2009
but she has neva replied me! Today i
sent, “232252536421162” to her and after
3secs she replied “xup handsome, pls
which network airtime is dis?”
And i replied, “its a NOKIA
torch light serial number” ….
she got angry and she blocked me immediately.
Pls did I say anything bad??


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2015-06-05 22:15:24

562 Views




Passion is a sort of fever in the mind, which ever leaves us weaker than it found us.

-William PennRelated

Khadija narrates

I returned to where the family were waiting and could feel the joyous mood in the air. The angels were nowhere to be found. Mr. Akande and Ele ran to meet me but to my utmost dismay, they both were asking after Lia which made me happy I did the right thing. They stop abruptly when they saw me holding a small cloth with blood all over and gave me questioning looks. They both turned back to look at Aarti.

“I thought you told us Queency was with Dija...” Ele quizzed Queency.

“Yes, she…” Aarti was about blackmailing me but I shut her instantly with wailings which got everyone confused.

“What is the matter Dija” Ele asked anxiously.

“Speak up my daughter, please speak up” Mr. Akande urged me.

“I tol…d her not to tell y..ou” I started pointing at Aarti who was getting confused about the whole situation.

“That?” everyone asked simultaneously except Aarti who put on a scared look.

“Queency might be dead”, I revealed shocking everyone as I threw the bloody piece of cloth forward.

“She might have been attacked by a wild animal or killed by the human part merchants, I told Aarti ill break the news myself that’s why she didn’t tell you”, I concluded my falsified revelation supported by deluded wailing.

As soon as I finished my false revelation, Ele who had bought my lie rushed aggressively at Aarti and landed her two resounding slaps as she tripped to the ground.

“What were you doing when my Queency was being killed and why did you return back unscathed?” he said as he attempted to rain blows on Aarti but Manual stopped him.

“You are a man, so act like one and learn to control your emotions” Manual cautioned Ele whose eyes was already red with anger as he attempted to land a blow on Manual but a strong defense from Manual pushed Ele back. Ele would not give up and like someone possessed by an evil spirit, he ran towards Manual holding a stick but a bicycle kick from Manual sent Ele flying on the air as he landed on a tree and fainted.

Mr. Ledan who was silently witnessing the whole scene attacked manual and injured him by dislocating some bones.

“Don’t you ever try to lay your filthy hands on my son again” he warned Manual who fixed his bones back and ordered his men who by now were ready to attack Ledan to back off.

Ledan and manual joined hands to revive Ele who became conscious again after few trials. I never knew Ele’s dad was that skilled in martial arts but I was happier about the confusion I created. The whole thing had gone easier than I planned. Aarti was the only problem I had to eliminate and I had to do that as soon as possible.

Mr. Akande who had been sitting down on the floor looking into space with mouth wide open suddenly got up and started saying “No... no… no… no… my daughter cannot be dead, my Lia canot be dead”.

“You have not seen her dead body right?” He came to me holding my shoulders shaking me with his eyes wide open like someone who has taken opium.

“But sir, you saw the cloth and…” I was trying to explain.

“YOU DIDN’T SEE HER DEAD BODY RIGHT?” he asked this time in a thunderous voice that echoed throughout the forest as we all got scared and I began to pray he never finds out or I was so dead.

He finally let go of me and began running to nowhere in particular saying “I must at least see her dead body”. Mr. Ledan and some of Manual guys ran after him and caught up with him. He wanted to resist them but Ele’s dad hit a wood on his head and rendered him unconscious.

“Let’s get out of this god-forsaken place”, Ele’s dad ordered as we picked our bags and headed for where our jet was. I sure have a lot of questions to answer from my dad.

As we were about heading out, Ele gave Aarti a stern look, Aarti gave me a questioning look, while Ele’s dad gave manual a warning look. We sure have a long way to go when we arrive home but of utmost important is Aarti’s disappearance from planet earth. Anyone who messes with me , messes with death. Aarti might not be a threat now but she may be a future problem and I don’t take chances that’s why they call me dija d devil diva.

“Dija, why are you thinking about, don’t stay that far behind so we wouldn’t leave you behind” Ele’s dad said.

I was actually carried away with my evil thought and forgot the situation I was in.

“Alright sir!” I said trying hard not to smile as we moved on.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
++++++++++++++++++++++++

A woman was busy looking for firewood for evening food when her four years son who was walking with her suddenly started crying.

Woman: what is it Somto?

Son: *no response* still wailing

Woman: Nna don’t worry ehnn, food would be ready soon.

Son: still crying and pointing towards a particular direction
The woman looked towards the direction her son was pointing and noticed something. She held her son tight and went to check out what was amiss and lo and behold was a beautiful maiden who seem to have been bath with blood.
Woman: Chineke… no wonder my Somto was crying.

What was she to do now? She might be accused of murder if someone sees her in this position. She turned to leave as quickly as possible when she heard a sound. She turned back and saw the maiden moved a hand and was trying to say something. The woman went closer, bent down and tried to listen to what the near lifeless maiden had to say.

Maiden: H..e.l…p m..e , he..l..p m…e
.
.
.
Next episode comes up tomorrow..


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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What do you call a man who loses 150 lbs of useless fat?

A divorcee!Related

Today’s gon’ be great! Well i hope it does. Wait
i don’t understand, what is she to me? Are we
friends already?? Where is this heading to
Hhmmm…
I was so excited that moment, why i was so
excited? I’m gon’ drive a Range Rover Sport
baaby!
I rushed out immediately to test it… i got there,
checked under the tire and got the keys, entered
the car then start it. Its been a while since i
drive so… i should be careful. I moved the car
believe me it was awesome! what ah ride!!
Wait… Am i going for a date or what?
I got back in, no need for me to prepare
anything to eat, i’d just have a yoghurt. Exam is
around the corner, i need to go home and get
more money ‘coz i guess i’d spend alot today.
*Phone rings* | *Caller Lola*
Me: Hi Lola
Lola: Victor, whats up with u?
Me: I’m fine
Lola: No, not that. Why Haven’t we heard from
u?
Me: Oh… i’ve been busy really
Lola: Is that so?
Me: Yea
Lola: U know… why don’t u come around so
we’d hangout
Me: Ermmm…
Lola: What?
Me: I’m kinda going out to see a friend
Lola: By that, u mean Mirabel?
Me: What are U talking about?
Lola: Never mind, its nothing…
Me: But u were tr…
Lola: (Interrupted) Gat to go, see ya
Me: Lola wait…
*Hangs up*
Ok now i’m totally confused, Whats going on?
How the hell did she know?? I hope I hope its…
well we’ll see.
I took my bath, did the necessaries and got
myself ready wearing one of my nicest clothe. I
looked myself in the mirror, dam?! I look good
also smelling nice while its not even a date or
like going out with my girlfriend hmmm…
I took a bottle of yoghurt, got out, locked my
door then went to the side of the car, no one
was there to give me some shots so i took some
selfies. I ignited the car, off i left for the bank to
withdraw some money before going to Mirabel’s
place.
On the road listening to some cool vibes, smooth
driving chai! Big boy kowai!
I got to the gate of their building and called
Mirabel, after a few minutes the gate open. Who
opened it? Her two bodyguards of course. I
guess i forgot their names already. I saw how
the male one was looking at me, not a good way
though it was like when an enemy is looking at
his opponent. I no send ‘am jare, no be just
guard him be? See me driving rangey abegi!
They directed me to Mirabel’s place, omoh… no
wonder its first class. The surrounding was
awesome, well maintained, clean, gardens, the
swimming pool was awesome. Can’t mention
everything jare… the lady guard ushered me in
while the male one was behind me looking like
something i dont know infact i don’t like him.
The lady guard told me that Mirabel is inside,
that she’d be with me shortly. She told me to
seat but didn’t, i chose to look around her
beautiful home. Who is her father or mother by
way that got her all these as a student. Looking
at the pictures on the wall, there i saw a portrait
of our newly elected President and its not even
his official picture. I saw a portrait which seems
to be her family picture, i was about to go
closer to get a proper view before she called me
from behind.
Mirabel: Victor…?
I slowly turned around and saw her the way i’ve
never done before. Mehn… she looked beautiful,
she stuns in the dress she wore. I didn’t know
when my mouth open and said something
unintentionally…
Me: U look gorgeous
Mirabel: Thanks dear
But i’m glad i did…
Me: U got a nice place here
Mirabel: Thanks
Me: So ermmm… Are u ready?
Mirabel: Yea, U’re right on time
Me: Hhmm… shall we?
Mirabel: *Smiles*Sure
She told her bodyguards to stay back but the
male one tried to object. She shouted at him
which shut his mouth. I really dunno whats
wrong with that guy, when i burst him face eh…
he go know.
We got to the car, i opened the door for her, she
thanked me.
Mirabel: So… where are u taking me to?
Me: Where would u like?
Mirabel: Remember u are the one that’s taking
me out
Me: Yea
Mirabel: Then take me out
Me: Hhmm… Yes ma
We gisted a lot before getting to our destination,
like the car being borrowed to be returned
tomorrow or next. I got out from the car and
she is still in. I just laughed and shake my head
before opening the door for her. On stepping
down, she smiled while thanking me.
We got into the place i took her, it was a nice
place which i’ve never been before. I only saw it
while passing by and wish to there someday.
Well… today is the day, Thank God.
I drew the chair for her to seat, i guess i’ve
watched too many romantic movies to be acting
this romantic.
An attendant came over to us and handed us
the menu to select.
She ordered fried rice and chicken with red wine.
I love fried rice, so i ordered same.
We were served the meal, we started eating and
talking at the same time. One talk led to another
then we arrived at this….
Mirabel: I actually know what happened that day
between U, Lola and Cynthia.
Me: I dunno what u’re talking about
Mirabel: U don’t need to pretend, they told me
everything. The food, their sexy acts to seduce u,
your gentle and coolness, the call?
Me: What?
Mirabel: And I’m 100% sure that the call was
fake. U made that up just to run away from
them…
Me: So they are your friends?
Mirabel: My best friends
Me: I dunno what to say
Mirabel: U don’t have to say anything, actually i
want to confess
Me: What?
Mirabel: I just hope u wont get mad if i should
tell u this
Me: Well i will if u don’t tell me
Mirabel: Ok, i actually… ermmm… i’m the brain
behind all what happen between U and the girls
Me: Huh?
Mirabel: I sent them to u the first time u met
them to get your number and address.
Everything that follows was planned and I’m
really sorry
Me: But why did u do that?
Mirabel: Because… i found myself liking u
already. I tested you with my friends to know
how gentle you are ‘coz i don’t want to be with
a bad guy and go through another heartbreak…
please understand me Victor
Me: Woah… just wow! I never saw this coming
Mirabel: I know its hard to believe but its true
and as it is right now… i trust u.
Me: I’m sooo lost of words right now like
seriously
Mirabel: I’m in love with you Victor…
*My eyes opened wide*
?????
We alighted from the car in front of her
apartment, i walked her to the door then i held
her hand which she faced me eyes to eyes. She
then put her both hands round my neck while i
placed my hands on her waist… our heads drew
nearer, our eyes closed, slowly our lips locate
the other..…………

To Be Continued....

>> Part 14 -

EPISODE 16

Everywhere looked strange.
She couldn’t quite describe it. The closest
definition of it was hell.
The deep pit filled with aggressive yellow
flames.
The scorched features around.
The thick cloud of dark smoke enveloping
the air.
It sure was hell.
But she wasn’t in it yet. She was sure. She
couldn’t
feel the burning yet.
Inside the round fiery pit, red hot flames
soared
and roared, sending out hot crumbs of fire.
She dodged the scalding crumbs and finally
saw
clearly where she was: on top of the narrow
fence
that surrounded the pit of fire.
Just one careless step and she is crashing
down
into the sea of flames.
She was terrified. She spread her hands
wide apart
to maintain balance. The fence seemed to
get
thinner with each passing second.
Then finally she saw them. The two women
that
were her nightmare. One on her right and
the
other on her left.
She couldn’t quite place their faces but she
was
aware of the marked difference in body size:
one
was shorter and fatter and the other
slimmer and
taller.
They were close now, their faces darkened
with
evil determination.
She cried out, begging them to spare her as
they
inched closer and closer.
But she knew they wouldn’t listen even if
she cried
out blood.
They grabbed her, each by one hand.
With masterly control they swung her back
and
sent her flying down the pit.
Mma awoke with a start, huffing and
puffing.
The AC was on but beads of sweat crowded
her
forehead.
A rough bang came on the door, startling
her.
When she opened the door and saw Cynthia
and
the fury in her eyes, Stella standing beside
her
with face twisted in a frown of disgust, she
confirmed who her tormentors in the dream
had
been.

>>

mcaas [Read it]


Woman hears someone knock at the door. She
opened the door and it was a calm looking young
man who just asked her “Do you have a private
part?” She slams the door in disgust.
The next day she hears a knock, opens up and it
was the same man. He asked the same question
and the woman slams the door again. This
continued for the next 3 days before the woman
decided to tell her husband what has been
happening. The husband said to her, “Honey I’m
taking tomorrow off to be home just in case he
shows up again.” The next morning they hear a
knock at the door and the husband said, “I’m going
to hide behind the door and listen. If it is the same
man, I want you to answer him “Yes” to see where
he is going with this.”
The man asked the same question, “Do you have a
private part?” “Yes!” replied the woman. The man
then replied, “Good! Would you mind telling your
husband to leave my wife’s private part alone and
start using yours?” The fight is still on as I was
writing this…


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2017-03-28 21:27:17

253 Views



Future tense [Read it]


Teacher: "I killed a person, tell me this sentence in future tense."
Akpos: "In future tense, You will go to jail."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-07 08:32:29

680 Views




You'll never be brave if you
don't get hurt.
You'll never learn
if you don't make mistakes.
You'll never be successful if you
don't encounter failure. The best thing that you can do in
life is to follow your heart.
Take riks.
Don't just take the safe
and easy route because you're
afraid of what might happen. Don't have any regrets and know
that everything happens for a
reason.
The greater danger for
most of us lies not in setting our
aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low,
and achieving our mark.


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Ade in school [Read it]


Teacher:If we have 5 cattles on the farm and two of them ran home how many we be left.
Ade:Zero
Teachero you get the question well?
Ade:Yes,the answer is zero.
Now the head master came in and the teacher explains to him...
H.m:Ade,if two out of five cattles ran home,how many we be left on the farm?
Ade:Zero Na!!
H.m:How?
Ade:If two cattles ran home the others go follow them....do you understand?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2017-03-20 09:02:24

521 Views




Good Morning!!!

Did you know the key to success is to do what you love most.

Have been neglected by so many people, but picked up by some other people "What does that mean" #Smile# "dat means if one does not appreciate your effort, some others will" Never Loose Hope. There is a word I believe in, which is #FAITH#, I ain't rich but far from poverty, I believe in one tin, which is #BE WHAT YOU ARE#, God has given evri1 in dis life 1 or 2 Talent, do not imitate others (positive aspect), because that same person you want to imitate might be looking up to you as a role model.

Stay Blessed, and have a Peaceful day ahead


Happy Sunday!!!


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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When you do what you fear most, then you can do anything.

~ Stephen RichardsRelated

Steve Jobs’ last words:

Dear Punjabis,

Please note that

.

..

iPill is not our product

and

iPad is not a sanitary napkin!Related

U badbelle people should learn a lesson, wat is
hapening to chelsea right now. Dats d way
of life. Sumtimes u wil experience bad times,
smtimes harsh times, sumtimes toughest
times. But if u hv d seal to overcum u wil.
Just keep doing ur best, dnt quit until u make ur last attempt,also dnt make ur last
attempt until u succed. We d chelsea fans
we dnt accept defeat becos we are stil d
champions of england. Up blues. I remain Chelsea fan
til d devil become pastor/til kero&petrol become 15naira per liter. Til aeroplane get plane_stop for air&dem go dey huck gala&pure water 4der... #CfC #AoN


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-04 12:01:35

746 Views




Dastan Soon Lo Jara Ghame Zindgi,

Bewafa Ho Tum Na krenge Tumse Dilagi,



Gairon Ki Baahon Main Machlati Ho Tum,

Behad Mehesoos Hoti Hai Hame ShermindagiRelated


....continue part....

I was in my room on Saturday evening at about
6: pm when I phone starts to ring ,i check the
calling it was osaretin, i pick up the call,
"where u dey" he asked me,"i dey house any problem,"
i said,he told me to come to meet him at SOD,after
that he ended the call,i wonder what will be the
problem from the sound of his voice all was not
well,i got up immediately and headed to the SOD,
i know most of you will be wondering what is SOD,
well to other it mean different things but to us
it something else SOD means SECTION OF DILIGENCE.
SOD is an uncompleted building own by osazee
father,the building has been abandoned for
many years reasons i don't know,we made it out
secret place where we hang out to do dirty things,
we even f**k girls there most times, that was the
place where osaretin,osazee and osayewenre do smoke,
i only join then in drinking, if not for my liver
problem i might not be left out,that i will discuss
later,you already know who found the name,and i
till don't know why osaretin could call sure a
deadly and corrupted place diligence,it wasn't a
problem for me leaving the house because no one
was as home,i got outside and took a bike and
headed to ugbo,if you live in benin you will
know where am talking about,in not less then
fifteen minutes i got to the place,
i had to walk because the building was located
in a deep bush, only cars that have building
there can drive in maybe to inspect their
building or to do other dangerous things.there
were not lot of building there that's why it's
very dangerous to walk there at night,i got there
after some minutes of walking and i went inside,
i meet osaretin, osazee and osayewenre sitted
on the block which they use as a sit,they were
busy smoking and drinking,we all gave ourselves
a pleasant hand shake, "dis one une call me come
here waytin happen" i asked them,they all kept
quiet concentrating on what they are doing,
osaretin point at a little room by our left,
signaling me to go ahead and have a look,i went
there and had the greatest surprise of my life,
i saw lmade, i was snub, i wouldn't move or say
anything, how did they bring her here was the
question that was going through my mind i
wouldn't just believe my eyes,was i dreaming,
lmade kneel down immediately she saw me,her
eyes was red,she has definitely been crying,
"please uyi,please let me go,am sorry for
anything i have done wrong please don't hurt me
i beg you" she keep on begging and crying at the
same time,i was touched by her tears,i left her
and went back to make my friends "what is the
meaning of this rubbish that is going on here" my
words was harsh but my voice was low,i wouldn't
want to offend any one of them,i tryed to use my
words rightly any mistakes from me would worsening
the case of lmade,"what is the meaning of what you
just said,you asked for revenge and now you have
it,what you should be doing is to thanks us and go
in there to do your work" osaretin said calmly
"guys this one non be waytin i want,yes I wan
punish her but that one ne before i don forget
am,abeg make une let her go " i tryed pleasing
with them,osayewenre stood up with anger it like
my words offended him, "u dey mad,abi u high,u kw
d kind stress way we pass through take bring her here,
now you come dey fone good boy,guy non talk am again
oooo", his voice was high, "Ne you ask for revenge
now you don get am,waytin con be ur problem now "
osazee said,i tryed to pleased with them but to
no avail,"guy you get two choices nd u go make
am fast fast,you go enter there fuck maddest comot
for her body or you go let us help you" osaretin
said to me looking straight into my eyes,i know they
were waiting for my answer and what ever i say
determine the fate lmade will go through,three
against one d**k, i so wanted to help her out but
it seems there was no way out,i couldn't allow them
have their turn on her so I have to take the
decision i thought was best,i agreed to do it
which mean to rape her,it wouldn't be difficult
this time because I had my friends with me,osaretin,
osazee and osayewenre stood up and we all went to
the room lmade was,she went on her knees again and
soon as she saw us,i could see the fear in her eyes
and i so much pity her but it was something I need to
do to help her some how,she started pleasing again
"u dey beg abi,so u sabi beg,wen u almost kill our
friend becuz of that your small t*t* way u dey hide"
osaretin said "non mind am" osayewenre said too,"you
go hear oba today,uyi oya carry on " osaretin called
me,her pleading suddenly increase, i want to where she
was kneel down with her, "i really don't want to froce
you so please just let me do it the easy way,"i tried
to sound more gentle but it was like my words add
petrol to fire,she increased her pleading and started
shouting for help that when when osaretin gave her a
slap the sent her on the floor, she didn't need someone
to tell her to keep quiet the slap did the job,i tryed
to come up on her but she push me away,that was when
osaretin, osazee and osayewenre came to help me,they
forcefully pull off her trouser,her top,including her
panties,leaving her totally naked,i won't tell you
the details of the body structure but I tell you she
is so beautiful that immediately the lust i felt for
her back then came back in full force, my manhood
was now hard as rock and my desire to eat from her
honey pot started to take control over me,osaretin,
osazee and osayewenre laid her on the floor,
osayewenre holded her hands while osaretin and
osazee was holding her legs,she couldn't fight back
(how she be wan take do am,she be jet li) i immediately
pull down my trouser to my kneel and went into her
Jerusalem without hesitation, she scream so loud as I
entered her pu**y, osaretin, osazee and osayewenre
let of her hands and legs immediately i was in,i took
it up from there,i was now in control,i must confess
her pu**y was so tight i could feel every pleasure
from it as I go in out of her,if i say i was in
paradise i am mistaken, heaven ne understatement,
i was really enjoying everybit of it that i didn't
want to stop,her honey pot was the most sweetest
of all the girls i have tasted so far,i had her
all to myself for now,and i was glad that i was the
only one that will know the feeling of her honey pot.

.....to be continue.....
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Episode 16



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