#Adult SMS Jokes Hashtag:


A white man was on a safari in Africa. He saw a black man bathing in a river and noticed the guy was really well-endowed.

In fact, it was hanging below the knees. The white man stared in astonishment.

The black man asked in anger: What’s the matter, does not the white man’s member shrink in cold water?Related

Banta: What is the similarity between doing sex & doing surgery?

Santa: Skill is more important than the instrument…Related

Big boobs don’t count if you’re fat;

And well, big dicks don’t count if you are one!Related

One of the side effects of Viagra is a headache. Every time, I take a pill, my wife gets a headache!Related

Santa: If I sleep with your best friend what will be the first thought to cross your mind?

Wife: That you are a homosexual.Related

Santa came home to find evidence that his wife had been unfaithful.

Santa: Was it my friend Banta?

Jeeto: No, it wasn’t.

Santa: Was it my friend Bhupi?

Jeeto: No, it wasn’t?

Santa: Was it my friend Joginder?

Jeeto screamed, “No it wasn’t”. “Don’t you think I have any friends of my own?”Related

Ladka: Kash Main Tera Blouse Hota, To Sara Din Tere Se Chipka Rehta.

Ladki: Fir Saara Maza Koi Aur Leta Aur Tu Khidki Pe Tanga Jhool Raha Hota!Related

Pappu took her dumb girlfriend to see a Hockey match. He explained the field layout.

Pappu: See that man in front – he is the forward, and that guy at the back – he is the defence.

Girlfriend: Oh no, he is forward, too – I’ve been out with him a couple of times!Related

God made orgasms… otherwise people will not know when to stop screwing each other!Related

Facebook is the second most famous word that starts with an ‘F’ and ends with a ‘K’!Related

1st Girl: What’s the spelling of PENIS?

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2nd Girl: Oh My God! It is so easy. But exactly Yaad Nahi Aa Raha… Abhi Thodi Der Pehle Hi Mere Munh Mein Tha!Related

Accurate communication is so important.

A woman to a man during sex:

‘Keep it up!’

Man wonders if it was a complaint or a compliment!Related

Santa: Son, what do you wanna be when you grow up?

Pappu: Dad, I want to be a pizza delivery boy.

Dad: What?

Pappu: Yeah, or I would like to be a gardener or a plumber.

Santa: You went through my porn videos again, did you?Related

Why is the game of Golf totally wrong?

It’s because you hold a club and put the balls in the hole;

Instead of holding the balls and putting the club in the hole!Related

Mary went to the doctor complaining of body odour.

“Do you wash?” the doc asked the rank young girl.

“Oh, yes”, Mary answered. “Each morning, I start at my head and wash down as far as possible. Then I start at my feet and wash up as far up as possible.”

“Well”, the doc concluded, “Go home and wash, Possible!”Related

Women should have equal rights to men.
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It would be awesome if women were allowed to walk around with their tops off! :thinking:Related

Don’t carry umbrella during rain, keep WHISPER on ur head coz yeh ghanto tak geelepan ka ehsas bhi na hone de.Related

Pappu had diarrhea. He tells his mom that he needs Viagra.

Jeeto: Why on Earth do you need that?

Pappu: Isn’t that what you give daddy when his shit doesn’t get hard?Related

Growing up means realizing that a lot of your childhood friends are assholes!Related

Instead of learning unconditional Love, Faithfulness, Honesty and Loyalty from dogs –

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the only thing we learn is their ‘Postion’!Related

What do you call a group of people where 2 people are thinking of sex and all other are thinking of food and drinks?

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A Wedding!Related

Frustrated Rajinikanth:

It’s really height of personal attack by saying that I can screw without a dick!Related

WARNING:

Drinking alcoholic beverages before pregnancy can cause pregnancy!Related

Q: What do you call it when a person with multiple personality disorder masturbates?

A: An orgy.Related

A professor was asked to give a talk on Sex

When his turn came, he stood, walked to the podium, adjusted the microphone just so. He said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure.”

And he sat back down.Related

Somewhere between :



“Uncle chocolate dena” &


“Uncle chocolate wala dena”,



we all grew up… ????????????????????Related

Santa: Chris Gayle by hitting 175 runs in an IPL match has spoilt my married life.

Banta: How?

Santa: Jeeto wants me to perform like him in bed!Related

Q: What’s the closest thing to a woman’s period?

A: Your salary. It comes once a month lasts about 3-4 days and if it doesn’t come everythings fucked.Related

Not everyone can brag about getting a handjob from their barber after a haircut…
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But then again, not everyone cuts their own hair.Related

A padded bra is like real estate… the super built-up area is very impressive but the actual carpet area is disappointing!Related

Wimbledon is a lot like Bollywood. Women may strut their stuff in short skirts, but in the end it’s all about the men.Related

A recent survey confirmed that 87% of the women want to have sex after marriage…

My question is,

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“Where are they?”Related

Mr Chu from China & Mr Tiya from Korea came to India & setup a Firm. Till now, they have no Business & are still wondering why their firm: CHUTIYA & CO. failed?Related

Why do men like big tits and a tight ass?

Because they’ve got big mouths and little dicks!Related

A man is doing push ups on the beach, Santa sees him and starts laughing loudly and says, “Sorry to tell you but the women below you has already left.”Related

Santa: I am all for women’s rights.

Banta: That’s new to me. But still how?

Santa: They actually get a choice between a “School Girl” or a Nurse’s outfit when I’m horny!Related

Jeeto: What’s the best form of birth control at my age?

Santa: Nudity.Related

I simply love the tan lines that girls get after sunbathing? It’s almost like god came down and highlighted all the important parts!Related

A Desi girl texts to her friend: Pata Nahi Kyun Boys Inbox Mein Mujhe ‘Tongue’ Karte Rehte Hein!Related

A guy while giving speech to deaf people, rubs chest, touches groin and starts masturbating. When asked about the reason for doing so, replies that it means, “Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure…”Related
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