Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:


He smiled at her as she walked in but he did not get up, Karen sighed as she walked towards his oak table: it was littered with documents and notepads.

“You won’t even look at me?” she scoffed but he said nothing, at first. Karen sat on the chair in front of the table and smiled, this time it was a sad little smile.

“You look drawn”, he replied slowly eyeing her intently and she sighed again and rubbed her temple in a therapeutic manner.

“I feel it.” She hadn’t slept for days thinking and thinking of what to do next, what card to play, mending her broken heart since his mother in law had burst out that her daughter was pregnant.

The room fell silent; there was nothing either of them could say. Karen lit the last stick of cigarette from the pack and he got out the ashtray “How is she?”

“Who?”

“Your wife”, the words dripped with venom.

“She’s fine” he replied gently “She got discharged yesterday. Her mother has been beside her ever since.”

“Is she really pregnant?”

“Where you hoping it were a lie?”

Karen nodded; “I hoped you’d say it was a sick joke anything but the truth”, she sniffed.

“Karen”, he held her hand gently “I am sorry but please don’t be hard on yourself.”

She snickered and drew in the smoke from the cigarette “I feel betrayed Tunde, after all the years of waiting and the promises.”

“I made no promises, Karen. Yes, I cared for you then but I made no promises.”

“You cared? You said you loved me!”

Tunde said nothing.

“You made it look like a fairy tale, as though I was worth something!”

“You are”, he replied desperately “You would always be worth something but I’m sorry it came to this.”

She shook her head and got up, leaving the cigarette butt to burn off in the small tray. Karen walked to the high glass windows looking out at the busy road beneath them. It was time to play her last card.

“How is the work?”

Tunde let out a difficult breath “We’re hanging in there waiting for the auditors to look through the files.”

“Your father could be jailed if they found anything that puts him in jeopardy”, she replied in a small voice.

“I know.” He closed his eyes briefly and loosed the knot of the dark tie around his neck. The room fell silent, the tension was not hard to identify even though they wanted to ignore it.

“Tunde…” Her voice was so sad and wistful… it broke, she sighed, uncertain. “I still love you and I would always do.”

“Karen I…”

“Shhh” she turned to face him “I know what you want to say and I have accepted it that there’s nothing else I can do but…I’m still your friend right?”

She held his gaze and he nodded unable to pull out of it.

“I found out something a while ago but I wasn’t sure until recently. I had these few days to think deeply and I feel you should know if the woman you have pledged your life for is worth it, I’ll accept fate only after that.”

“What do you mean?” Tunde asked

“Exactly what I said!” her voice rose in her anxiety.

“What is it about?”

“It’s about your wife” She kept quiet but he did not respond, she continued “Tunde…”

“What about her? What is this about Karen?”

“Priscilla…” she paused “I’m sorry I didn’t say this earlier but I need you to know the kind of woman you love. I don’t want to see you hurt.”

“What did she do?” he fought for control.

“She cheated on you Tunde”

His expression darkened but he said nothing.

“She cheated”, Karen continued slowly. “I saw them together but I thought my eyes were deceiving me, Tunde.”

“Is this another one of your sick schemes? I know what you can do to get what you want.”

She looked hurt “I can’t believe you just said that”, Karen replied defensively.

“I can’t believe you just said that Karen!” His voice rose. “Don’t you think it’s too convenient to tell me now that she’s pregnant?”

“You can ask her if you think I’m evil enough to plot something like that!” she replied, with a wounded expression on her face.

Tunde got up and closed his eyes briefly trying to calm his temper “I think that is a wild accusation Karen”, he replied unsteadily.

“I found out the day we went for that dinner party, I saw them together Tunde and I confirmed it last week.”

“Then why didn’t you say something?”

“Would you have believed me?” she retorted softly.

“What’s to say I believe you now?” Tunde replied turning away from her gaze. “I think you should stay out of our business.”

“Fine”, Karen threw her hands up in the air with exasperation “Ask her who Richard is.”

“Richard?” Tunde echoed “Your Richard?”

“I found it hard to believe also”, she replied laughing in disbelief at the situation. Tears began to form again. “At first I thought my eyes were deceiving me until he confirmed it when we were going home.”

“It’s impossible” his tone was thick in growing anger “You don’t know for a fact that…”

Her shrill laugh sent a chill down his spine. “You don’t want to believe it, do you? The woman you love and who carries your child! What’s to say the child is even yours, Tunde?”

His heart began to pound “I think you should stay out of our affair Karen,” Tunde looked at her again and his mouth quirked an icy look. “Thank you for the care you took in telling me.”

Karen walked to him and stopped at his feet. “Don’t be a fool, Tunde! That bitch has you wrapped around her finger, for all you know it’s a bastard child growing inside her and she’s putting her sick premeditated plan on you!”

Tunde’s hand came up poised to strike Karen. With a great difficulty he moved away from her heated gaze.

“So Tunde”, she sighed and turned back to him with hatred in her eyes. “You were prepared to slap me because of that thing!”

“Get out of my office, Karen.”His tone was dead and controlled and Tunde looked back at her with the same fire in his eyes, she was shocked and she stared at him trying to read him as though he was not the same person who loved her years ago. “Get out!” He barked again.

A tear slid out of the corner of her eye and she shook her head in dismay. “I don’t know who you are anymore.” With that, Karen walked out of his office, slamming the door.

Tunde winced and slumped into his chair, his head was reeling, aching. He wiped his face with a sweaty palm trying to calm himself. He closed his eyes trying to keep her voice out of his head. His hands trembled, his body trembling and screaming in pain. He was panting trying to block out his wife’s taunting voice, her laughter mocking him, mocking him of his stupidity. Tunde slammed his fist hard on the table; a precious tear of shame scalded his cheek.

***

“She knows mummy, I swear she knows.”

“Put yourself together Priscilla,” her mother scolded at by the bedpost in the guest room. Her daughter sat on the edge of the bed fretting, sweating and looking disheveled.

“I can’t sleep, I can’t sleep without thinking about it: the knowing look on her face”, Priscilla replied almost hysterical. She had been on edge since the party; even the doctor had to calm her down but it did not help. Her mind was in bits and pieces and her body screamed for rest. “Priscilla you can’t keep panicking, it’s not good for your child. You need to be patient and wait”, Sola replied not even trusting her words. She was already drawing out other plans, other ways of keeping their marriage intact.

“You shouldn’t have announced my pregnancy mother. You shouldn’t.”

“Not when she was goading you and making passes at your husband”, she replied defensively. “The family needed to know that things have changed. She needed to know that.”

Finally, she looked up at her mother and held back her words seeing the worried look in her deep brown eyes as she choked back another sob.

“I don’t know what to do” she bit her already sore lips. “I don’t know what to do if he found out.”

“You will try to keep your marriage intact. It will be your word against hers Priscilla; no one needs to find out again.”

“I can’t look him in his face and lie again mum, I’m tired of that. The lies are growing and soon we won’t be able to know what we truly stand for.”

“Stand for?” She stamped her foot on the tiled floor in growing exasperation “Stand for, Priscilla? Christ! Do you intend to tell him the truth and let him get boiling mad?!”

She looked at her mother through red-rimmed eyes “We can’t keep this up.”

“Think of your child for heaven’s sake! How do you think you can cope as a single mother? ”

Her mother stooped down to her and placed a hand on her small shoulder. “Save everything while you still can or destroy your marriage and all that you have worked for because of your weak conscience”, her eyes were hard and cold.

Priscilla looked at her mother, too weak to argue. Her mind was not settled, thinking of the party. Her husband, her marriage, it would cost her his love!

“I can’t lose him mum”

“Then think of the only solution I have laid before you!” she cried emphatically “It’s your word against hers Priscilla and lucky you have managed to make your husband eat out of your palm.”

Sola got up and drew up her bag from the other end of the bed. “I’m leaving today Priscilla.” She folded the wrapper on the already laid bed and put it in the bag zipping it. She stilled “Priscilla, look at me.”

She turned to stare at her mother

“Don’t mess this up, not for your whims and idiosyncrasies” her tone was flat. Priscilla slowly nodded in response…



…SOLA opened the door of the lonely flat and carried the little travelling bag in; she removed the key from the door cylinder and shut the metal door behind her. With a sigh, she slumped on the nearest couch and closed her eyes in deep thought.

The house was silent, the way it ought to be. She let out a deep breath and the tension steaming of her in the cool caressing breeze. What had she done? She knew when it was too late. She had made a bad move not considering the other lady’s possible game plans but then how was anyone to know that the man seated beside her as an escort was her daughter’s mistake, possibly the father of her grandchild?

Sola sighed again, this time she felt like screaming but she could not give up now not when she could not even remember what it felt like to suffer. She would not be able to bear the shame, to look back and be the way her mother was: a sad failure. Her lips twitched in determination, she would rather die.

She shifted in her seat, brainstorming on what to do. Her mind was in turmoil until a bible verse crawled into her shadowed mind, and she knew what to do next.

Sola Imorugbe would be patient, she would wait but not upon God for He had shown her a way out and it made her smile in appreciation. Perhaps, it was soon time to ask another favor from Tayo. This time a devious chuckle escaped from her lips thinking of her former lover. With that, she knelt down and prayed.

***

Tunde turned the key to the house slowly in its hole, he watched with a clouded mind- how it slowly turned until the door opened. He felt that way, as though a rusty knife had twisted in his chest. His mouth was bitter and his head a little too light from the generous amount of alcohol consumed in his office.

He took a heavy step into the parlor and gently closed the door behind him with a click. Rage made him cold and as dead as the still night air around him. He felt cheated, betrayed and disgraced, playing the past months repeatedly in his sickened mind like a broken record.

The house was dark with only the moonlight flooding the parlor, the curtains were still drawn up and he caught the whip of water running. She was in the shower and his treacherous body raced with desire and fueled his anger. The brief case slid down the leather chair making a soft zee sound until it landed in his seat. He loosened his tie and walked towards the corridor and into the moonlit room like a zombie.

His mind screamed for control but his body protested until he yielded and removed his clothes dropping them on the rugged floor towards the bathroom he could hear Priscilla humming oblivious to him and he slid the door open.

“You’re back”, she smiled at him with a look that should have made him think she was pleasantly surprised but he doubted it, now. He could see fear and anguish lying somewhere in the dark contours of her eyes. He did not trust himself to speak but he walked to the tub where she stood, her body glistening under the soft yellow bulb and the scent of her engulfing the bathroom.

He did not hear her question again; he was driven by anger and blinded with desire. Tunde pulled his wife out of the shower with his hate growing and his desire monstrous, they made love.



….PRISCILLA panted beside her husband wondering what had gotten into him. He had never been this forceful before. He had never gotten up with a savage look on his face after what they shared. Unease began to set in but instead of speaking, she wrapped the white sheet around her chest, her hands trembled a bit and her body felt damp again with sweat.

After what seemed to be hours, the silence became a torment, she spoke in a small worried voice.

“Tunde what’s wrong?”

He turned his back to her tightening the string of his slacks around his waist. Beads of perspiration glistened on his smooth bare back leaving her to watch them trickle down his back as his muscles worked to achieve the task.

Priscilla slowly got up with the white sheet tied around her body and walked to her husband. Hesitantly, her hand touched him, his shoulder and the body beneath her hand stilled.

“What is the matter Tunde?”

He said nothing, he just stood there as though he was counting out his patience but her hand gripped a bit tighter at the flesh beneath it.

“What is the matter? You’ve been acting really strange for 2 days now Tunde and I need to know what’s going on.”

He walked away from her and switched on the bedroom light, the fluorescent responded immediately. Priscilla watched him with growing agitation, but he said nothing. Tunde sat on the edge of the dressing table stool and let out a deep breath rubbing this temple.

“Tunde I don’t like how you are behaving. You came in here two days ago acting strange and I have been concerned, if I did something wrong let me know. What’s the point in us being in a marriage when there is no communication at a time like this?”

For the first time he scoffed “Communication?” Tunde replied slowly in a low tone “What is your definition of that word?”

“Tunde…” She walked to him but stopped halfway in mounting fear “Tunde what brought that question?”

“I asked you, what is your definition of communication?” his voice rose. “Is that what you have been preaching about for a successful marriage?”

Priscilla shook her head in confusion “I don’t understand where all this is coming from”, her hand grabbed the silk robe on the chair and she threw it on shakily over the wrapper. “Please tell me what the matter is Tunde, this silence is killing me.”

He said nothing and she shivered when she met his gaze full of scorn, it was worse than the look he gave her when things where bad between them months ago. This was different. It was murderous. She knew then, and the realization registered on her face. He knew, God, he knew! Tunde read the look of confusion on her face, they knew what it was hanging between them over the bed for the past two days and he was up for suddenly the room felt too small but he could not stop there even though his heart pleaded not to speak, his anger was boiling over.

“Tunde”, Priscilla replied in a small voice catching the lump in her throat “What exactly is this about?”

“Who is Richard to you?”

Priscilla stepped back in fear she could have lost her balance, her heart began to race.

“You heard me!” Tunde’s voice thundered and he got up to tower over her.

Priscilla opened her mouth to speak but no words came, she stammered and stumbled on her words, he seemed suddenly like a giant sucking in the air around her.

“Talk!” he thundered again looking at her in scorn.

“He…he…I don’t understand why you would ask such a question”, she stammered with her eyes darting back and forth in fear “Tunde…”

“You cheated on me!” He thundered with a monstrous look that frightened her; he was breathing heavily, sweat forming on his brows.

“Tunde I…”

“Don’t call my name”, Tunde shouted slamming his fist on the dressing table, it left a dent, Priscilla staggered back wincing in fright. The room fell silent with only the sound of his ragged breathing and her quiet sobbing.

“Did you or did you not cheat?”

The sobbing stopped and she looked at her husband’s face, the frustration in his eyes. Her mother’s words came to mind, it was her word against Karen’s. Weak tears of deceit fell from her eyes “Tunde please…”

He took out a shirt and took his car keys from the table, his hands shook pulling on the shirt “Shit!” Tunde cursed at the ceiling “Shit!” the keys jingled in his hands and he walked towards the door, Priscilla followed behind crying.

“Tunde…” she called out to him as he walked through the dark corridor to the moonlit sitting room with the full moon making silhouettes of the objects.”Tunde… Where are you going? Please let’s talk.”

“About what?” , he turned round to face her, his eyes full of hatred her body nearly bucked under it.

“You can’t leave at this time” she replied desperately “Its almost 11, please let’s talk I beg you.” Tears racked through her frame and Priscilla slowly knelt down. “Please Tunde, I love you.”

“Don’t ever say that again,” he replied in a cold tone “You have no right to use that word” his eyes burnt through her making her flinch clinging desperately to her sanity. She wailed in pain “Please Tunde, please. I was lonely and I was lost and I thought you were having an affair, I felt broken and…”

“Don’t give me that excuse, it’s too cheap! What lover? I’m not like you, I didn’t choose to defy my vows at any point so don’t bring Karen into this!”

“Pl…Please Tunde; I’m pregnant at least for the sake of the child.”

He shook his head “A child who may not be mine? Was this part of the plan to trick me into thinking that…thing inside you is mine?”

She flinched as though he hit her. “Tunde please” her voice was too heavy with emotions trying to say so much “I’m not like that…”

“Yet you kept your secret away from me?”

“Would you have reacted any different from now? Priscilla asked in tears.

He paused and shook his head in affirmation “It would have saved you from looking like a conspirator if I had heard it first from you”, his tone was soft and regretful. “I can’t tell what’s worse between a snake and the Irumogbe family!” Tunde snickered, “You all leech on people, destroy them as long as you are satisfied. I don’t blame you; I blame my father for pushing us all into this!” His tone was bitter

“What do you mean?” Priscilla asked with confusion.

“What do you think I mean? There is no need pretending not to know how you got your claws into my family! I’d rather have married the devil.”

“Tunde”, her voice was shaking in confusion and her mind in unruly, her head began to pound, and her chest throbbed.

“Ask your mother – she slept with my father!”

Priscilla’s knees gave way in shock. She sat on the floor, the silk robe slid off her shoulder to the cold tiled ground “Tunde what are you saying?” She tried making sense from what she just heard “Tunde….”

“I give you till 12noon tomorrow, I don’t want to see you when I get back.” With that, he walked out of the flat slamming the door behind him.

The sound echoed in her head but it did nothing to erase what he just said. Her mother and Chief Ariyo? She began to pant, tears streaming down her face. Her mind was crowded and the ache in her heart hurt so badly she wailed in her tears. It did not matter how long she laid on the cold tiled floor weeping and waiting, hopeful that he would come. He never showed up even when she cried herself to sleep.

>>

Hey guys,lets know what u think about.
Man1: don't try to get out of there or i will shoot u with this gun.
Man2: Are u threatening me or what,just one step out of here u will die.
Nairajokers what do u think of this Men?.
who will first die or are they going to die at the same time?
use the comment box below
.#B-goF







NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-12-12 02:11:45

1675 Views




If the information contained in the DNA could be written down, it would fill a 1000 volume encyclopediaRelated

Mr Marcus came down to nigeria, he was very angry about the whole incident, Mr and Mrs Marcus went to the police station,they were called by the D.P.O ,they arrived at the police station,they told the police attendant that they were on appointment, they were lead by one of the police man to the D.P.O office, after they exchange greetings they were all sitted.

D.P.O :well I called both of you here because of the new development in the case of your son.

Mr Marcus :i was told this morning that the criminal has been arrested, so I want to see the face of that idiot that wanted to kill my son,where is he.

Mrs ada Marcus :we want to see him first before i will have anything to say

D.P.O :that Is the reason why I called the both of you,yes we arrested the boy this morning but his lawyer came here to bail him,so we granted him bail

Mr and Mrs Marcus was surprise and shocked about what the d.p.o was saying, Mr Marcus got angry

Mr Marcus :what are you saying, that you allow a criminal to go,are you serious

Mrs ada Marcus :this is unbelievable

D. P. O:you have to calm down,i can understand your anger,but you see we had no choice.

Mr Marcus :what are you saying, i mean there are enough evidence already, didn't his finger print matches with that on the gun,so what more do you need.

D. P.O:but that's not enough evidence,there was no witness and beside they might turn the story around, this case is not as easy as you think,the people involved are very influential.

Mr Marcus :what an insult, so because they are influential he can't be brought to book.

D. P.O:yes he can,but it will be a wastage of your income and time,even if we charge the case to court, it will be dismissed, it is a fight you cannot win mr marcus

Mrs ada Marcus :this is serious, so who is his father that is untouchable

D.P.O:am sorry madam i can't tell you,his identity should not be disclosed at cases like this but he sent a message to you,he said he is very sorry for what his son did that he never supported him in anyway and he promise to deal with him his own way,he knows money cannot heal your son pain but he will have to hold responsibility for your son treatment till his recovering, he will also like to compensate your son with this sum of money.

He brought out a big brown evalop containing money and he put it on the table.

D.P.O:it's ten million naira,listen i am a father like you and i will know what I will do to any one that try to kill my son but if I was in your shoe now i will think about this offer because if he gave this money right here to any judge he won't think twice before accepting it,at least think about this, your son can do something better with this kind of money, you should drop the case and let this pass.

Mrs and Mrs Marcus didn't know what to do or say ,they both thought about the offer and later accepted,they left the d.p.o office and went to see maxwell in the hospital, they told him everything that happened, maxwell was not happy that chidi was set free but he was till glad that at least all this brought him both money and the woman he loves.

*********************************

It was now two day since chidi return from the police station, he was in the sitting room with jude,emma and Godwin, they were all smoking and drinking.they wasn't any joy on their faces.

Godwin :dis tin dey surprising to me oh,why e go con talk dat kind lie say u shot am

Chidi :ne so I see am oh

Jude:nd everybody believe am

Emma :everything just dey like shock to me and he non mention say i dey dere o

Chidi:he thought he could lock me up ,hmmmmmm, well he tryed

Jude:all this for one girl,wait o if une non shot am who go do am

Godwin :ne wan for you oooo,see d kind question you dey ask, ne him shot himself ne

Emma :i no fit imagine say maxwell go want kill himself, that guy ne devil

Chidi:he non wan kill himself, he do am to get amara and he succeed

Emma :i know you are till hurt that amara left you but you really need to forget that girl,look at all the mess she is making you go through, i blame myself, if I haven't introduce her to you maybe all this couldn't have happened,

Chidi:come on,please don't blame yourself ,you were only doing something you thought will be good for me,it was all spoilt by that devil ,but I am more hurt because amara who should stand by me wouldn't even believe me,i wasn't expecting her to turn her back on me,i so much love that girl

Emma :we know, but look around you she doesn't deserve you,you need someone better

Chidi:emma,you know me,you know how many girls i have had,and you know that having any girl is not a problem but amara is different

Godwin :guy if ne the way she take dey handle you for bed forget am,babes dey wan go do am pass her

Chidi smile )that's where you get it wrong, i have never had sex with amara

They were all surprised,because chidi wasn't a guy that won't want to get into a women honeypot

Chidi :we do kiss and romance but it always ends there

Jude:i till don't get,you mean all this months you have been dating nothing happened

Chidi :no

Jude:why ne

Chidi :she is till intact

Godwin :you non mean am

Chidi :i was just waiting for the right time,she didn't want to be rushed, but now I don't think that time will come.

Emma :you will till love again

Chidi :but how emma how,i have already heard of being in love,each time I saw you and Sandra i thought to myself this people are being childish, remember when we went clubbing and i so wanted you to bleep one girl with me remember what you told me

Emma :that i love my woman and won't want to cheat on her

Chidi :yeah,i saw you that day like a fool that don't want to enjoy the things of life,but now I understand that feeling and am happy i did,all thanks to you men

Godwin :i swear if I see that guy i go break he leg

Chidi :make une free am a beg

Jude :this was the same words you use the other time,now see where it has landed you

Godwin :jude,u no go watch your language, u don forget who u dey talk to

Jude:non vex,i dey vex

Chidi :i know you are right but what ever you do to him ever now won't change anything, it will only increase my dad anger towards me,he is really upset with me and because of that he said i should go to London to complete my studies

Emma :you are leaving us

Jude :for how long will you be gone

Chidi :don't know, i really don't

Godwin hhhhh,why ne

Chidi :i will till be communicating with you guys,okey

Jude:when are you leaving

Chidi :next week

They were all sad that chidi will be leaving not even knowing when to come back, they could miss him so much because he was more then just a friend,chidi gave them most of his belongings.

*******************************

It was the day that chidi was leaving for London, his luggage has been put in the car,his father and mother are in the sitting room,the driver that will take him to the airport is waiting for him outside, chidi came down from the stairs, Mr Jonathan was sitting down,immediately chidi knelt down before him and Mrs Jonathan.

Chidi:dad,mum am sorry for everything i have done to both of you,dad please find a place in your heart to forgive me

Mrs Jonathan looked at Mr Jonathan

Mrs Jonathan :please darling forgive him,can't you see he is really sorry

Mr Jonathan:get up

Chidi got up

Mr Jonathan :you are my son,and i love you so much,apologising is not the problem but keeping to your words are,as long as you behave yourself you won't have problem with me

Chidi :i promise dad i will do the right thing and make you proud

Then they hug,they all went outside and chidi left to the airport, it was a goodbye to everything he ever knows,he will miss everyone mostly amara.


******TO BE CONTINUED *****

LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS AND
CONTINUE TO READ

WHO LOVE ME MOST SEASON 2

>>

Smart Phone [Read it]


Guy 1: Bros, abeg borrow me your phone to call my girlfriend, I no get credit now.
Guy 2: No problem, just do quick (hands phone to friend)
Guy 1: Thank you guy. (dials girlfriend’s number, makes a quick phone call and then returns happy and excited)
Guy 1: O boy, this your phone na correct phone oh, shebi na bb?
Guy 2: Yes oh, na blackberry smart phone.
Guy 1: Kai, no wonder dem dey call am ‘smart phone’, the phone too know something, you believe say as I type my girlfriend number for your phone come dial am, the thing show the number as ‘My love’, how your phone take know say na my girlfriend I dey call ? chei, this your phone smart no be small!


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-09-24 22:39:53

196 Views




The Colonel spoke in hushed tones captivating
the attention of Sean and Eva with his unique
plan. He told them about his history with the
General and brought to light secrets they never
knew. He explained how his son was killed
and how he had been on the trail of the
Ghosts Corporation. He made his speech quick
and straight to the point, with no emotions.
He spoke as a matter of fact and did not hide
his intentions. He wanted the General dead
which also meant taking down GhostCorp.
They were either with him on this or against
him.
He explained that he had killed Tawo in self-
defense when he was ambushed in his hotel
room. In return Ahmed was killed. The Colonel
wanted retribution. And he would not stop till
he got it.
“It was so easy to get to you two. If I wanted
you dead, you would be dead. Taking you
down along with Marcus would be silly when I
know I can have you on my side. Think about
it.” The Colonel said.
He handed them a little chip attached to a
small paper. Sean looked at the note.
“This whole room is bugged. Get to a safe
place and use this chip on a brand new phone.
Make sure you are alone.”
Sean looked up at the Colonel and nodded.
“One more thing. I have relocated your
parents. I have released both your mums from
the men who were keeping them hostage.
They are currently on a plane out of the
country as we speak. You are not required to
act under duress anymore.” The Colonel
finished.
Sean could not believe his ears. He had tried
to locate his mum but all his efforts were
futile. He knew his mother was safe. He spoke
to her regularly. He knew she was in Mushin
but he did not know where exactly she was.
She was moved around a lot and she was not
allowed to disclose her location.
He had called her one night and she had
broken down in tears. She was scared. One of
the goons that the Corporation had protecting
her had just shot and killed someone in front
of her. She was scared and was begging Sean
to return home as soon as possible.
Sean reassured his mother that all that was
happening was for her own good and that he
would be home soon. Now this man had taken
his mother from under his nose and relocated
her. He was beginning to take this man
seriously.
“How do I know you are not leading me on?
How can I trust you?” Sean asked.
“For one, you are still alive. Second, no matter
what you decide, I will hand your mother to
you. I just want you to read up everything you
have on that chip. Then make your decision.
We’ll go on from there.” The Colonel replied.
“How do I get in touch with you?” Sean asked.
“You don’t find me. I find you. I will establish
contact at 18:00hrs.” The Colonel replied.
He turned and looked at his daughter.
Emotions welled up in his heart. He wanted to
reach out to her. Hug her. Listen to her and
catch up on all the years they had been apart.
But he couldn’t. At least not yet. Before now
no one new that he had a daughter. The
people closest to him were all dead. Ahmed
was dead. Abbey his son was dead. His wife
died during a complication while giving birth
to his son. Involving Eva in an emotional
triangle would not be good for any of them.
“Eva, I know about all your take outs. I have
passed some fake information to the police
and it has taken them off your trail. I am
aware of every move you have made thus far.
You were pretty careless.” The Colonel said.
He brought out a tiny mini disc from his hip
pocket and handed it to her.
“Here is all you need to do to take the agency
off your trail. Marcus had been so blinded by
his desire for revenge that he forgot to cover
his loopholes. I have done that for him.
However, when you finish cleaning up the
mess, you need to get out. Lay low. By the
time I am done, you will be a free woman. And
if I am still alive, we will talk.” The Colonel
finished.
Eva made to get up, but the Colonel gave her
a very stern look. Eva remembered the infra-
red target marker and relaxed again.
“I am done here. I will contact you in nine
hours Sean. Or is it Agent Bravo? I think this
would be a good time to call your Sidekick,
Bruno. I intercepted his email too. He is
waiting for your contact. There’s a full chicken
in the oven in the kitchen. It would be
completely cooked in ten minutes. When you
hear the sound, then you can get up. Not
before.” The Colonel finished.
He picked the cartridges on the floor and
inserted them back into the guns. He put
them back in the double gun hostler he had
strapped on. As he walked towards the door,
he looked back at Eva. They were still rooted
to the spot their bums on the chair.
He shut the door after him without another
word.
Immediately they heard the sound of the Oven
that the chicken was done, Eva and Sean got
off the chair with light speed in opposite
directions. Eva turned the table in the sitting
room and hid behind it. Sean crouched behind
the couch, using it as a shield. Both were
expecting a barrage of gun fire. They stood
still for seconds expecting the windows to
shatter any moment. Nothing happened.
After two minutes of waiting, Sean got up and
courageously walked towards the window. He
kept to the dark side of the room, avoiding
getting into the line of fire. He stood by the
side of the glass windows and bent slowly, his
eyes trying to catch a glimpse of the sniper
who was aimed at them. As a trained sniper
himself, one of the trainings he had undergone
was how to locate a sniper in the tallest of
buildings. His eyes had been carefully
adjusted and perfected to single out snipers at
whatever distance they were shooting from.
He was careful at first taking care to make
sure only his left eye was visible from the
window. He quickly pulled his head back.
Nothing happened. He repeated this again.
Still nothing happened. He got bolder, put out
his whole head and pulled back in one swift
motion. No gun shot. He relaxed by the
window and breathed hard. Eva was watching
him and was scared to death. She worried that
Sean might get himself killed trying to dare
the sniper who was somewhere outside the
hotel. She shook her head at Sean. She knew
he was about to do something crazy and she
feared the outcome. Hiding behind the table,
she shook her head vigorously at Sean,
communicating with him not to try what he
was thinking of doing. Sean winked at her and
smiled. He nodded.
Sean put out his right hand expecting it to be
shot at. Eva closed her eyes. Nothing
happened. Sean waved it a few times. Still
nothing happened. He noticed the infra-red
target marker on his palm as he waved.
“What in hell?” Sean said as he came to a
sudden realization.
He left the side of the window and stood in
the line of fire, arms akimbo. The target
marker was on his neck. He moved sideways
to his right and stretched his left arm. The
marker was on his shoulder.
“Come on out Eva. There’s no sniper out
there. It’s a decoy.” Sean said, standing again
directly in the line of fire.
Eva got up and came to where Sean was. She
stood beside him, and waved her hands
around the target marker. Nothing happened.
She turned and hugged Sean very tight. Seeing
her father had brought back memories and
emotions that she had buried for three years.
She cried on his shoulder. Sean held her tight
and didn’t say a word. He let her express
herself.
Five minutes later he whispered to her ears.
“Your father is right. He would not have come
all this way for nothing. Let’s get out of here.”
Sean said.
On the roof of an insurance building 100
meters north of Sean’s window, The Colonel
lay flat on his stomach. He knew Sean had an
eye for spotting snipers, so he had already
painted his sniper rifle blue. He painted his
face blue as he drove to the building and wore
a blue face cap.
He watched the drama in the pent house and
smiled as Sean stood in the line of fire. He
was tempted to take him out. When Eva
hugged Sean tight and cried, The Colonel’s
already weakened heart gave way. A tear fell
from his left eye, while his right was glued in
the scope attached to the rifle. He pressed a
hand to his right ear. He had dropped a bug
in the room immediately he barged in.
He heard Sean say they had to leave and how
he was right. The Colonel silently prayed that
he had done the right thing by bringing Sean
and his daughter in. He had no choice. He
needed every one he could get on his side. He
packed his weapons and left the rooftop.
**********************************
Ambrose was walking towards a parked car
when he got the message from Sophia. There
was nothing he could do. He was walking with
Special Agent Ken. He had no doubt in his
mind that once he got into that waiting car he
was going to be history. He had about thirteen
more steps till the door opened. Ambrose
looked around the terminal. He picked out
about 6 cops in strategic positions. They were
watching him but were hiding it very perfectly.
He smiled as he remembered the story that
Agent Ken had cooked up. He was good.
Agent Ken was supposed to kill him but when
that did not work he had quickly concocted a
backup story and was now leading him to his
end.
Six steps more.
Ambrose needed to take a decision. He needed
to act.
As they got to the car, Ambrose hit Ken in the
ribs with his elbow and broke into a run. Two
cops got out of the car and screamed at
Ambrose.
“Stop!” pointing their pistols at him.
He was already twelve meters away,
zigzagging through the crowd. The cops could
not risk taking a shot as innocent civilians
might be harmed.
Half a dozen cops pursued him threatening to
shoot and shouting at civilians to give way.
The whole train terminal was in commotion as
Ambrose pushed bystanders aside and ran
through the crowded station. People dived
away from the path of the ensuing fracas as
the cops gradually closed the gap between
them and Ambrose.
Just then the train began to move. It started
to move slowly and gradually picked up.
Ambrose moved to his right and ran after the
train. The train gained momentum and was
picking up pace. Ambrose tried to get in
through the last door but it closed shut before
he could put his hand in between the doors to
close it. There was a tunnel approaching. The
cops were eight meters behind him. The crowd
was thinning. He had no choice.
He took one last bold step and plunged
forwards. His right hand caught a panel at the
back of the train while his boots grazed the
rail track. He managed to pull himself up and
hold on to the panel that saved his life. The
cops paused and shot into the darkness at the
train. Ambrose was already on the roof of the
train.
“Set up a blockade at the Maitama
intersection. I need eyes in the sky! I want him
dead or alive! I prefer the former. Somebody,
get me that bastarrd!” Special Agent Ken
shouted to no one in particular.
The cops around him scrambled away, making
calls and walking away.
The Agent did not move. He continued to
stare surprisingly into the darkness of the
tunnel.


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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** Sense pass sense **


An American lawyer and a Nigerian are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that Nigerians are so dumb that he can fool them easily..,....,. so the lawyer asks if the naija guy would like to play a fun game. The nigerian is tired and just wants to rest, so he politely declines and tries to catch some sleep. The lawyer persists and says that the game is a lot of fun "I ask u a question and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only 5dollars; you ask me one and if I dont know the answer, I will pay u $500. 
As naija no be dull guys naau, this catches the nigerian's attention and to keep d lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
The lawyer asks d 1st question "what's the distance from earth to the moon? 
The naija guy doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket pulls out 5dollars the hands it to the lawyer. Now, it's the omo naija turn. He ask the lawyer, "what goes up a mountain with 3 legs and comes down with four?
The lawyer uses his laptop, searches the internet and even the Library of Congress. He sends emails to all his smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After 1 hour of futile searching, he finally gives up. He wakes the naija guy and hands him $500. The nigerian pockets the $500 and goes right back to sleep.
The lawyer is going crazy not knowing the answer. 


So he wakes the naija guy up the asks, "well, so what goes up a mountain with 3 legs and comes down with four? The nigerian reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer 5dollars and goes back to sleep.  


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-07 17:54:56

632 Views




BJP : Congress is corrupt.

Congress : BJP is corrupt.

AAP : BJP & Congress both are corrupt.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Common man : The Porn Video I downloaded is corruptRelated

A mad man in a psychiatric hospital climbed on a branch of a tree and stayed there for half of the day.

He suddenly let go off the branch and fell forcefully on to the ground. A doctor ran to him and asked, ''What happened?. He replied, ''I'm ripe!.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-26 12:42:16

465 Views




Mujhse Poocha kisi ne k Mohabbat

ka Izhar

Kaise

Karoge…….??

Maine bhi Muskura kar Keh diya…..

.

.

.

.

{ -_- }

.Muh Se.Related

Chapter 1
When the vicar's wife went off with a young and penniless man the scandal knew no bounds. Her two little girls were only seven and nine years old respectively. And the vicar was such a good husband. True, his hair was grey. But his moustache was dark, he was handsome, and still full of furtive passion for his unrestrained and beautiful wife.
Why did she go? Why did she burst away with such an éclat of revulsion, like a touch of madness?
Nobody gave any answer. Only the pious said she was a bad woman. While some of the good women kept silent. They knew.
The two little girls never knew. Wounded, they decided that it was because their mother found them negligible.
The ill wind that blows nobody any good swept away the vicarage family on its blast. Then lo and behold! the vicar, who was somewhat distinguished as an essayist and a controversialist, and whose case had aroused sympathy among the bookish men, received the living of Papplewick. The Lord had tempered the wind of misfortune with a rectorate in the north country.
The rectory was a rather ugly stone house down by the river Papple, before you come into the village. Further on, beyond where the road crosses the stream, were the big old stone cotton-mills, once driven by water. The road curved uphill, into the bleak stone streets of the village.
The vicarage family received decided modification, upon its transference into the rectory. The vicar, now the rector, fetched up his old mother and his sister, and a brother from the city. The two little girls had a very different milieu from the old home.
The rector was now forty-seven years old, he had displayed an intense and not very dignified grief after the flight of his wife. Sympathetic ladies had stayed him from suicide. His hair was almost white, and he had a wild-eyed, tragic look. You had only to look at him, to know how dreadful it all was, and how he had been wronged.
Yet somewhere there was a false note. And some of the ladies, who had sympathised most profoundly with the vicar, secretly rather disliked the rector. There was a certain furtive self- righteousness about him, when all was said and done.
The little girls, of course, in the vague way of children, accepted the family verdict. Granny, who was over seventy and whose sight was failing, became the central figure in the house. Aunt Cissie, who was over forty, pale, pious, and gnawed by an inward worm, kept house. Uncle Fred, a stingy and grey-faced man of forty, who just lived dingily for himself, went into town every day. And the rector, of course, was the most important person, after Granny.
They called her The Mater. She was one of those physically vulgar, clever old bodies who had got her own way all her life by buttering the weaknesses of her men-folk. Very quickly she took her cue. The rector still "loved" his delinquent wife, and would "love her" till he died. Therefore hush! The rector's feeling was sacred. In his heart was enshrined the pure girl he had wedded and worshipped.
Out in the evil world, at the same time, there wandered a disreputable woman who had betrayed the rector and abandoned his little children. She was now yoked to a young and despicable man, who no doubt would bring her the degradation she deserved. Let this be clearly understood, and then hush! For in the pure loftiness of the rector's heart still bloomed the pure white snowflower of his young bride. This white snowflower did not wither. That other creature, who had gone off with that despicable young man, was none of his affair.
The Mater, who had been somewhat diminished and insignificant as a widow in a small house, now climbed into the chief arm-chair in the rectory, and planted her old bulk firmly again. She was not going to be dethroned. Astutely she gave a sigh of homage to the rector's fidelity to the pure white snowflower, while she pretended to disapprove. In sly reverence for her son's great love, she spoke no word against that nettle which flourished in the evil world, and which had once been called Mrs. Arthur Saywell. Now, thank heaven, having married again, she was no more Mrs. Arthur Saywell. No woman bore the rector's name. The pure white snow- flower bloomed in perpetuum, without nomenclature. The family even thought of her as She-who-was-Cynthia.
All this was water on the Mater's mill. It secured her against Arthur's ever marrying again. She had him by his feeblest weakness, his skulking self-love. He had married an imperishable white snowflower. Lucky man! He had been injured! Unhappy man! He had suffered. Ah, what a heart of love! And he had - forgiven! Yes, the white snowflower was forgiven. He even had made provision in his will for her, when that other scoundrel - But hush! Don't even THINK too near to that horrid nettle in the rank outer world! She-who-was-Cynthia. Let the white snowflower bloom inaccessible on the heights of the past. The present is another story.
The children were brought up in this atmosphere of cunning self- sanctification and of unmentionability. They too, saw the snowflower on inaccessible heights. They too knew that it was throned in lone splendour aloft their lives, never to be touched.
At the same time, out of the squalid world sometimes would come a rank, evil smell of selfishness and degraded lust, the smell of that awful nettle, She-who-was-Cynthia. This nettle actually contrived, at intervals, to get a little note through to her girls, her children. And at this the silver-haired Mater shook inwardly with hate. For if She-who-was-Cynthia ever came back, there wouldn't be much left of the Mater. A secret gust of hate went from the old granny to the girls, children of that foul nettle of lust, that Cynthia who had had such an affectionate contempt for the Mater.
Mingled with all this, was the children's perfectly distinct recollection of their real home, the Vicarage in the south, and their glamorous but not very dependable mother, Cynthia. She had made a great glow, a flow of life, like a swift and dangerous sun in the home, forever coming and going. They always associated her presence with brightness, but also with danger; with glamour, but with fearful selfishness.


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Ek Aisa Sawal Jo Aapko Sochne Pe Majbur Kar Dega.

Ladkiya Toilet Se Nikalne Ke Baad Hath Kyu Dhoti Hai, Jabki Unke Pass Pakadne Ke Liye Kuch Hai Hi Nahi. ????Related

true or false [Read it]


1) You buy
your girlfriend ice cream, you
dey sip pure water abi you get
diabeties?
2) You claim say you no dey
cheat on ur guy, yet you dey
receive
different calls for him presence
my sister... You be customer care
agent?
3) You buy your girlfriend suya
you come dey chop onion.... oh
boy you be
vegetarian?
4) You snap different pix with
different cars yet you claim say u
no be
runs girl.... My sister you be
mechanic?
4) You dey sponsor your
girlfriend for university yet you
never write
jamb.... My brother you be
scholarship board?
5) You ask a girl what she
wants, she tells you money and
you are angry,
what do you expect her to say,
wisdom and understanding abi?
6) Your babe get F9 parallel for
WAEC, she still dey ask for
Brazilian Hair
of N150,000, were she wan fix
am? On top of that coconut
head?
7) You have 8 tribal marks
scattered all over ur body, yet
you still want a
tattoo.... Ah my friend you be
zebra?
You are 6.5ft tall , you still come
wear 6 inches high heel shoe...
shey
you wan go moon?
9) You gather different girls pix
for your phone yet you expect
your
girlfriend to believe you are not
cheating.... Uncle you be
photographer?
10) He gave you an engagement
ring for over 5 yrs, he never
marry you,
my dear you be lord of the
rings?
True Or False


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-26 10:22:59

512 Views




Pyar vyar toh ek bahana hai, dil mile na mile lips ko milana hai, yeh style hai sab Ashiko ka,

kya kare yaar yeh Dilip Kumar ka nahi Imran Hasmi ka Zamana hai../:)Related

The Lost Budget [Read it]


I Just Found The Lost 2016 Budget Under My Pillow Yesterday And I Reported To The Nearest Police Station Thats When They Thanked Me And Said I Should Hand It Over To Them For Free
I Then Asked Them Whether They Always Allow Even A Pastor With Bible To Pass In The Road For Free?
And I Left
Pls Guys Should I Hand It Over For Free? Or Collect Money? Then How Much?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-01-21 17:09:08

317 Views




Akpos got to school late on Monday morning:
Teacher: Akpos why did u come to school late?”
Akpos : One man lost #1,000 note at the bus stop
Teacher: “Ooohh! That’s good of you…seems you
were helping the man look for his lost money.
Akpos answered “Nooo! Am I mad? I was standing on
top of the money”



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-11-04 17:11:35

220 Views




Akpos and Ugo were in a super market together and while they were shopping Ugo stole 3 bars of chocolate. 


When they got outside he showed Akpos and told "I am the greatest". Akpos said to him "do you want to see real stealing?" so they went back to the office of the manager and Akpos told him he was a magician and he demanded for 3 bars of chocolate, after eating it he told them to check Ugo's pocket that it was there!


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-03-05 11:17:14

223 Views



Expensive Date [Read it]


A guy takes a girl on a date. She orders costly champagne, oysters, lobsters, the most expensive food on the menu.

The guy asks, “Do you eat like this at your mom’s place?”

The girl replies, “No, my mother doesn’t plan to sleep with me after the meal."



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-11-09 11:25:36

236 Views




1. Extreme hairstyles

A woman with hair full of volumizing product and variously placed bobby pins walks into the room. You think she will attract the attention of all the men at the party. Will it attract attention? Yes, but I doubt if any man wants to get near that rat’s nest for any other reason than to see what is holding all of it up. Most men prefer long, loose, soft and silky hair, not sticky hairspray and hard gels.

2. Masked faces

Foundation is used to hide imperfections, fine lines and blemishes. However, it should be applied as a thin, even layer, and in a shade that blends right in to your skin. Overuse can make it look like you came out with a layer of clay on your face. When applied correctly, no one should be able to tell that you are hiding imperfections on your face. Remember, less is always more.

3. Sticky eyelashes

You know that effect when a woman uses too much mascara — her eyelashes all stick together and smear black with each blink. Nothing about that look is attractive. Use good quality mascara that dries quickly and does not smudge. After applying, use an eyelash brush to remove any excess off of your lashes. Men love beautiful and expressive eyes, free of black clumps.

4. Too much glitter

If you are not a professional makeup artist, it is probably best to stick to the matte shadows. They adhere better and are less likely to concentrate in the crease of your eyelid.

5. Yellow teeth and bad breath

Yellow teeth and bad breath are not attractive to anyone. If you struggle in this area, you should realize that the source of the problem is probably found in poor hygiene. Or maybe you need to cut back on the coffee, black tea or red wine, or lose the cigarettes. Whatever it is, address the source of your problem, and try adding whitening toothpaste and dental floss to brighten your smile. Lozenges or sugar-free breath sprays also help a lot.

6. Lack of body care READ MORE AT

Ochuko and Akpos were sitting under the tree arguing about whose son was more stupid.


Ochuko:Akpos, my son is not just stupid but Dumb as well.
Akpos:Oya make we call them and test them and you will know that my son is daft.


They both sent for their sons and Ochuko's son came first,                  
Ochuko: Ochuko jnr go market and buy me pineapple...(the boy ran off and came back 14mins later to say papa never give am money)
Ochuko: You see my son is dumb and stupid. 


Akpos laughed and said let my son come and you will understand stupid. Akpos jnr came and the father said Akpos go home and ask your mother if i dey home...the boy ran home and came back, then told his father that papa, mama say you no dey house...akpos turned and looked at his friend.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-03-29 22:14:45

227 Views




Akpos and ochoku came to
school late and
their class teacher has
started lecture.
So the teacher asked them
why they came to
school late.
Ochuku answered: ma! I had
a long dream
that's why I came late
Teacher: ok what about you
akpos?
Akpos answered: ma I also
had a long
dream.
Teacher: ok starting from
ochoku, you guys
will tell us what the dream is
all about.
Now ochoku narrate your
dream to the students.
Ochoku: my team was playing
a match with
another team, and they
scored us with
partiality, the referee was
supporting the
other team, so I was
struggling to score a
goal.
Teacher: hmmm, ok akpos
can we hear your
own dream?
Akpos: ma! I was the referee
of the match.
Lol one word for akpos?



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-09-27 06:37:35

752 Views




Eid is the time to share the bounties bestowed on you by Allah. May your love, happiness and wealth grow by sharing it with everyone!

Happy Eid ul Fitr!Related

Great people like us operate on the principle of rockets…. Not that we aim for the sky but until & unless our ass is on fire, we are not going to work.Related

Money is the opposite of the weather. Nobody talks about it, but everybody does something about it.

~ Rebecca JohnsonRelated

Ek good friend wahi hota hai.

Jo pehla aansoo aane par ponch de,

or dusra aane par rok le,

or teesra aaye to

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ek zor ka thapad mere,

or kahe le kamine ab ji bhar ke role.Related

This story will warm your heart...
As I walked home one freezing day, I stumbled on
a wallet someone had lost in the street. I picked it
up and looked inside to find some identification so
I could call the owner. But the wallet contained only three dollars and a crumpled letter that
looked as if it had been in there for years.
The envelope was worn and the only thing that
was legible on it was the return address. I started
to open the letter, hoping to find some clue. Then I
saw the dateline–1924. The letter had been written almost 60 years ago.
It was written in a beautiful feminine handwriting
on powder blue stationery with a little flower in the
left-hand corner. It was a “Dear John” letter that
told the recipient, whose name appeared to be
Michael, that the writer could not see him anymore because her mother forbade it. Even so, she wrote
that she would always love him.
It was signed, Hannah.
It was a beautiful letter, but there was no way
except for the name Michael, that the owner could
be identified. Maybe if I called information, the operator could find a phone listing for the address
on the envelope.
“Operator,” I began, “this is an unusual request.
I’m trying to find the owner of a wallet that I
found. Is there anyway you can tell me if there is a
phone number for an address that was on an envelope in the wallet?”
She suggested I speak with her supervisor, who
hesitated for a moment then said, “Well, there is a
phone listing at that address, but I can’t give you
the number.” She said, as a courtesy, she would
call that number, explain my story and would ask them if they wanted her to connect me.
I waited a few minutes and then she was back on
the line. “I have a party who will speak with you.”
I asked the woman on the other end of the line if
she knew anyone by the name of Hannah. She
gasped, “Oh! We bought this house from a family who had a daughter named Hannah. But that was
30 years ago!”
“Would you know where that family could be
located now?” I asked.
“I remember that Hannah had to place her mother
in a nursing home some years ago,” the woman said. “Maybe if you got in touch with them they
might be able to track down the daughter.”
She gave me the name of the nursing home and I
called the number. They told me the old lady had
passed away some years ago but they did have a
phone number for where they thought the daughter
might be living.
I thanked them and phoned. The woman who
answered explained that Hannah herself was now
living in a nursing home.
This whole thing was stupid, I thought to myself. Why was I making such a big deal over finding the
owner of a wallet that had only three dollars and a
letter that was almost 60 years old?
Nevertheless, I called the nursing home in which
Hannah was supposed to be living and the man
who answered the phone told me, “Yes, Hannah is staying with us.”
Even though it was already 10 p.m., I asked if I
could come by to see her. “Well,” he said
hesitatingly, “if you want to take a chance, she
might be in the day room watching television.”
I thanked him and drove over to the nursing home. The night nurse and a guard greeted me at the
door. We went up to the third floor of the large
building. In the day room, the nurse introduced me
to Hannah.
She was a sweet, silver-haired oldtimer with a
warm smile and a twinkle in her eye. I told her about finding the wallet and showed her the letter.
The second she saw the powder blue envelope
with that little flower on the left, she took a deep
breath and said, “Young man, this letter was the
last contact I ever had with Michael.”
She looked away for a moment deep in thought and then said softly, “I loved him very much. But I
was only 16 at the time and my mother felt I was
too young. Oh, he was so handsome. He looked
like Sean Connery, the actor.”
“Yes,” she continued. “Michael Goldstein was a
wonderful person. If you should find him, tell him I think of him often. And,” she hesitated for a
moment, almost biting her lip, “tell him I still love
him. You know,” she said smiling as tears began
to well up in her eyes, “I never did marry. I guess
no one ever matched up to Michael…”
I thanked Hannah and said goodbye. I took the elevator to the first floor and as I stood by the
door, the guard there asked, “Was the old lady able
to help you?”
I told him she had given me a lead. “At least I
have a last name. But I think I’ll let it go for a
while. I spent almost the whole day trying to find the owner of this wallet.”
I had taken out the wallet, which was a simple
brown leather case with red lacing on the side.
When the guard saw it, he said, “Hey, wait a
minute! That’s Mr. Goldstein’s wallet. I’d know it
anywhere with that bright red lacing. He’s always losing that wallet. I must have found it in the halls
at least three times.”
“Who’s Mr. Goldstein?” I asked as my hand began
to shake.
“He’s one of the oldtimers on the 8th floor. That’s
Mike Goldstein’s wallet for sure. He must have lost it on one of his walks.” I thanked the guard and
quickly ran back to the nurse’s office. I told her
what the guard had said. We went back to the
elevator and got on. I prayed that Mr. Goldstein
would be up.
On the eighth floor, the floor nurse said, “I think he’s still in the day room. He likes to read at
night. He’s a darling old man.”
We went to the only room that had any lights on
and there was a man reading a book. The nurse
went over to him and asked if he had lost his
wallet. Mr. Goldstein looked up with surprise, put his hand in his back pocket and said, “Oh, it is
missing!”
“This kind gentleman found a wallet and we
wondered if it could be yours?”
I handed Mr. Goldstein the wallet and the second
he saw it, he smiled with relief and said, “Yes, that’s it! It must have dropped out of my pocket
this afternoon. I want to give you a reward.”
“No, thank you,” I said. “But I have to tell you
something. I read the letter in the hope of finding
out who owned the wallet.”
The smile on his face suddenly disappeared. “You read that letter?”
“Not only did I read it, I think I know where
Hannah is.”
He suddenly grew pale. “Hannah? You know where
she is? How is she? Is she still as pretty as she
was? Please, please tell me,” he begged. “She’s fine…just as pretty as when you knew her.”
I said softly.
The old man smiled with anticipation and asked,
“Could you tell me where she is? I want to call her
tomorrow.” He grabbed my hand and said, “You
know something, Mister? I was so in love with that girl that when that letter came, my life literally
ended. I never married. I guess I’ve always loved
her.”
“Mr. Goldstein,” I said, “Come with me.”
We took the elevator down to the third floor. The
hallways were darkened and only one or two little night-lights lit our way to the day room where
Hannah was sitting alone watching the television.
The nurse walked over to her.
“Hannah,” she said softly, pointing to Michael, who
was waiting with me in the doorway. “Do you
know this man?”
She adjusted her glasses, looked for a moment,
but didn’t say a word. Michael said softly, almost
in a whisper, “Hannah, it’s Michael. Do you
remember me?”
She gasped, “Michael! I don’t believe it! Michael! It’s you! My Michael!” He walked slowly towards
her and they embraced. The nurse and I left with
tears streaming down our faces.
“See,” I said. “See how the Good Lord works! If it’s
meant to be, it will be.”
About three weeks later I got a call at my office from the nursing home. “Can you break away on
Sunday to attend a wedding? Michael and Hannah
are going to tie the knot!”
It was a beautiful wedding with all the people at
the nursing home dressed up to join in the
celebration. Hannah wore a light beige dress and looked beautiful. Michael wore a dark blue suit and
stood tall. They made me their best man.
The hospital gave them their own room and if you
ever wanted to see a 76-year-old bride and a 79-
year-old groom acting like two teenagers, you had
to see this couple. A perfect ending for a love affair that had lasted
nearly 60 years. # www.facebook.com/9jastudentforum #AoN


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Continues…
**in the party. In brenden’s table**
Brenden: hmmmm. The prestos is here already.(they were nine sitting in a round table. Their names were Brian, brandy,Brendan,bishop,barker,brast, billy, and their leader Brenden)
Billy: it really baffled me to see them here before us.
Brenden: well its already done. So have any of you seen Cassey?
Brian: yeah I saw her. I saw her and her crew. She seemed to be warning that girl you saved.
Brenden: hmmmm. The jealousy wey go kill that girl ehh still dey my house they train. What was she thinking?
Brian: I don’t know. I guess she was suspecting both of you.
Just then Cassey and her girls walked in.
Cassey: can I join you Brenden? (Avoiding the rest of the boys)
Brenden: madam cassey you can’t join us. You see space here again? abi na dat your big barka na you wan take suffocate us for here?
Cassey: why are you behaving this way?
Preston: and in what way am I behaving cassey?? Leader of ROCK ANGELS?? Answer me?? Cassey: so its because of that girl right? Ever since you met her you have been turning sideways at me(trying to cry)
Brenden: so are you telling me now you are jealous?
Cassey: why should I be?? Of course am not!!
Brenden: then if you are not, shut the hell up!!! And stop pissing me off!!!
Cassey: oh really?? I see where this is going to. And guess what? I am not shaken by your words. Just watch closer by the time and through with her, she will run out of this school with her legs. Girls let go!
Brenden: see this girl o. This girl wey just shayo for my front that day nai come here dey do like banga tree. I nor blame her sha she don dey drink blood na. Make I hear say she misbehave with that girl. Na dat day dem go hear of rock angels last!!
Brandy: hmmm don e be like say you too don fall for dat girl o
Brenden: I nor know o. Ever since I met her she does not seem to clear of from my memory even when I am drunk.
The boys just smiled and looked at eachother.Then they continued drinking *back in the hostel when I dozed off*
I had this terrible dream about me being chased around by pink and black girls. When running I fell down and as they were about to hit me with their weapons, I woke up. Then I noticed someone knocking the door.
Me: who is there(in a tired and sleepy tone)
Miranda: bae, open the door its me miranda
Me: oh I am coming.
I opened the door she came in with her shoes in her hands.
Me: I hope you are fine?? By the way who drove you home?
Miranda: Presley did. Actually it was the prestos. They just offered to give me a lift home.
Me: dats good for you I had to trek all the way home. And on getting here I saw some annoying girls with belinda in theit midst.
Miranda: OMG! hope you weren’t injured?
Me: nope. According to belinda they just came to warn me to leave preston alone for her.
Miranda: hmmm Preston actually told me that belinda was the leader of that group. They are called sparkle stars. He told me he broke up with her because she joined a cult. against his will.
Me: wow! Interesting
Miranda: he told me to warn you to be careful and also he told me to ask you to be his friend. So what’s your reply?
Me: hmmm I told you they will be the one to fall me. Didn’t I?
Miranda: please go away joor! For your mind. Will you accept the offer or not?
Me: humm tomorrow if I see him I will give him my answer.
Miranda: make sure its a yes oo.
Me: you nor trust me (We both laughed and slept off)
Miranda: you see your self. Stand up and enter bathroom joor!!
Me: leave me I want to fly!!(talking while sleeping) i want to fly with you lex. To any country. Let’s fly together.
Miranda: she couldn’t hold the laughter anymore she burst out laughing and that woke me up.
Me: what na why laughing?? You just distracted me from my dream.
Miranda: so who is lex?
Me: nobody!
Miranda: hmmm really?.
Me: yes really!(I walked to the bathroom took my bath and came out) I don’t want to be late for lecture today o. So hurry up!
Miranda: see who is talking?..
To be continued


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Full Bed Bath [Read it]


The nursing student, on her first rotation in the ICU, had to give a patient a full bed bath. She had never given one before and was terribly nervous about it.To make matters worse, the patient was a gentleman in his late sixties who had been admitted after a heart attack. As se nervously set her equipment up, she confessed to the patient that she had never given a full bed bath before.“I’ll tell you what,” he said, “how about if you wash as far down as possible, and as far up as possible, and then I’ll wash possible?”Related

Once a person saw Santa and Banta. Santa was digging a hole and Banta was filling it. Then they did the same act and kept repeating it.

The man came to them and asked what they were doing. Santa Banta replied that they were doing their duty by digging and filling the holes and the man who plants trees was absent that day.Related

Akpors was a bokoharam he now attended a church with d bomb the pastor started preaching give ur lives to jesus die for jesus is ur salvation o lord even if death comes now wait die because of jesus na him akpors hear all dis preaching he say to himself tanks God dis people like death he now walk to d pastor and say pastor wen u are preaching u say die for jesus SIR dis is a bomb d pastor fainted akpors say remain two minutes before we know d pastor has reach is house.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-23 07:33:23

562 Views




Ek Jaam Khankta Jaam



Ek Jaam Khankta Jaam, Ki Saqi Raat Guzrne Wali Hai;

Ek Hoshruba Inaam, Ki Saqi Raat Guzrne Wali Hai;



Wo Dekh Sitaron Ke Moti Har Aan Bikhrte Jaate Hain;

Aflaak Pe Hai Kohram, Ki Saqi Raat Guzrne Wali Hai;



Yeh Waqt Nahi Hai Baaton Ka Palkon Ke Saaye Kaam Mein La;

Ilham Koi Ilham, Ki Saqi Raat Guzrne Wali Hai;



Madhoshi Mein Ehsas Ki Unche Jeene Se Gir Jaane De;

Iss Waqt Na Mujh Ko Tham, Ki Saqi Raat Guzrne Wali Hai!Related

It’s Yusuf the wicked composer
Eyin omo Man-U(Man-U)
Eyin omo Man-U(Man-U)
Mo gbo information(mation)
Ninu radio(dio)
Ninu Tele(tele)
Won ni e je (iya)
E u n je(iya)
Ta lo n je iya (Man-U)
Ta lo n je (Man-U).
chorus
WO Man-U, Iya lobade
.Gbogbo Rooney pole Schweinsteiger yi Iya lobade aa
wo Man-U, Iya lobade Gbogbo enu ten niyi Iya lobade
Oya Alexis (Bobo)
Ogbasile bobo
Otun ge smalling bobo (Bobo)
Oya Ozil Bobo (Bobo)
otu gbasile Bobo (bobo) otun ge Jones Bobo (Bobo )....... # Smiles......Help me complete d rest. I go soon enter studio


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-07 23:45:34

691 Views



FUNNY GIRLS [Read it]


A Girl will like you for being funny... 3 months later when she's angry, she
will tell you, "You think everything's a
joke?"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-03-17 07:46:48

402 Views




Ek Bachche Ke School Test Mein Marks Kam Aaye To Teacher Bachche Ko Modern Tareeke Se Darati Hai.



Teacher: “Kal Chup Chap Apne Mummy-Papa Ko School Mein Le Aana.”



“Warna Main Tumhara Test Result Facebook Par Post Karke Tumhare Mummy Papa Ko Usmein Tag Kar Dungi.”



This Time Teacher Rocks, Children ShocksRelated

To paint the hearts of others with happiness we must lose some colours of our ego.

Good Morning!Related

Santa was writing something very slowly.

Banta: Why are u writing so slowly?

Santa: I’m writing to my 6 yr old son, he can’t read very fast.Related

Baby lizard [Read it]


Teacher: What is a baby lizard called? Akpos: A baby lizard is called lizzybaby.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-03-16 23:33:26

271 Views



Love qoute [Read it]


You must be a good runner because you are always running in my mind, you must be a good thief because you have stolen my heart, and i am always a bad shooter because I Miss You Always
You are like the sunshine so warm, you are like sugar, so sweet you are like you and that?s the reason why I love you!.




NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-02-01 10:48:39

318 Views




Ishmeal is 21years now and he needed to
continue his schooling. He did very well in his
senior high examination. ” mother, i want to
study abroad and i still insist on that.” ishmeal
said to his mother during their everning
discussion. His mother brought up many
arguements about the issue but ishmeal
persisted..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Miss cynthia relunctantly agreed. ” i
am already putting things in place. Our
passports are ready and i will be going to the
american embassy tomorrow.” ” are you taking
me along?” she asked in surprise. Ish couldnt
leave his mother behind because of the status
of her health.
Mrs cynthia was worried about the whole issue
because of how they are going to survive in a
foreign land. .
.
.
.
.
.
Within a month everything was
set and ready for ishmeal to leave with his
mum to the states.

He took juliet out during of
the nights to explain things to her. ” why did
you bring me to the field today?” she asked
whiles holding hands with ishmeal. After
talking about their own lives, ishmeal also
disclosed to her that he was leaving to the
states in a week time.
Juliet became speechless and sad because
she had to live without ishmeal by her side. ”
why must you study outside while there are
universities in this country aswell. Please stay
with me? She pleaded. Ishmeal became quite
instantly, he knew studies wasnt his only
reason for going to the states.. ” dont you
worry dear, i will come for you when the time
is right.” he tried to calm her down. ” you will
be leaving to KNUST soon and that wouldnt
make you feel lonely. Besides, John is always
running at your feet” he mocked. They both
laughed and ishmeal was happy to place her
in such a moood.
“I will like to invite you to our new apartment
before you leave.” juliet disclosed to him. Ish
agreed with the suggestion and went with her
a week later. It was a huge mansion in the
estate. It was located in achimota but abit far
from their previous settlement. It was so
beautiful. Ishmeal was pleased to see it and
after the orientation, juliet took him to the hall.
” this is our new home. Mum and dad is
actually not around. They took my siblings to
the hospital for a checkup.” she said with
excitement. “its beautiful” ish commented with
his hands in his pocket.
Juliet moved close to him and placed her
hands around his neck. ” i realised you were
leaving to the states not only for education
but to find christiana aswell. Dont forget me
when you find her and always remember that
there is a heart beating in achimota for you,
ish. I love you soo much. I didnt realise it
when we were kids but now i feel it inside me.
She said to him with a passionate tone. ‘ i am
sorry’ ish remembered what he said to
christiana years ago. He stood mute, staring
into her eyes but he was lost in thoughts.
What happens next

>>

A Nigerian ambassador visited Russia
and was entertained by the Russian
ambassador. For three days, the
Nigerian ambassador was wined, dined
and generally treated to the best
hospitality that Russia had to offer. On the last day of his visit, the Russian
ambassador said, "As your stay is
coming to an end, it's time for you to
play our traditional game, Russian
roulette. One of the six chambers of this
gun is loaded - you spin the cylinder, point the gun at your head, and pull the
trigger." This phased the Nigerian slightly, but he
was a proud man of a warrior people
and to show fear would be unthinkable.
Both men took their guns, spun and
pulled the triggers. Both chambers were
empty, and both ambassadors breathed a sigh of relief. The Nigerian
ambassador was impressed with the
courageous game and thought hard
about the subject before the Russian
ambassador was due to visit his country
the next year. When the visit came, the Nigerian
ambassador treated the Russian with all
hospitality, until the final day of his
stay. Leading him to a private room in
the quarters, the Nigerian ambassador
spoke, "Now, it's time for you to sample our game, Nigerian roulette." He then led the Russian into the room,
the only occupants of which were six
stunning and Unclad Nigerian girls. The
Nigerian ambassador said, "These girls
are the most beautiful members of one
of our states. Any one of them will give you sex, take your pick." The Russian was not entirely averse to
this idea, but he couldn't see the
connection with Russian Roulette. He
said, "Well, okay, great, but where's the
roulette part? Where's the danger?" With a big grin on his face, the Nigerian
ambassador answered, "Two of them
has H.I.V."
#?BOLLY_SMART?™


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-02-23 19:41:55

980 Views



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